I’ve always liked the phrase big girl to describe those of us who live past the plus-size dividing line that separates “normal” women from us big, fat freaks. Big girl was always something I heard in the Black community used with affection (go ‘head, big girl, work it out!) or awe (now, that’s a biiiiiiiiiiig girl) but never with contempt in the way “fat” gets used in American culture as a universal insult.
For the record, I think fat should be used as an adjective, the same way tall or young or brown-eyed is used. It’s a physical description, and it doesn’t have to be a bad thing. It’s all in the association. If someone calls me a fat bitch, I’m offended. But if someone calls me that hot fat chick, I’m like, “Well duh! About time somebody recognized that!”
So, who’s fat? Who’s a big girl? It all depends on your point of view. Words like “big” and “fat” are all a matter of context. (So is “normal”—don’t get me started on what the real norm is for American women! Don’t believe the hype!) Big is in the eye of the beholder. I lost 40 pounds and my friend A. tells me, “Pretty soon you’re gonna have to stop calling yourself a big girl.” He might be right. In some people’s minds, at a size 14/16, I am not a big girl at all. But then again, in the eyes of others, I’m huuuuuuuuuge.
I figure as long as I’m buying my jeans in the Woman section of Macy’s, my shirts in Torrid, and my panties at Lane Bryant, I get to claim the big girl world as my territory. Notice I said “get to” not “have to.” The big girls I know are all such wild and outrageous and gorgeous and fabulous women that I consider it an honor to stride by chunky self right along beside them.
Do I have my moments of wishing for thinness? I’d be an MFing liar if I said I never, ever longed for a flatter belly or a chance to shop in any store. But damn. This is who I am today. This is the body I have today. If I started right now putting my full energy towards losing weight, it would take a year before I hit the weight I’m “supposed” to be. Who wants to put life on hold for a year trying to do all that? I’d probably just end up looking like one of those amusement park caricature drawings with a tiny body and a gigantic head. Add my big hair to that and I’d just be a walking cartoon. I’d rather stay my lush, voluptuous self, thank you very much. On those days when I wish I could walk through life in a smaller package, I just have to flip the switch to “fake it ‘til you can make it” mode and pretend I’m supercute the way I am until I start to believe it again. I figure if even some of the most beautiful women in the world suffer from I’m-so-ugly-days, me having one is no sign that I’m caving in to the beauty myth, betraying all my big girl friends, and trading in my fat feminist card. I’m just having a moment. I’ll get back to loving me.
And that’s what Big Girl Pride is all about, really. Loving me! Loving you!
It’s not about hating on the skinny girls, or belittling the men who struggle with weight stuff, too. But this is a Big Girl Space. If you enter it, you enter in knowing that in this world, fat is where it’s at. This is our space to be our chunky but funky, plump and pretty, big beautiful selves.
So, welcome to the world of Big Girl Pride. Because life is bigger than a number on a scale!
Who I'd like to meet:
Everyone who is respectful of and supportive of Big Girls is welcome here!
You have surely heard about the tragic death of a brave young woman who was murdered in Iran just for peacefully protesting with her father on the streets of Teheran.
Join Us at the 2009 NAAFA Fashion Show & Auction Dinner
Enjoy plus-size fashions at their best while you help support and celebrate 40 years of size acceptance advocacy efforts at the 2009 NAAFA Fashion Show on July 31, 2009!
This year Washington DC will take its place as the leading plus-size fashion capital of the world as we bring you the NAAFA 2009 Fashion Show & Auction Dinner being held on Friday, July 31, 2009, at the Dulles Airport Marriott. NAAFA is the world's oldest, largest civil rights organization working to improve the lives of people of size. We turn forty years old this year and are going strong with the strength we need to build a new future. This major fund raising event for our organization will feature food, fashion, music and our well known Not-So-Silent Auction.
Plus size fashion designers from around the country will present their latest collections of inspired designs. These talented designers have a sincere desire to see women return to the truth within themselves as expressed through what they wear, giving women of any age and size the opportunity to be truly fabulous. We are happy to announce that we have award winning makeup artist, Maisie Dunbar, to assist our volunteer model participants with their makeup and hair stylists from Paul Mitchell The School Virginia to finish their looks.
Be sure to bring your wallets, checkbooks and credit cards as we will showcase vendors of fashion, accessories and furniture--all catering to the plus size audience.
The event begins with dinner at 7pm on Friday, July 31, 2009. Tickets to this exciting fund raising event are $75 each for the entire fashion-filled evening and may be purchased through July 26, 2009 online by going to http://www.naafaonlin
Check out the "NEW & First Of It's Kind" ONLINE & LIVE Model Diva Showcase Competitions! It's going to be sooo much fun. There's a category for all curvaceous women out there...and if you don't find a category you fit in to....let us know and if there's a demand we will add it to this or future competitions! Round 1: Online Voting Scheduled for March 23, 2009 (ENTER TODAY!!!). Go to http://www.plussizepower.com/MODELDIVA_COMPETITION/RulesandCategories.html for more details. To Enter Go To: http://www.plussizepower.com/MODELDIVA_COMPETITION/Entry_Form.html ......and Tell All Your Plus Size Female Friends!
It's your turn to shine in 2009!
