Top 11 Reasons to Sleep with a Stuntrider
11. because no matter how nice it is, we still like to hammer down on it
10. Because no one likes a guy that cant get it up!!
9. Because they know where all the good spots are!!
8. Because they can play for hours and still not get bored!!
7. Because they never stop learning new tricks!!
6. Because they get their best ideas from the videos they watch!!
5. Because they always wear protection!!
4. Because no matter how hard it is, they never stop trying!!
3. Because your boyfriend envies them!!
2. Because they dont care about make, model, year, shape or color!!
1. Because they know how to multi-task like a mother fu*ker!!
Television
YOU MIGHT BE A STUNTER IF?
1) After a crash the first thing you ask is" did someone get that on tape".
2) Your living room dubs as winter storage and a repair facility.
3) You have a weekly budget for cycle repairs.
4) Your idea of perfect plastics means that some of the tabs are still there.
5) The people at Joann Fabrics know you by name.
6) You would rather ride then get laid
7) You have a million parts bikes but only one bike that barley runs
8) To you laying your bike down means parking it
9) You live by 3 letters, F.T.P.
10) Your idea of a perfect bike is one that has already been wrecked
11) A truck has to follow you "just in case"
12) You have a ticket collection you are proud to display
13) Your idea of a new tire is one that dosent have cords showing
14) Your sprocket is as big as your rim ....almost
Books
Rules for female passengers.
1. If you have no bike but just happen to have your own helmet in your car we know your playing us for a ride.
2. If your going to go for a ride go with the nicest bike he's the one who is least likely to crash and kill you. If he has a nice bike he's probably been ridding a while. If you go with a tool who has a 86 ninja 250 we are all going to laugh at you.
Plus use your head if his bike looks broke then so is he DUHHH!
3. If the bike is a "Stunt bike" or rashed up all over reconsider there is a reason its rashed up.
4. If you're FAT! Save yourself some embarrassment and save us the aggravation of trying to tell you no with out saying cuz "YOU'RE FAT BITCH!!!! We can only be sooo nice. Use your head.
5. If your friend is ugly or FAT (See rule 4) it is not my responsibility to get someone to take her.
6. If you have on a skirt then YES!!! We have to go first. No one else knows how to get where we are going... (Right guys?)
7. Showing your nice tits will get you selected first for a bike ride.
8. STOP!!!!! Fucking bashing your Pep-Boys helmet into the back of my $600 custom helmet... thank you!
9. Move back and stick your ass out... your squishing my nuts.
10. Stop scratching my tank with your fake J-Lo ring set.
11. Yes it is too possible to jerk me off while I'm riding my bike, rubbing gently works too... (Note: This will also ensure you another bike ride anytime)
12. It is customary to pay for motorcycle rides with oral sex.
(NOTE: If your skills aren't up to par it is definitely ok to have a girlfriend of yours assist you. Team work is what it's all about.
)
13. We know when a girl likes the bike and not us. If every time we call it's always the same shit can we go on the bike....
NO!!!!..... It's fucking March bitch.
14. Don't lean this bike has one driver and it's me. So sit there and relax.
15. No you're not going to "GO FLYING RIGHT OFF" (Unless you piss me off then it's a possibility.
)
16. Yes I'm going to go fast... stop being a pussy.
17. Yes I just adjusted my mirrors to see your tits.
18. When we stop at a gas station, you are not guarenteed a return trip. Know your role and maybe you get dropped off close to where you were found.
Heroes
SEX POEM
Roses are red
Lemons are sour
Open ur legs and give me an hour
Kissing Is A Habit
Fucking Is A Game
Guys Get All The Pleasure
Girls Get All The Pain
10 Minutes Of Pleasure
9 Months Of Pain
3 Days In The Hospital
A Baby Without A Name
The Father Is A Bastard
The Mother Is A Whore
This Woulda Never Happend If The Rubber Hadn't Tore!!
Sex is like math
You subtract the clothes
Add the bed
Divide the legs
And Pray to god
You dont multiply
Roses are red
Grass is green
Open your legs
And I'll fill you with cream
Sex is good
Sex is fine
Doggy Style & 69
Just for fun
Or gettin paid
Everyone likes gettin laid
Stunt Poem
Spinnin circles, all day long
Bound to slip, Bound to fall.
But if we fall, have no fear
we'll lift that bike ,And smack them gears.
And as we wheelie , to the sky
were free and happy , aint no lie.
Well ride them lots ,And hit those streets
roll them stoppies , and make our beats.
we'll clutch it up , into the nights
when were done , well park our bikes.
now as we wait , well hang and laugh
and talk about , our stunting past.
well grab our gear , go out and ride
and stunt our bikes, until we die.
About me: My Name Is JEREMY BLOCK aka Cream Cheese
Dear Lord, watch over me and my family of XTREME FURY STUNTERZ as we go into the streets, protect us from the four wheeled demons, make us seen so we will not have our life taken by someone not paying attention, keep us from harm, let it be known, "we are coming" watch over us as we wheelie down the highways, forgive us for the laws that we break for it is only out of fun that we do so and not to harm anyone Dear lord, please protect the police and highway patrol in their pursuit to uphold the law, give me the courage to accept the penalties for my own actions, watch over the injured or sick and help them to a speedy recovery, we know that we are unworthy of all the gifts that you give us, but we pray these things in your name, AMEN
alright buddy yea ill let ya know and i didn't get the last digit in the number.
what im trying to do is to have a ride in the morning meet up around 1130 or 12 then come back do a stunt show have $1 beers and food and working on a buddy of mine has a clothing brand to come up put on a tent sale....
what's up bro? greetings from mexico how have you been? When you come to mexico? You are welcome in mexico Your you are my idol You are very good at the stunt stunt4ever my English is bad
AYE WHATS GOOD? THANX 4 THE ADD!! JUST DROPPING BY TO SHOW YOUR PAGE SOME LOVE. MY NAMES K-SO, IMA UNDERGROUND RAP ARTIST TRYNA GET MY MUSIC OUT & HEARD COULD YOU PLEASE CHECK OUT MY TRACKS.. & DROP A PAGE COMMENT ON WHAT YOU THINK? THANKS; I APPRECIATE IT. ALSO, I'LL BE GETTiNG NEW TRACKS UP SOON, SO KEEP A LOOKOUT ON MY PAGE FOR THEM :) K-SO TREY MAFIA PRODUCTIONS
