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BATTLECRUISER
Religious / Minimalist / Metal

		"NEW WAVE OF BAD-ASS HEAVY METAL" Wellington New Zealand Profile Views: 7375 Last Login: 6/20/2008
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BATTLECRUISER: General Info

Member Since	7/16/2007
Band Members	BLACK BONED ANGEL 'Eternal Hunger' 'Eternal Love' 'Heavens Blaze With The Death Of Princes' 'Dashed Upon Stones' angels roll up the corners of the world at 2kph BIRCHVILLE CAT MOTEL 'Bird Sister Blasphemy "got it bad, got it bad, got it bad... i'm hot for teacher" DEVOID OF ALL MERCY 'Your Children Left With The Stranger' kiddy-fiddling folk-metal GHOUL 'Raping Soul' emaciated electro-doom MING 'The Kill' a time-truncating wall of hatred MIRAG 'Black Temple Carved In Smoke' interstellar power-blackness MRTYU! 'The Burning Ground' ash-hewn tantric cremators THE COPS a soundtrack for japanese train suicides WINGS OF VENGEANCE 'Miseryguts' beer-inspired inept-core WARDAGGER 'Waste' so depressed they have to play lying down! YOU SHOULD HAVE SLAIN ME 'You Should Have Slain Me' profoundly autistic
Record Label	http://www.birchville.sphosting.com/index.htm
Type of Label	None

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BIRCHVILLE CAT MOTEL
'Birds Sister Blasphemy'
compact disc $12nz

Oh dear Lord... NO! Just when the heavy meds were kicking in and I was beginning to think there might be some kinda universal point to all this working and eating and sleeping, Birchville Cat Motel re-adjusts the good/evil ratio back. Thanks. No really, thanks a lot. You'll no doubt be as delighted as I am to hear this is NOT the new Black Boned Angel album, in fact Mr Cat Motel himself told me this has "more to with W.A.S.P, 'Kill Em All' styled too-tight denim, and big white sneakers than the ceremonial pre-historicism of the current neo-doom movement". PRE-HISTORICISM?! What a dick. These prowling, growling eruptions of frantic thrash'o'delia will surely attract babes like a burning tyre scented aftershave. Is that a twin guitar solo in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?

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DEVOID OF ALL MERCY
'Your Children Left With The Stranger'
compact disc $12nz

EEeew. As the positively revolting title might suggest to some of you who are alert and paying attention, this release is a veritable shrine to perverted, in-bred, hillbilly atrocity. Misanthropic to a degree I previously thought impossible, this is quite simply the BLACKEST of folk/horror-inspired black metal (or should I say black metal inspired, horror-folk?) with an unbelievably high 'Deliverance' factor. Think rusty pickup trucks and cages in the basement. Think pathetic whimpering death. Sounds like the house in 'The Blair Witch Project' or the forest in 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre' or maybe the sledgehammer in 'Misery'... I feel strangely compelled to shower. Again and again.

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MIRAG
'Black Temple Carved In Smoke'
compact disc $12nz

Urgh, my aching head! The 'apparently very mighty' Matthew Bower wrinkles up the spacetime continuum in car-sickness inducing fashion... cleaving a hole through my frontal lobe and transmogrifying my spindley legs to boneless black jelly. The asphyxiating riffs just keep coming and coming, turning all to darkness, daaaaarkness... no escape, NO ESCAAAAPE! AAAAargh... argh... urrrh. Right before I passed out I had a split-second vision of a neon-pink Blackie Lawless telling me his band was "back and stronger than ever!". I thought I had either died and gone to some kinda cat-piss stinky heaven or I was doomed to spend eternity in a gothic girls wardrobe. The most frightening thing this one-man behemoth has ever committed to tape. NO ESCAAA-AAA-AAAPE...

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BLACK BONED ANGEL
'Eternal Hunger'
compact disc $12nz

SORRY, SOLD OUT... ABOUT TO BE REISSUED ON VINYL LP ALONG WITH 'ETERNAL LOVE' EP ON RIOT SEASON (UK)

If once every thousand years a monk licks a mountain... I guess EVENTUALLY it will become a pebble. Although I'd prefer to drink my own spew rather than wait around for this to actually happen, the idea seems rather more attractive than being locked in an enclosed space with a candle-snuffer like 'Eternal Hunger'. "Any band whose shows turn to custard after their morbidly-obese bottom-end blasts their own power plugs out of the wall, should be be strictly avoided" seems like a sensible proverb that all good people who refuse to eat small children should attempt to live by. A sickening seismic rupture of unplumbed magnitude as the angels roll up the four corners of the earth at a top speed of 2kph. The floors are swept, the lights are turned out, and God goes home. I'll stick with my bargain-bin Bolt Thrower cassettes... chow down little monk!

ALL PRICES ARE QUOTED IN $NZ

POSTAGE: $7NZ for 1st item, $2NZ each additional item

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BATTLECRUISER has 442 friends.

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BATTLECRUISER's Friends Comments

Displaying 50 of 56 comments ( View All | Add Comment )

BLUES HORROR BRIGADE	Jul 14 2008 9:10 AM THANK YOU FOR BEING FRIENDS ON THIS GODFORSAKEN PLANET.
GUNSLINGERS (No More Invention Available)	Jul 13 2008 4:57 PM .. .. .... .. ..
Winepress Records	Jun 17 2008 5:07 PM
Svartgalgh Records	May 30 2008 4:39 PM
RUIN INTO REST (coming soon)	May 26 2008 9:15 AM
Hyperblasted Recordings	May 22 2008 7:17 AM
Demian Johnston	May 15 2008 7:51 PM it just keep getting better.thanks for doing good work.
Corubo	May 9 2008 10:17 AM
Uwe	May 7 2008 3:09 PM
Svartgalgh Records	Apr 28 2008 2:28 PM
Fedora Corpse Recordings	Apr 16 2008 5:24 PM The world needs more -You Should Have Slain Me!!!-
Winepress Records	Apr 15 2008 7:30 AM thanks for checking out our new home. nate
Deus Ignotus	Apr 15 2008 5:50 AM
El Schlong	Apr 15 2008 1:14 AM
h8 no.3	Apr 4 2008 8:44 PM
Svartgalgh Records	Mar 21 2008 3:05 PM Coming up soon: OUROBOROS (Italian ambient) and more MAGICK RITUALS project 3” CDR’s, featuring amongst others CTEPHIN, CALIGINOUS and TRAUERSPIEL. You can still apply for the MAGICK RITUALS by the way! It turns out to be quite a fantastic project! And there will be more, for the dark never sleep… All releases on 3” CDR format. Only € 4 each (excl. p&p). Check out the myspace for samples and ordering info! Want to contribute to the MAGICK RITUALS? Contact us!!! Thanks for your support! Sv.
Svartgalgh Records	Feb 26 2008 4:12 PM Hailz! Just out: a bunch of new releases! From dark ambient to desolate black metal! Coming soon: RABENVOLK (satanic black) and the MAGICK RITUALS project double 3” CDR’s. For which you can still apply! It will be a monstrous project! Thanks for your support! Sv.
"GRIMMWØLFF"	Feb 26 2008 10:09 AM Thanks for the post!
Svartgalgh Records	Feb 15 2008 10:07 AM
Svartgalgh Records	Feb 14 2008 12:16 PM
SUBURBAN LEPROSY	Jan 15 2008 11:59 PM GREETS FROM SUBURBAN LEPROSY! NZ METAL = CORE!!!! ALL THE BEST
CONAN	Jan 4 2008 5:09 AM GUYS CHECK OUT THE VIDS FROM OUR FIRST SHOW ON OUR PAGE. CONAN.
Patush	Nov 22 2007 5:05 AM Greetings From Patush
GHÄST	Nov 17 2007 7:01 AM
panoptic transience	Oct 25 2007 1:26 PM
CRAME	Oct 16 2007 4:25 AM
APOP RECORDS	Oct 7 2007 7:52 AM Dying for a new Wardagger release
The Dukes Of Leisure	Oct 2 2007 1:33 PM
panoptic transience	Oct 1 2007 6:19 AM
BLACK BONED ANGEL	Sep 23 2007 4:39 PM Shot at 2007-09-23
MONARCH!	Aug 7 2007 5:08 AM Killer label! Killer bands!
N:OORT	Aug 6 2007 3:27 PM Thx for the add. GREAT albums! Keep up the good noise. N:OORT
The Insect Explosion	Jul 28 2007 5:16 PM hi. The Flies
Ghostly Rural Ensemble	Jul 27 2007 9:55 AM Devoid of All Mercy is so disturbingly visual that i feel sick sometimes. And the new Birchville Cat Motel is demolishing my home since last week. Thank you. Much respect from México! Ivan
Industrie Chimere Noire	Jul 24 2007 6:45 PM I like your albums artwork/visual concept...very simple...but it got a lot of punch and personnality... keep up the good work... J. dark graphics provider www.chimerenoire.com
Drummer Michael	Jul 24 2007 6:25 PM cheers! i love the smell of doom in the morning...
WITCH-LORD	Jul 22 2007 11:38 AM Hey Brother! Thanks for your continuous support! We are back on track and ready to slay! Got some new shit on the way and we would still love to be a part of The BATTLECRUISER family! FUCK THE WEAK SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! B A T T E L C R U I S E R I S S I C K !!!!!!!!!
Agonhymn	Jul 19 2007 7:17 PM That's some tasty taste.
MRTYU!	Jul 19 2007 6:30 PM Neither ash nor bone Once the light hath departed.
DOOM RADIO	Jul 19 2007 12:18 AM Thanks for the add!! Can't wait to hear the material! Mike

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