Brian Whitaker
Per pubblico adulto / Humour / Cabaret
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http://www.craveonline.com/articles/humor/04651982/is_this_thing_on_brian_whitaker.html
Uomo
30 anni
Los Angeles, CA
Stati Uniti
Ultimo accesso: 03.12.2009
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Brian Whitaker: Biografia attore
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| Biografia | Brian has lived in the LA area for the bulk of his young life. Brian finds "clean" humor offensive to the intellect of someone who lives on the planet Earth. Brian may seem angry, but he’s really a cuddly teddy bear disguised as some white guy. Brian just realized it’s funny that he’s supposed to write a bio that’s meant to sound like somebody else wrote it, as if he’s so fucking important that someone would write a bio about him before he even kills himself to fool people into thinking he’s a genius. Brian will likely never add a thing to this section even if (Christ forbid) he ends up a household name, due to how ridiculous the idea of it suddenly is to him. Brian’s going to go now (and write in another little section of his myspace page that’s really like an extension of the damn bio -- Brian is just shaking his head right now. | | Influenze | My friends, every unpretty comic who spent their whole act making fun of how silly they look, every fat lady who only talked about raunchy sex for a "you go, girl!" instead of just losing some weight and coming up with real material, every self-loathing shithead who based their act on being mean over funny to prove how fucking "edgy" they are, every jerkoff who stopped to preach a blatantly PC message to the crowd for a cheap applause, every idiot who made un-PC jokes and then pointed out to us how un-PC they are so we would get that they are groundbreaking... basically people who made me laugh and then people who made me go "dammit, gimme that fucking mic, retard" and got me up off my judgmental ass. Love and respect for all of you (except the ones who steal jokes). | | Spettacoli TV | Blind Date, 5th Wheel, Three's a Crowd (with Alan Thicke! ALAN THICKE!!!!) Fuck sitcoms. | | Film | "Starslyderz" (Lovejoy) www.starslyderz.com
"Episode Zero: The Phantom Premiere" (Walter Walter) www.episode0.com | | Album | height="370" bgcolor="FFFFFF"type="application/x-shockwave-flash" pluginspage="http://www.macromedia.com/go/getflashplayer" flashvars="file=http://www.ijoke.tv/file/video/js/phpjava/playlist.php?v=122369452431&autostart=false&width=450&height=370&logo=http://www.ijoke.tv/file/video/images/videowatermark.png" scale="showall" name="index" /> |
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Brian Whitaker: Interessi
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| Generale | Comedy, writing, travel (even driving down a road I haven't before counts), boxing, drinking beer and playing pool, darts, or bowling, getting paid to talk shit (comedy), talking shit anyway without getting paid (comedy). | | Musica | Johnny Cash, Jane's Addiction, The Kinks, Social Distortion, Dropkick Murphys, Sam Cooke, early Bad Religion, Stone Temple Pilots, The Doors, Cream, Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Curtis Mayfield, Tribe Called Quest, blues, punk, many more classic rock bands, and many other rap groups from pre-95 that were more into telling a story than talking about what a bunch of tough guys they were because they smacked women and killed randomly as piece-of-shit bangers that finally got out of the 'hood by learning to make words rhyme instead of learning how to fucking spell one of them. No, I don't feel sorry for you, you're not the only person on Earth who grew up oppressed in a bad neighborhood, I'll hear your tale of woe after you've become more than a pathetic product of circumstance, and it's not scary to me that you say you've killed people, that's been done before as well. No biscuit, Homey. Most of you bangers are the same thing to the 'hood as what most goth kids are to the suburbs, whiners who think that you've suffered more than all the other kids, only you smack women and kill random people too. Retard. | | Film | Yes, let's watch some, they can be good and sometimes so damn bad that they're good anyway. Sometimes. "Shaolin Soccer" and "Starship Troopers" are two of the best things the human race has come up with so far though, I'll say that much. | | Televisione | I don’t have cable. That should give you a hint of how much TV I watch. | | Libri | Telling you what books I like would be like us going on a date. I'm just not ready for that. It's too soon. I've been hurt before, okay? (shaking my head with a "you just don't get it" look, turning away and running down the beach in tears... maybe picking a sea shell up along the way if it's really pretty) | | Eroi | Myself. It’s motivation to not let me down. |
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Brian Whitaker: Ultimo intervento
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Raed Jarrar is a Bitch
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The Legend of the Hipster’s Trucker Hat
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YES on Prop 8, for Christ’s sake
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The First Black Hologram
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Skinheads vs. Crackheads
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| [Visualizza tutti gli interventi] |
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Brian Whitaker: parlo di me |
Chi sono:
Well, gee, what is there to say? I got into comedy on a fluke, now I actually care about it, which isn't a Rocky-of-Comedy story, but I feel blessed to not be some poor bastard who's doing this to win the approval of their parents and get "that rush" from losing oneself in the spotlight while thinking "I showed you, Dad, I... I showed you." It's fun and rewarding to make people laugh, even honorable at times when you're thinking of how depressing other people may be currently making some audience members' lives, which is why I stick with it, but the sad truth is that I couldn't care less about if the entire room approves of me, some folks are meant to laugh at things like shit-and-smelly-vagina jokes that I'll just fail to deliver forever, then there are the folks who would rather hear the silly-billy stuff that I suck at as well. People who steal jokes are the same as people who steal food, money, cattle, or anything they didn't earn, they're thieves and don't count as comics. Okay, well, enough about me. Go to one of my fucking shows and I'll share more, maybe I'll even write you a poem and cry as I read it while holding my finger up the whole time to make sure you're listening and not just pretending to.
Oh, unless, of course, you're a certain stalker, in which case just looking at this page again has already been a serious mistake. Taco!
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Mi piacerebbe conoscere:
Fans. A gal who thinks Carrie Bradshaw is the embodiment of all negative female stereotypes and not an American icon. Victims, they're hilarious. People who don't say "Wait, I don't get it, are you kidding?" when I'm kidding.
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| Spazio amici di Brian Whitaker (Top 24) |
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Brian Whitaker ha 208 amici.
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