Gary Next Door

Who I'd like to meet:

I guess people of my own frame of mind.....what that is, is the question. If your taking the time to read this i'll try......well I own a 1965 Ford falcon.....but I drive a 1990 honda accord...why....well because I worry about my personal fossil fuel consumption. I am part owner of the smallest house in my neighborhood…..and fukin proud of it…….I don’t want the biggest shiniest house on the block. I love the fact that I have mowed my lawn once this entire year……why…because of people like my neighbor across the road, who has a fucking golf course in his front yard which he has pumped gallons of chemicals into his to achieve that unnatural emerald green fukin sheen. I recycle…I fukin hate it...man it’s a pain in the ass, but I do it anyways. My biggest regret of last year, was not building that giant snowman in my front yard that would be holding a big sign that said “QUITE IDLING YOUR CAR” I’ll sit the most beautiful young girl in the bar down to ask if she realizes she’s hurting her boyfriend by dressing like that and flirting with every guy in there. I tell everybody about my bowel movements. I’d do anything to help any of my friends…..unless they’re being a cock then I’ll tell em to fuk off. I go to work everyday and do my best, but not because I like to work…but because I’m thinking about how much easier it is to take time off if my boss likes me. I don’t really party anymore….I’d much rather go to bed early so I can get up the next day and go ride my bike with my friends. Not to say that I don’t like to “do er up” once in a while though…but even then im still in bed by 12. I suck ass at games like chess and poker. I don’t like to play into that whole testosterone bullshit that allot of guys seem so keen to…..fukin dick for brains…..I have met the love of my life…..im not sure if it will work out between her and I……but I do know what real, honest to gad sit on a fukin grenade, love feels like. I don’t know too much about politics…but I do know the more I learn the more pissed off I become. I don’t think any country should be run by anyone who gives a fuk about the sex of the person I sleep with. I don’t believe in organized religion…..100,000 years of warring against people that are different than you cant be right. My friends range in age from 20-50 and I can relate them all. Holy hell ok that’s enuf….so that’s me.