Barry Pyramid was born Barvik de Pyramiden on the 14th March 1972 at grid reference 78°38-16°20 in a warehouse on the edge of Pyramiden; a Russian settlement and coal mining community on the island of Spitzbergen at the foot of a pyramid shaped mountain which was believed by Lenin to possess mystical energy.
Soviet scientists theorised that this energy was transmitted by a mysterious particle known as the zagadkon or Z-particle. In the 1950s a research base was constructed deep underground to measure these Z-rays. Some believed that the energy was created by the interaction between pyramids and space -time geometry while others believed that they were the result of left over alien technology.
Spitzbergen offered little in the way of lifestyle choice, the only entertainment being antifreeze and low grade pornography. A typical Saturday nights entertainment was to drink several pints of photocopier fluid shandy and then wander into the wilderness to gun down polar bears with automatic weapons.
While Barry grew up he was tutored by some of the finest minds in the Soviet Union and developed a fascination in sonic topology. For his PhD thesis Barry wrote a revolutionary paper theorising the existence of extra dimensional musical notes such as A³ or D[E[F]].
This research eventually came to the attention of Lee Cabinet during 2003 while convalescing after a car crash. Cabinet was looking for a radical new sound for his new Mothership album and believed the answer lied in mathematics. Pyramid was invited to play guitar on the final Kettlecup Corp album Kettlecup Undead, appeared in the Library Mix video and was given a flat in Wythenshawe and a workstation.
Three months later Barry Pyramid emerged with a new milestone in cultural evolution...I Pyramid.
Are we not using Facebook anymore then? I only have the time and patience for one socinet (if no one else has called this yet I want to claim it as mine; social networking = socinet, I invented that, just you remember) site.
I'm confused by the technology I spent a fortune keeping up to date with.
my bet is someone has commandeered your myspace account mr pyramid... either that or you've turned into an average american housewife overnight. (see my comments)
No randoms reply anymore. I'm starting to think this is obsolete. Where have all the randoms gone? Have they all found a purpose and therefore ceased to be random?
"Justice concerns the proper ordering of things and persons within a society". it is of no surprise to me that you know nothing of it. i was naive to believe so. distribution and retribution are concepts for the more socially ordered.
you can tranq me with whatever you fucking like pyramid... you'll not even have to hold me down, though i may fight just for effect. may i suggest lorazepam? it's one of my favourites.
as per our earlier discussion i wish to publicly clarify the issue. i am aware the banana is not a fruit in the biological sense but try telling society that. it took them long enough to come to terms with the tomato and that's barely accepted. besides... it unnerves people when you tell them something they always believed to be true is not. come to think of it... i once had a one-eyed maths teacher that tried to tell everyone a carrot was a fruit.
i have had the banana theory for quite some time now. it is only due to the disability i have had the time to articulate it. there is nothing that is not serving a purpose for someone... somewhere.
they may just be the finest friends i ever saw. which mong picture? you must specify. there are so many. oh... actually... have you seen this shadowy character? i think he stole all my money...
i was 'otherwise engaged' from the hour of 9 and the half. that, added to the fact that in my weakened physical state i often forget to sign out, tends to mean i'm sometimes electronically present for 24 hours or more. and that's quite an array of photographic memories you have. fine viewing my friend... fine viewing.
In the intervening years I had just about managed to erase that picture from my mind now, without warning, it reappears. This time I fear professional counselling will be required. You are a sick man Pyramid.
well. i have to say the subject of semi-clad men in speedboats has not arisen, which is surprising considering your amusing pre-occupation with bumming. i suggest that he is a crimefighting young maverick from australia posing as a telecommunications installer in london, where he actually installs micro-electronic devices to covertly assimilate information and survey the activities of various nefarious characters. his previous occupation of diving instructor would support this theory as it would come in useful in many aspects of his daily work.
The colour of my tongue is entirely dependant on what just passed through my mouth. Since the photo was taken at your house I can only assume that the 'meal' you provided was made largely of puss & shit. As for Titchmarsh; you know damn well the reason for my bloodlust and I don't intend to repeat it here, I don't want to ruin the surprise when I finally confront him. I have imagined the scenario many times but the current favourite resembles the end of Commando; 'let off some steam Titchmarsh'.
said bike was purchased before the application of protective outerwear therefore the opportunity to co-ordinate was present, which i declined. i did however purchase a nice matching helmet with stars on it. its mighty fetching. And thank you, you've just reminded me i must put my wheeled foreign object debris receptacle on the roadside perambulation area.
Please help me. I spent one year of my life working with my soul brother
Lee Cabinet on a David Hasselhoff tribute album. People laughed at me. They said no one likes that electro pop sound anymore, why don't you get a job as a traffic cop.
They said I had no crew and that I wore an unfashionable jacket.
True enough, there were
moments I spent paralised by hate and self loathing, but in the end it just made me more determined as I synthesised waveforms until dawn. Rubbing my face with the first album off the production line, still warm from the manufacturing process
was the proudest moment in my life.
Unfortunately as the days and then the years went by without the
album selling a single unit I began to question the economic viability of crimefighter themed concept albums. Lee Cabinet attempted to distance himself from the album and began claiming that he only worked on the cover.
Now I want to present David with a copy of my tribute to him in person. Can you help me find him? Where did you last see him? Where does he hang out?
Are you aware of the MightyvBoosh and their ditty 'Mod Wolves'? I feel this may be of interest...and no, I don't know who is behind it but I will find out...
Hi Barry Pyramid
Thanks for the request your support is very much appreciated. You must have really great taste. Please help to spread the word of The X-Ray Dogs by telling all your friends about us. Cheers! XRD
