Bad Idea Bears

About me:

We are the cutest puppets of your subconscious minds - The Bad Idea Bears! We are from the Broadway hit musical "Avenue Q" Yay!!!

About us: We look like a cross between Snuggle and the Care Bears. But we act like we're taking orders straight from Chucky. We're a cute, cuddly version of the little devil that whispers evil thoughts in your ear. Only, we're two-teaming it, and there's no little angel around for balance. You just want to hug us! But trust us. You'll be lots safer clamping hands over our mouths. We are bouncy, high-pitched voices urge you to do the not-so-smart thing with so much enthusiasm, it might even seem like a good idea at the time.

Example: When broke and jobless English major Princeton gets money from his parents, the Bad Idea Bears suggest not only that he spend it on beer, but that he get a case of it, since buying in bulk is so much cheaper. "Yaaaay!" they say, chenille cheerleaders to the fall.

It's a brilliant concept: Upbeat teddy bears trot out wicked suggestions with such plush sweetness. Succumb to temptation and those Bad Idea Bears deserve the blame for your maxing out the credit cards, lapping up drinks beyond your known limit, hogging the entire pint of Ben & Jerry's, cheating on a test, lying to a friend, ditching a duty, running a red light, antagonizing the neighbor's dog, wearing too-tight clothes and flirting (or worse) with highly inappropriate targets. Here's what they sound like. "Oh, go ahead and stand on that swivel chair to change the light bulb. It's right here, and it'll only take a minute!" "That landscape looks a little bare. Plant some kudzu. It grows really well here." "Thirsty? A Long Island Iced Tea would hit the spot. So what if it's lunch? You could dehydrate!" "You can juuuuuuuuust reach that if you stand on the top rung. Warning label? Well, if you put your foot on top of it, you won't even notice." In our right and sober minds, we'd like to think we know better. In our hearts, we know that sometimes, we just won't.



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