Further Than The End?'s Blog
The last time I asked for directions
I did not recognize the road behind me. I certainly did not recognize the road before me. Was the road really before me? I thought about this for a short period of time. What came first, me or the road? Good question. So on I went, traveling down the dark path. The double-yellow lines sectioning off my life from the oncoming silence. My life. I could not pass it by.
About that time I was sipping a freshly prepared glass of iced tea (yes, I brew iced tea as I drive, it's not a problem). The soothing aroma of tea mixed with the quenching taste of ice laid me down in the bucket seat with such delight I almost forgot I was lost. But alas, I did not identify with my surroundings.
Over the next hill and around the next bend I saw a quaint, promising general store. Yes. A "general store". When was the last time I saw a general store? Have I ever actually seen a general store? What did they sell at a general store? Maybe a broad array of items. I often enjoy having a wide selection of anything. When you come into a point in your life where you happen upon a store like this you just have to stop. I slammed on my brakes (no skidding, thanks anti-lock) and turned into the accepting gravel of which I assume is the parking lot.
It was a beautiful day. Through my windshield I could see the warm sun wrapping itself around all that longed to be found. Before I left the safety of my car and entered into this historic moment of my life (I knew I would remember this day forever), I decided I needed to prepare myself. I grabbed my free sample bottle of hand sanitizer that I found randomly on my local grocer's hand sanitizer shelf. I knew I should never go anywhere with unclean hands. Cleanliness is next to... I pondered. And pondered. Then I realized something much greater than anything I ever -ized the real- of before, it's okay not to remember.
Opening the door to my car I was rushed by a pack of sweet scents that my "closed-nostriled" nose never had the pleasure of meeting. "I don't believe we met," I thought to myself. I spent a couple seconds being polite and humoring these scents which I had a feeling I would never meet again. Once the niceties were over I could breathe clear again.
The store was right in front of me. Through the windows the patrons and employees must have seen me pull up, yet I could not see in. The sun which embraced me also took the sight from me with a glare reflected back to my tired eyes. I had been driving for hours, and it felt good to stretch my legs.
There must have been a shortage of good lumber back in the old days because the entrance was just what I expected it to be. Those small saloon doors you see in wannabe old timey movies. I could barely grasp the feeling I was having as I pushed those hinged doors open with the authority of someone who knew what he was going to do. I may have forgotten many things in my life. I once forgot my keys. I once forgot to set my clocks back. I have completely forgotten my own birthday. But my purpose today rained down on me, and drenched in fear, I could not take shelter from the storm. I was lost.
The store was wonderful. It had everything I could generally need. There were no customers. Just one elderly gentleman standing behind the counter to my left. He stared at me with the intensity of a rabid dog living in urban squalor. City life was never good for a down on his luck dog. I nodded to him and turned to my right.
How many aisles were there? I couldn't even begin to count! Actually I could. It was three. The first aisle had some great stuff. The second aisle had some other great stuff. All of which I might need at sometime in my forlorn life. Today was not that sometime. Except there in the third aisle was a snow globe obviously leftover from last holiday season. It was a kitten with its paw in a mitten reaching for a stocking hung gracefully over a glowing fireplace. I picked up the decoration and gingerly shook it. To my amazement I was greeted with the most astonishing display of snowflakes. They came in on that kitten from all angles. They swarmed and swooshed, resting ever so gently onto the floor. They made me feel home again. I was sad. I was not home.
Finally, I was ready. With the world of snow held in my hand I walked past the refrigerated section on my right. The clerk's counter was approaching. I could not stop what happened next.
The man said to me, "Will that be it?" I nervously said, "Yes." That was it. My plan had failed. I needed to ask this man for directions, and I just told him there was no more he could do for me. What was I going to do?
Using an ancient crank-operated cash register the invigorating help rang me up. "Cha-ching," I said aloud right after the man was finished totaling my purchase. I just knew that this old cash box would make a nifty sound when he opened the till. He looked at me oddly. He had yet to actually open the till. I smiled. The awkward moment passed. I handed him my credit card. With my arm outstretched, the man gazed at me with the most peculiar stare. The furrowing of his brow. The utter shock on his lips. "We don't take credit cards."
My experienced was ruined. How could I keep going if I could not ask for directions and not buy this fabulous snow globe? I knew I didn't have much cash on me. I didn't see an ATM. That's when I understood why. This store had no electricity of any kind. All the ambient light was provided by candles strategically placed throughout the store. This sure was an experience I would never forget.
I emptied my pockets. I rummaged through my belongings and produced three dollars and fourteen cents. Not enough for the snow globe. I must have looked like a lost puppy. So discouraged I lowered my head and turned to leave the store. Lost and without my kitten.
Suddenly as I approached the doors, I was awakened. There is often a turning point in one's life where you make a stand for what you believe in. I turned to the man and said, "I'm lost." He sighed and said, "Here, take the snow globe." Life was good.
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