With the approaching Christmas season we can go nowhere and not be exposed to the mindnumbing sounds of the season. Being force to hear these songs as I am daily at work I have no other choice then to break down these songs and find the true meanings. The worst of these songs is the beloved childrens song "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer." This song is filled with horrible messages for our children. I will break it down for you.
Rudolph the red nosed reindeer, had a very shiny nose, and if you ever saw it, you would even say it glows
What is this line telling our children. I'll tell you what. It is telling them that it is ok to look at and make comments about people's (and in this case a reindeer) horribly disfigurements. You wouldn't tell kids its ok to stare at and talk about a guy in a wheel chair or who had his face burnt off in some industrial accident.
All of the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names, they never let poor Rudolph, join in any reindeer games
This of course is telling kids that it is ok to laugh at and call people names that have horrible disfigurements and to not include them in their fun activities. You wouldn't tell your kids its ok to call names and leave out someone in a wheel chair or who had their face burnt off in a horrible industrial accident. Plus, it just shows us that Donner and Blitzen and the other reindeer are fucking assholes.
Then one foggy Christmas eve, Santa came to say, Rudolph with your nose so bright, won't you guide my sleigh tonight
Where was Santa this whole time? Why did he never stand up for Rudolph before and tell his asshole reindeer to leave him alone? Santa is supposed to be all about kindness and tolerance but he never says a word. He never cared about Rudolph until he needed something from him that fat hipocritical bastard. Rudolph should have told Santa to go fuck himself.
Then all the reindeer loved him, as the shouted out with glee, Rudolph the red nosed reindeer, you'll go down in history
This is the part that pisses me off the most. Rudolph just forgives and forgets after years and years of abuse. I bet after Christmas it went right back to the way it was. Constant pointing and laughing at poor Rudolph. This is not the message we need to be sending. We need to teach our kids to stand up for themselves. If Rudolph had any balls he would have led Santa and his asshole reindeer right into the side of a fucking mountain.