Crazy Bearded Jack

About me:

I was a renowned spinal surgeon working at one of the top hospitals in Los Angeles - you may have heard of it, St. Sebastian? Yeah, well, after I graduated from Columbia AND UCLA Med School (a year early) I took the job there. One day I told a women with a shattered spine I would save her, even though it looked grim. I did my best, I even allowed another guy (who I could have easily saved mind you) to die! After that I was really depressed and decided to go run some stadium stairs. While I was there I ran into this British guy who gave me a little pep talk about miracles, then told me he'd "See me in another life, brotha." ..

Anyway, upon returning to the hospital I discovered that the surgery was a success, and the British guy was right. I ended up marrying the woman I saved and everything was great, but I'm just the kind of guy who always needs something to fix. After kissing a really hot Italian chick, I found out my wife was leaving me. Huge blow! And she wouldn't even tell me who for! I'm sure I'm going to find out though...

Well, my life was rough after that. My alcoholic father tried to console me, but I accused him of fucking my wife. That strained our relationship. But not as much as when I caught him operating drunk, and he ended up letting a pregnant woman die. Jack does not put up with that shit! I turned him in, he lost his license, and he went to Australia.

I bounced around for awhile after that, dated an Asian bitch, got a traditional tattoo, you know. Well, one day I get a call that my father is dead in Australia, and my mom wants me to go pick him up. I go there to get his body, but they won't let me take it back on the plane. I talk them into it, and we're off.

I didn't count on the plane crashing on a mysterious Island that has metaphysical powers and causes everyone to hallucinate. I became the de facto leader, we moved from the beach, to the caves, then back to the beach. Then we found that hatch. I spent a whole fucking season in that god damned thing - but I did see that British guy again, Desmond. I guess he was right. Something tells me he has some sort of ESP or something.

After spending about 60 days there of increasingly weird happenings, we ran into "The Others" who needed me to do - what else - a spinal surgery on their leader. I did it, but not before attempting to kill him to save my friends (although I had just caught Sawyer banging Kate, which did not make me happy). I saved them and they got back to the Island. A strange woman named Naomi landed on the Island, and said she came from a freighter that was about 90 miles off-shore.

When I tried to talk everyone into going with me to get to the freighter and get off the Island, this crazy dude John Locke killed Naomi and split the camp in two. That guy does not want off the Island. I think he even blew up the submarine that was going to take me home. Well, the freighter people came, but they weren't there for the reasons we thought.

So, as we waited for the freighter, I started feeling shitty. Turns out my appendix was about to burst. Juliet took it out (while I was awake!...for the beginning at least). But you know me, I'm not one to stay down, and I went after the chopper that dropped us a satellite phone. We tracked the chopper and found Lapidus. He promised to take us off the Island, but we had to get Hurley, and Sawyer and I went after him. While we were there, we ran into Locke. He told me he had to move the Island, and he wanted me to say. He said a miracle was about to happen. I told him, "There's not such thing." Boy was I wrong.

So, we got to the boat....and it fucking exploded. Obviously we needed to go back to the Island....which, before our eyes, disappeared under water. So, Locke was right. And I was wrong. Man of Faith 1, Man of Science 0. As Locke told me (before I believed him) we had to lie. We came up with a long story about how were stranded until we finally made it to Membata. Not really true - kind of - but not especially.

So we made it back. In a coast guard plane. I was glad to see my mom, and happy to be home. It had been a long, long journey. But what I didn't know was that it was no where close to over.

I had to testify at Kate's trial that she was the one who saved everyone, not me, and that she's the hero. Well, after the trial I decided that maybe Kate and I should give it a go, you know, for Aaron's sake. She says I'm a natural with him. Then we had my dad's funeral. As if that wasn't hard enough, I found out that I had a half-sister - Claire. Yeah, that Claire. Meaning Aaron is my nephew. And she, as I said, "Is not even related to him."

But then a strange thing happened. First, I thought I saw my dad in the lobby of the office. About the same time, I got a message that Dr. Stillman at Santa Rosa Mental Facility wanted to talk to me. I went there to see Hurley, and he told me he'd been talking to Charlie. Weird. Then he told me that he had a message for me - "You're not supposed to raise him Jack." I needed to get that out of my head, so I went home and proposed to Kate. She said yes, and I thought maybe that I would be cool

So after all that, I was working late one night, going over an X-Ray with a tumor in the L-4 vertabrae (yeah, I know, coincidence?) and I heard a smoke detector going off. I went out to the lobby, and for the second time that day I saw my DEAD FATHER. WHAT THE FUCK? I had one of my co-workers write me a clonazapam prescription. Kate and I hadn't been getting along lately, and I hoped it would help. But instead I've just kind of turned into a crazy pill popper, and the reality of thing are finally starting to hit me.

Well, last night I finally did it, something I'd needed to do. I went to Hoffs/Drawler funeral parlor. I needed some closure. I opened the casket and there he was...Jeremy Bentham. All of a sudden Ben appeared. I knew he was off the Island, but I didn't expect him there. Well, from what Bentham told me, a lot of bad things happened after I left the Island, and that they were all my fault. Ben says that we all need to go back, including Mr. Bentham...or should I say John Locke