|Here is the full chapter of diane haughton's psychic reading with john edward. it's pretty long, but it's a powerful read. |
John Edwards with Diane Haughton (Aaliyah's Mother)
After Life: Answers from the Other side
available at amazon.com
We rang the bell of Suite 722, and a very attractive woman named Diane, whom I didn't recognize, answered the door and welcomed us in. She seemed very gentle, quiet, and sad. We sat on the couch in front of a table laid out with a single red rose and a lit candle, and began what proceeded to be a very emotional, tear-filled session.
Almost immediately, a strong energy took over and dominated the entire reading- which is rare. Usually three of four energies will come through in a private session, vying for attention. Although you might be able to figure out earlier than I did, it wasn't until we were finished over an hour later did I learn who the "celebrity" in question was. What follows is an abidged version of the reading, which is too long to include in it's entirety. But I present most of it in chronological order, so you can experience the process as it unfolded. And as you'll see, the information flowed with intensity- with messaged from a strong energy who had a strong presence in life, too.
John: okay, the first thing i'm going to tell you is that I have a male who's coming through, claiming to be above you, and he is making it like he's either your father or your stepfather, but he's an older male. He's making me feel that I need to acknowledge the letter "W", like he's connected to the letter "W". I also have somebody younger who's passed. I feel like somebody lost their child. And the older man is letting me know that the child is here. But with this child, this isn't a health care passing- this is something that happened. So it's got to be an event or something that actually takes place that caused that person to pass. To me it feels impact related. So I feel like somebody passes with an impact, with a gunshot, there's a BANG that takes place, and it's not a suicide. This is not a suicide, this is not somebody claiming responsibility- well, it's not that they're not claiming responsibility, they are kind of claiming responsibility. They're making me feel like they put themselves in the wrong position, the wrong place at the wrong time. And this event was extremely publicized. There are headlines and spotlights all around it. And they're showing me that there are three or four occurenced when people
were reporting something that seems to be slightly off, like something was being reported and things were being left out of the report. And the way it was being reported made this individual look bad, and I feel as is I need to bring this up is someway. I don't know, it's like this wierd - I don't want to call it controversy, but there's some controversial issue that comes up with this, okay? Now, I'm going to go back and say that this male who's coming through again is claiming to be above you- that means the father, the uncle, the grandfather. He wants me to know that this younger male is coming throught with him. I'm calling it a male energy because there's a very dominant energy attached to this. It may be female, but if this is a girl who's passed, I'm getting a very dominant energy. I have to let you know that he comes through with this child, but in particular, I know that you lost a child. You understand that? Is that true?
John: now there's an "A" name connection that comes up here. They want me to acknowledge the "A", okay? And they're making me feel like I also need to acknowledge the other son, the brother. They tell me to acknowledge the boy who's here. They're showing me your son- living, then you have a daughter that passed. Right?
(RASHAAD HAUGHTON Aaliyah's Brother)
John: okay, here's the deal. She has a very dominant energy. The way it comes across, I would think you lost a son, because this energy is very masculine, very strong and tough. But her toughness is not exterior; it's not an external toughness. It's an internal, spiritual kind of toughness. And she wants her brother to know that she came through. Her major concern is for you. She's making me feel like you two were more like sisters, or buddies. She wants me to tell you to talk about going to the church, going to the priest, going to the place, and you were there by yourself. I'm feeling a very spiritual-feeling place, wether it be a church, a temple, I don't know. I'm in this place, while i'm here, I feel like nobody is physically there with you, it's like your quiet time, it's your place to be there. And she's making me feel like she was there with you, I don't know if you're coming up on the second month of her passing, if you're coming up on the second anniversary of her passing, but I feel like we're coming up on two, and she's making me feel like I need to talk to you about selling your property, or you selling the house, or you selling the stuff that's coming up, and she sees this. Okay? She doesn't talk about her father, though. The father is not around?
Diane: he is, he's around.
John: he's living?
John: where does the "L" come in for him? Like Len, or Leo or Lee or Leah...?
Diane: that's her name.
John: she wants me to acknowledge the Len, Lee, or Leo kind of version. I feel like- I want to take that and call her that... or Dad maybe called her that.
Diane: he called her LiLi most of the time!
John: she's telling me to tell you what you wrote was published, that something you wrote was published, and she's acknowledging that. And she wants to know about the yellow tattoo or yellow painting thing that comes up here that she wants me to bring up. Okay? She knows that. I'm back to the fact that her passing was an event. There's an accident. But she's not driving this; this is not something she was responsible for. But I feel like "I don't have to be here," like " I don't have to be in the vehicle." like "I didn't have to be here."
John: but it's the right time because she was done with what she had to do here, as hard as that might be to say. But I feel like she's doing more now there. She wants me to go back again, because one of the major things you're having a hard time with is how she passes.
John: and she's making me feel like she doesn't want to tell me. She doesn't want to tell me how she passed. She's making me feel like you understand what I'm saying and I don't have to describe to you exactly what happened, although I'd rather hear it from her. But she's saying she won't, she's not going to go there. She's making me feel like.... she's in the backseat, and I feel like she could have been taking a nap, she could have had her headphones on, she could have been reading a book, whatever. There's all this hustle and bustle happening. She's getting whooshed off, like I feel like i'm being whooshed, like I have to go to me next place.
Diane: (nodding): Yes...
John: Now, she did not pass on September 11th, but she's telling me to tell you 9/11, she's showing me 9/11. There's something about 9/11 connected to her in some way or to your family or to her, but its like some of the families that I dealt with that are 9/11 related, they didn't have the ability to physically memorialize the person. You were able to do that in some respects, but there are things of hers that were not reclaimed, were missing, were things that you didn't get back.
John: she's telling me that April is a significant month. It might be a birthday or an anniversary.
John: Now I feel very, very clearly that you walk around acknowledging her, you know there's something else. Your belief, your faith, and your spirituality are very much intact. What you're not honoring, and I'm sorry to put you on the spot, because I don't really know you, but what you're not honoring is your own grief. And one of the things that I have to tell you is that I believe the only way to get back the love that you have, that unconditional love as a parent for this child, is to honor that grief. Because grief is the other side of love. Whe you take away the physical person, the object you direct that love toward, you don't know where to put that love. You don't know where it goes. But she's still here. She's still connected here. You know, she's the one who arranged this. It's like she's taking the credit for doing this. And she's making me feel that there's so much stuff left that's not finished with her, like the stuff she was working on, something that wasn't finished.
Diane: Yes, yes.
John: did she write? She must have been a writer, cause she had to do something that would be - they're making me feel that something important is coming out, like being published. There's a writing thing about her. I think they're making a movie on her, on a smaller level maybe you're making a documentary on her? They're showing me Selena. You're not related to Selena are you?
John: then she's got to be like Selena.
John: she wants me to acknowledge your mom - your biological mom. You mom and she have overlapping similarities. There's a parallel between both, whether it be the same names, similar dates, there's like a similarity that comes up there.... and a few people pass in a short period of time as wel... that you don't finish grieving one person and then this happens, that's my feeling. You're still dealing with the loss of one person, and now this compounds that feeling.
John: if they're going to do something writing-wise about her, you need to do it. You need to be the person to do it. Not somebody else. With her own stuff, whatever she did job-wise was she trying to get more active in the control?
John: she wants you to learn the same. So when you do something, it's going to be therapeutic and healing to you, and you're going to get it right. Your son shouldn't do it- you should do it. Even if you have to work with a writer who's going to capture your voice, you feelings, and your private moments that you want to share. And then, if there's a movie or whatever, it can be made from your book. Not on what somebody else's idea is, or what they think is should be. You know I feel like- I don't know if that gold chain is yours, if she gave that to you, but she wants me acknowledge that...
John: she's talking about getting hair, getting a wig. Is somebody going for hair extensions? Did somebody get some type of... after she passed, did you find something or have something delivered that was hers, hair related?
John:from when she was a child?
John: She must have been out of my state when she passed. She wasn't in New York?
(ROCK THE BOAT - Aaliyah was in the Bahamas at her time of passing)
John: where's Betty? Besty or Beebee, or there's a "B" name she trying to acknowledge. It might be her way of saying hello to somebody who's still here. She said it's weird that you got this room. Was there something in this room when you got here that struck you as a sign from her? Or the number? What room is this?
John: 722? Does 722 have a meaning for you? This is a big building, and there could have been a lot of rooms they could have given you. But we got this one. She's highlighting this.
Diane: she was 22 when she passed.
Diane: and she loved this hotel... it was her favorite.
John: you have an unconditional type of connection to her, whatever she did you encouraged and were excited about. She doesn't want to tell me how she passed? I'm begging her.. sometimes they won't do that; sometimes they feel like it's more important- and she doesin this case- to move away from the physical passing and focus on the living, on herself, on those still here. Did you make your own DVD or CD of her stuff, that other people wouldn't have access to?
Diane: I have a cd that only I have.
John: nobody else has it, right? She's acknowledging that. Do you have an SUV? She's telling me there's a joke about the navigation thing in the car - either her making a joke with you about that or you were driving and it was telling you where to go and telling you what to do, and you said out loud to youself, or to her, that is she was here she'd be making fun of this.
Diane: yes, she joked a lot about that!
John: she says something about the pink blouse, the pink shirt, do you still have that?
Diane: I do.
(PINK TEDDY BEAR)
Aaliyah's favorite color is pink
John: you just need to know that the stuff comig through with- the older man we talked about in the beginning, the father figure, your mom, the great aunt - these are the people who are with her on the other side. She's not alone; she's got family and friends there. She's very clear in the fact that she was a social person in life, and she's equally social on the other side. Your spirtual beliefs- hold on to them. They're going to pull you and your family through this. But she's making me feel like you need to be the Matriarch, that you need to be the person that.... you know when you sit on the plane and the oxygen mask drops down and they say you need to put your mask on first before you can help the person next to you? That's what your life is like right now. If the mask drops down, you've got to make sure you take care of yourself first. You've got to take care of you so that you can be able to take of the other people in your family. Once you do that, the you can incorporate her still being part of your life, and in knowing,,, and that word is probably the one thing that I want you to leave here with today: "knowing". Because the only thing that got me through when I was 19 years old and just lost my mother was that I had the knowing. I remember pulling up one night at 5am after being out all night and thinking, nobody cares right now that I'm out at 5am. Sure, my grandmother was downstairs, and yes she cared, but she was afraid to say anything to me. My point in saying this right now is that I feel like everybody's in that spot I just described. They're all pulling up at 5 am thinking that nobody else cares. Your son, you, your husband. But everytime you talk about your daughter, you'll realize that you all care, you all care about the same thing, and by honoring that and by takng about her and what she's left... because according to her, she's left a lot- and I don't mean money, I mean like her persona, herself, her image... whatever. By honoring that, you can know she's still connected by the bonds of love that bound you all when she was here.
Diane: [crying softly now]
John: okay, now she keeps showing me some sort of- I haven't said this yet because I don't know what it means, but she keeps showing me the parking garage on West 56th Street where I taped the show for the first few years. She's showing me standing at the entrance of that parking garage at West 56th. Do you
have any ties to that parking garage on West 56th?
John: I literally feel like I'm standing right there where there's the wall with the advertisements. I'm not sure is she's talking about the advertisements,
could be, I don't know.
Diane: she used to go to the studio around there.
John: maybe she parked there?
Diane: could be....
John: but I need to make sure that you know that she's okay. Ad that she understande how painful of an experience today has been, and how painful dealing
with all of this has been for you. And she's making me feel like it's really important that you know she appreciates everything you tried to do and that
you continue to do. And she has ley you know she's around. You do sense her, but at the same time you wish it away or you're kinda... "I'm making it up",
or "I'm not really sure". Today it's different, because it's like she's really unleashing herself on you in a way that you weren't ready for until very
recently. And I feel like all of a sudden it became, "Okay, I can do this, I can do this."
John: and then there's like an apprehension. I would have to say that within the hour before we even got here, you probably were sayins, " I don't want
to do this, I don't want to do this, I don't want to do this." Do you understand?
Diane: yes, i do.
John: but she's okay. She's definitely, definitely, okay. Now when all this is said and done, I want you to have someting tangible. And that little flower
on the table, I don't think it there by accident. So what I would like you to do is take that today, and that rose represents this experience. Because
you need to have something tangible that we met, that she came through. This is very, very important that she knows you have that. That's important for
her. Did she go by three names? Don't say the names, but did she go by three names?
John: you know just because somebody is physically not here, that doesn't mean we don't get the opportunity to work through some of the issues you didn't
work through when they were here. So if you need to sit down and write a letter to your mom or a letter to your aunt or write a letter to your daughter-
any one of the people who have passed- to express and get out what you've been holding in for such a long time- it's not a bad thing. One thing you need
to realize is that if you were driving by yourself in a vehicle that maybe she never saw, and yet she can come here and talk about that fact that you have
it and she sees you driving it and the fact that you were joking about the directions and what she would say if she was here, that's their way of continuing
to let us know they're still connected to us. Those are the trivial, minute little details that validate the fact that they're still part of our lives.
They do still see what's happening with us. Let's say your daugher was still alive, and there was a different type of death- the death of the English language,
and your daughter was only able to speak in ancient Aramaic, what would you do?
Diane: I'd learn the language.
John: absolutely, you'd learn the language. That's how I want you to perceive this. Because she's still here, she's still connected to you. There's a different
type of communication that happening. It's the language of energy, and I do believe the seh'll send you little signs, and she'll send you acknowlegements,
and you might have a dream of her, you might have a feeling of her. But it's not something you should look for, because if you look for it, then you miss
it. If it happens and you're uncertain about it, acknowledge it in your mind: "Hey, I know you're here, i know you're trying, and thank you and keep up
the good work. I appreciate it."
Diane: Does she know how much her friends love her? They miss her so much.
MISSY, GINUWINE, TIMBALAND - close friends & colleages of Aaliyah
John: absolutely. One of the major things people always say during a sessions is: "Tell her that I love her." My answer to that is: "You just did". You
don't need to see a medium to connect with your daughter. Because the relationship is 365 days a year- and one day when the right time happens, you guys
will connect again. And when it's time for you to leave and you're done teaching and learning the lessons you need to learn here and you make that transition.
I'm positive that the people we love will be there to meet you. Positive! I have no doubt! I know it from doing this work. People come through ans say,
" I was met by so-and-so.: or "I was met by this one." or "I'm with these people". I hope this has helped you. I can still feel the very emotionally charged
situation in the connection with her. Just know she's okay, and you and your son will be okay too.
The energy pulled back and I sat back in my chair, both tired and curious. Who was this celebrity? " I'm freaking out here." I said to Natasha and Diane.
"You're going to tell me whos this person is now... right? "John", said Natasha, "it's the young, beautiful, and talented AALIYAH." Singer/actress Aaliyah
had died in plane crash on August 25, 2001 along with a group friends and co-workers, when taking off in a small plane in the Bahamas. She was en route
to New York after shooting a music video in the islands. Now it made perfect sense why she refused to tell me how she had died- not only would it have
given me a major clue as to who she was, which could have made my knowledge "shut down" ( I would have been self conscious throughout the reading and would
have known too much information from the get go), but also, I was getting on a plane early the next morning and I hate- I mean hate to fly.
Once I knew who Diane's daughter was, other pieces of the puzzle started to come together and I realized that this reading was indirectly connected to my
publicist Jill. A year and a half ago when it came time for me to pick someone to handle publicity after Crossing Over gained recgonition, I chose Jill
for a number of reasons. First she'd been to the studio several times with other celebrity clients who had come for a reading, and I was impressed with
how she looked after their interests and how kind yet super professional she always was. But after we'd had an official meeting together to see if we wanted
to wor together, I knew that there was another reason why i'd chosen her. I told our supervising producer Liz Arias and Carol my assistant that I felt
Jill needed to be connected to this work at this point in time- that it would help her. I wasn't sure what the reason was, and I didn't understand why
I fely that way but now I thought I knew the answer. Jill and I were leaving the Crossing Over studio to do our first satellite tv interview one day, and
on the way out of the building she told me that one of her clients had just passed - Aaliyah. That must have been what I was feeling when I first met her-
that she was going to be questioning life and death, her own mortality, and was grieving the death of someone close to her. This person must have been
her close friend Aaliyah.
When Jill first told me about Aaliyah, I offered to talk to the singer's family but it wasn't until now, a year and a half later that Diane felt she was
finally ready. I've often said that it's usually best for the people to get through the initial stages of grieving before they consult a medium. Mediumship
should never be a first option, because what if the person you want to connect woth doesn't show up? The trauma could exacerbate your grief. Up until Natasha
and I had arrived at the hotel, Diane was questioning her decision to get a reading- a fact tha came through in the session. As she explained to me afterward,
"I was in the hotel and I walked around by myself thinking, Should I do this? Does LiLi want me to do this? I knew she had avery strong belief in afterlife.
She had begun to talk about it quite a bit as she got older, and she had bought books on it, because she had the belief. And the reading really did help
me. It was amazing..there were so many parts that were so right on point. Some of the things you said were things that were so Aaliyah". said Diane, as
she pointed out the validations of the reading.
As soon as the "dominant" energy came through to me, even tough I thought it might be male, Diane knew it was her LiLi. "That was so on point", she says,
"because she was sweet, thoughtful, compassionate...but at the same time she had this strength that I was in awe of. I used to tell her, ' I think you
are a magnificent human being adnI am truly in awe of you.' And she'd say, "Really, Mom?" "When something went wrong she exhibited a strength that was
magnificent. And I truly looked up to her." The two of them were indeed good buddies. "There was nothing she couldn't say to me and nothing I couldn't
say to her", Diane remarked. "We talked about everything. She was my bestfriend. I would call her for advice! Who would think a 22 year old could give
me advice! But that's how she was."
What really hit home for Diane were the little intimate details that came through that only people close to her knew about. Like Aaliyah's pink clothes.
"The color pink, that was a color she began to like when she was about 18 years old. It was my mother's favorite color, and they were very close. All of
a sudden one day, I noticed she'd been wearing a lot of pink.... and I said ' LiLi you're liking pink now?' And she said "I don't know what it is ... maybe
it's Grandma!" Nobody really knew about this... maybe a couple of her close friends. For you to mention pink, it just hit me." Other private moments such
as Diane's lone visit to their favorite church also hit home. "Aaliyah and I used to go to St. Patrick's Cathedral when we'd go shopping in the city. We'd
be holding hands and we'd stop in there. A month after this happened, I went back to St. Patrick's alone, and I saw the priest and sat in on a service.
I was by myself trying to get some inner peace. And i've been there several times since."
Diane also has confirmed that she has a piece of music of Aaliyah's that no one else has. "She made an audition CD to get into the performing arts hgh school,
and she sang 'Ave Maria' in Latin. I found that Cd, and we played it at the memorial mass we did for her. That Cd is mine. No record company or anybody
has it... it's mine and it's awesome. It's just her with a piano accompaniment."
A reference that the family had wrtiten something about Aaliyah that was recently published was also true- "That was correct too, "acknowledged Diane. "
Rashad wrote an article on his sister for Teen Vogue called
'Little Sister Lost'
for the June 2002 issue. One word that came up a few times in the reading was classy, which Diane says described her beautiful daughter to a T. "She always
wanted to do things in a classy way" said Diane. "And that was how we always described her. And when you said she was the kind who lived without regrets,
that was so true, too. She would say, 'You know,, you can't live your life like that ... ya gotta do what you gotta do... what will ne, will be.' So when
you said that, it was almot like she was talking to me right there in the room. LiLi liked to live in the moment, and whatever that moment was she cherished
it, she embraced it, and she always said ' We have no cotrol. If something's going to happen, it going to happen." As Diane and I continued to talk after
the reading, some other validations started to emerge.. I realized that the parking lot reference was a validation directed toward me- I had parked in
that lot every day when I was workingat the studio nearby and remembered that there was a gigantic billboard for the movie Queen of the Damned, with Aaliyah's
face about 20 feet high next to the lot.. I couldn't help but see that billboard each day for months as I entered the studio. Diane also made the conection
for the male with the "W" name who appeared first in the meeting, bringing through her daughter.
he was on the plane with Aaliyah. I didn't get it at first. He was very close to us, and like an uncle to LiLi. That'swhy we weren't with her on this trip.
Because I had surgery and couldn't go, he took days off from work to go woth her. He said, 'Diane, since you can't go, I'll go." As our session came to
a close, Aaliyah's strong energy still lingered in the room. I saw a flash of an ethnic looking bracelet in my mind's eye.
"Diane", I asked, "where is the bracelet" Do you know if she had a scarab- an Egyptian bracelet?" Diane wasn't sure, although she did know that her daughter
had a lot of
jewelry. Diane's howework was to check on the bracelet as well as other information she didn't understand- such as the "B" name that I'd gotten. [ Diane
now believes that this might be her niece Blair, whose birthday is in April- this would refer back to April being significant and the "B" name.] Although
Diane's spirits seemed a little lighter then when we'd first shaken hands an hour earlier, I could still feel the high emotion of her loss.
"Sometimes it's all so unbearable", she said, softly weeping. "Some days I just want to....I'm in a daze. Yesterday I just walked in circles and cried my
heart out. It's hard to go on...." "That's a very human feeling, " I told her, "but you're still here because you've got stull you need to do. You have
to be the person to honor your daughter's memory. Because then people are really going to get a chance to understand who she is."
Before I departed the hotel- with Diane clutching the red rose as a memento- I left her with one last thought. "Diane, I want to be bold enough to tell
you this: Your daughter is larger than a plane crash. The plane crash happened in a minute but her life was a lot longer then that. You have to look at
everything she accomplished . And even though she did leave us physically, she's stille here; she's still connected to you. And the love you have for her
and the love she has for you is still very much here and alive." I reminded Diane that the most important thing for her to do now as to honor her grief-
to feel the pain so she could get back to feeling joy instead of pacing around her apartment and cutting herself off from life.
"Aaliyah is still connected to you and she's counting on you". I told her and all of us must remember this when we lose someone we love. Cry, then pick
yourself up bravely, because they're watching over us and hoping we'll do well during the rest of our years here, fulfilling whatever desting we have.
"And one day you will see her again," I told her." I promise...one day when the time is right, you will see your daughter again."
© February 2003