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Residents in the area of Utrecht, The Netherlands, have reported seeing a certain shady figure lurking about the local hospital. This individual is dressed in some sort of freakish doctors’ attire, including coat, stethoscope and a scalpel the size of a small sword. It’s rumored that he has been able to infiltrate the medical staff, referring to himself as ‘a new kind of medical expert’ called a ‘Beatdoctor’. All that is known so far is that he goes about the hospital, indiscriminately prescribing unhealthy doses of cinematic, dark and melancholic hip-hop beats to unsuspecting patients. When confronted with these reports, the medical staff has been quick to distance itself from the practices of this shadowy individual, describing his brand of medicine as ‘unusual’, ‘evocative’, and in some cases even ‘dangerous’. The point of his experimental treatments, and the side-effects they might have for his test subjects have seen rampant speculation from keen observers in the field. Now it seems his plans can finally be revealed…

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