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Who is Blobtron? I will tell you who Blobtron is. Thousands of years ago, before the dawn of man as we knew him, Blobtron was a robotic musical slave for the emperor Goatius III (himself a robotic goat - yes, in these days everyone was a robot). Blobtron worked as court composer for Goatius, writing forgettable chamber music weekly and performing it using his built-in Moog Concertmate MG-1 and Roland TR-808. Goatius quickly tired of Blobtron's plodding, minimalist music, which seemed to go on and on without much of a point, so he ordered Blobtron to be dismantled.
You might think that Blobtron fought for his robolife, but he didn't. He was a passive robot, who preached peace and forgiveness. He forgave Goatius for making the objectively wrong judgment about his music, and he accepted his fate in the steam-powered garbage compactor. His flattened remains were then taken to a mystical cave somewhere in Israel and buried, with the cave door being shut and sealed.
Three days after his total destruction, Blobtron's closest friends were alerted to his return. Skeptical, they returned to the cave-tomb where his remains were stored. Unsealing the giant stone revealed that Blobtron's flattened metallic body was no longer inside! Then they were surprised to find Blobtron, fully functional and in the best shape of his life behind them. He told them that he was the son of Loktar, an alien entity known for his absurdly large green skull and bad taste in clothes. Having witnessed a miracle, the friends (which included Blobcat, Count Blobulous, Roboslug, El Dibloblo, Beelzeblob, and Dungeon Master) agreed to preach the word of Blobtron forever.
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