Yoga especially anusara. Modernism especially architecture, especially in the desert. Recalibrating DNA. Slowing down the news cycle while finding out what's really going on. Replacing fear with love. Anything that explains my inexplicable feeling that The World Is So Exciting Right Now (TWISERN).
I need a lot of quiet time lately. So music: tuning forks, the sound bath at the Integretron in Joshua Tree. Tingsas, gongs. Everything is vibration. I'm working on taking that in. Govindaas, beautiful chants. Shiva Baba, the chant to remove all negativity. I like to sing Joni Mitchell songs in the privacy of my own studio. But sometimes a girl has to rock instead of roll. Peaches. Janis. Slater Kinney. etc.
Movies
Moulin Rouge, Philadelphia Story, Midnight Cowboy, Little Miss Sunshine, Ed Wood, Wizard of Oz, Apocalypse Now, Across The Universe, Popeye, Nashville, Hail, Hail Rock and Roll, Uncle Buck, Magnolia. Currently enjoying the DVD extra commenntaries especially by writers/directors/producers. Simpsons Movie. Infamous (the other Truman Capote movie).I like to watch the moon.
Currently disconnected. But when we were connected and if we do reconnect and for future seasons that i will netflix or download: No procedurals. No insects. No medical. Minimal gunplay. Project Runway, My So Called Life, Sex & The City, Flip This House, Property Ladder, Taken, The Simpsons, Invasion, Roseanne, Minor Accomplishments of Jackie Woodman, Comeback, W&G, Larry Sanders, Freaks and Geeks, The L Word.
Books
The Language of The Birds by William Henry, Cosmic Serpent/Narby, Intention Experiment Lynne McTaggert, Sitchin, Hancock, Sri Siva, Franny and Zooey, Be Here Now, Jane's Blanket, An American Tragedy, I Ching, Three Lives, Member of The Wedding, The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali, Ulysses, Wheels of Life, The Mists of Avalon, Diary of a Psychic, The Possible and The Actual, Dune.
Heroes
There was this girl in the hospital when I was five, in a wheelchair, and one day I was in bed (actually I usually wasn't) doing a paint by number. The nurse had said don't spill the paint, so of course I did, and this girl in the wheel chair totally cleaned it up, with total grace and good spirits. She was never going to be able to walk and there she was cleaning up after me. Superman always sort of paled.
Free Range Comedy Seminar Sunday June8th 1-3 MBar 1253 N. Vine, Hollywood CA, This seminar is free but please RSVP to info@uncabaret.com.
Next session of my Un-Cab Lab Writing & Performance Workshop session begins Sunday April 20th. You can audit any class for 10 bucks or sign up for the next session starting February 24th. For more info call 323-993-3305 or visit my website
"100% HAPPY 88% OF THE TIME" is my new, possibly inspirational, power-point presentation that puts forward a more convenient truth about our world now. I cover DNA, love, and the latest news from the galactic center. Oh, and also how to be happy!
323-993-3305 for more info.
I am the creator of the world famous UN-CABARET Un-Cabaret has been called: "A comedy be-in!" (Rolling Stone), "Consistently brilliant super-now comedy!" (LA Weekly) and "Liberating!" (Entertainment Weekly). Every show is different as the best minds in comedy put aside their 'act' and talk about what's really on their minds. 323-993-3305 or visit uncabaret.com for tickets and info.
Some nice things people say about me and my book, "Did I Wake You? Haiku's For Modern Living":
"A unique stand up theater artist"
HOLLYWOOD REPORTER
"A breath of fresh air, funny, witty, enlightening!"
WHOLE LIFE TIMES
"If you never imagined that you could laugh with and be intrigued by a book of poetry, now is the time to reconsider...boisterous, subtle and probing...lively, full of playfulness and pitch-perfect perception of modern living...humor, surprises and moments of sharp insight, especially when the poems touch on politics." THE FEMINIST REVIEW
"Brilliant, inspired, fun!!"
LA WEEKLY
"This is currently my favorite book of all time. It addresses the big picture, the little picture, and everything else in between in the most wonderfully wise and witty way."
BRUCE ERIC KAPLAN (cartoonist for the New Yorker, author of "no One You Know", "This is a Bad Time" and Executive Producer of "Six Feet Under".)
"Sublime."
KXLU
"It's like your funniest punk rock girlfriend decided to write haiku! Beth Lapides rocks!" GREG BEHRENDT (author of "He's Just Not That Into You", host of the Greg Behrendt Show)
"She's got a mike and she knows how to use it!"
LOS ANGELES TIMES
"Hilarious"
TIME OUT LONDON
"Books by Soft Skull Press look great in terms of production; they're also a lot of fun to actually read. Straddling the genres of humor, self-help and haiku, Beth Lapides' Did I Wake You? is drawing much attention for its inspirational power, even if much of her work seems deeply personal. Punk rock yet approachable, Lapides is a commentator for NPR's All Things Considered, and her writing has been called everything from "quick-shit lit" to "haikuzzi". We could keep going, but it's better if you just buy the book yourself."
TUSCON WEEKLY
"Seriously funny!"
LOS ANGLES MAGAZINE
"The book splits the atoms of your psyche! Hip and hilarious. Beth Lapides is to haiku what a swizzle stick is to a very dry, funny cocktail."
MICHAEL PATRICK KING (Executive Producer/Writer/Director of "Sex and the City", "The Comeback")
"A master comedienne."
LOS ANGELES TIMES
"FOUR STARS (Highest Rating). One of the Top Ten Best Books of 2006. The quintessential example of good things coming in small packages. A highly unique little gem, packed with wisdom, truth, humor, and delicious absurdity. Beth Lapides has a delightfully intelligent comic mind."
CBS RADIO
"Funny, surprising, inspirational, world-conscious, and deeply personal. Beth manages to dust poetry off and plug it in, making it exciting and relevant to the world today!" SATELLITE SISTER - ABC/XM Radio
"Beth Lapides puts the English language on a high-protien diet and it emerges sleeker, skinnier and funnier. In seventeen no-fat syllables, Lapides strikes to the heart of California, celebrity and the curses of our age."
STEPHEN GLASS (author of "The Fabulist")
There are a lot of really entertaining poems here, several which I found really meaningful. I had to admire Lapides's skill at conveying so much, so well, in so few words. It even compelled me to write my own haiku. But I'm not sure they'll ever be seeing the light of day - it's a lot harder than it looks. Rating: 4 out of 5!"
TRASHIONISTA.COM
"Beth Lapides is
a haiku genius. I'm ser-
ious, check her out!"
MOON ZAPPA(author of "America The Beautiful")
"But Beth's wit is sharp,
sketching showbiz, life, time, love:
funny, poignant ... real"
LA CITY BEAT
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Who I'd like to meet: Seekers, readers, laughers, lovers, yogans and yoganinis, coffee drinkers, dreamers, haikuers, indigos, free thinkers, bravehearts, metadreamers, fear grid rejecters, consciousness enthusiasts, energetic scholars, intentionary masters, mistresses of time bending, awakeners, cultural creatives, life artists, what iffers, changeaholics, bright eyes, indigos.
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Hi Beth: Just wanted to stop in and wish you a very Happy Birthday! Did you get the photo of you and Kevin Nealon that I sent you? Best regards, Michael Schwartz
