Coldcock Jones wishes to thank no one, except the motherfuckers who aid his jam, and the bands that be lending him some talent, like Jaik Willis, Lasers and Fast and Shit, Velcro Lewis Group, The Last Vegas, Dorian Taj, Suffrajett, ArsoNick Scum, Black Angus and all that shit.
Primary thanks to Lightnin' Deuce Rooster, of the Buttermilk 5, who wrote a lot of this with Coldcock way back when. He's the reason for the season, and the season was HOT.
Johnny "Coldcock" Jones was born in Peoria, IL on May 17th, 1933. In 1957, he collaborated for the first time with "Lightnin" Deuce Rooster (born Deuce Cooper) when they formed The Buttermilk 5. Their first album, Stop, Drop & Boogie, was a local smash, and though they released nothing again until 1968's, O' Lord, the Things I Done, they were hugely revered... in Peoria. They followed with various live albums (Live In St. Louis '72), and porn soundtracks (Chocolate On Chocolate).
Coldcock and Lightnin's feuds were monumental and legendary. The band broke up hundreds of times, though they always got back together because no one else would play with them, except a small group of local oddballs that hung around Peoria's famed recording studio, Chocolate Ladyland, in the hopes of scoring drugs.
The band's on-again-mostly-off-again ways continued up through 1970s. Coldcock and Lightnin' were busted for breaking into several liquor stores around Peoria's Southtown district in 1979, both received 20-year sentences and were sent to Stateville Prison in Joliet. Released in the fall of '99, both returned to Peoria and found that their hard living had left them too decrepit to take the stage in the manner that they once had. Unwilling to accept his demise, Coldcock enlisted the services of one of the many witchdoctors on Peoria's riverfront. In exchange for two handguns and bag of assorted pills, the wangateur was able to transport Coldcock Jones' spirit into the body of another, younger, more agile man.
Coldcock joined the body of carp fisherman, part-time composer/performer, sex scientist and son of Satan, ArsoNick Scum. Scum, a fan and friend of Coldcock's, was more than willing to share his physical domain. To accomplish the merger, both needed to die and mix their blood with the healing waters of the Illinois River. On March 4th, 1999, Coldcock Jones jumped off the McCluggage Bridge onto ArsoNick Scum, who sat in his carp-fishing boat. The impact, as you can imagine, bloodied them both and put them both into the river.
ArsoNick Scum was pulled from the river by Peoria policemen, who beat and subsequently released him. To this day, Scum has to deal with the fact that if he smokes a menthol cigarette while drinking whiskey, he will become the monster that is Coldcock Jones, Peoria Blues Legend®. As opposed to the monster that he usually is, The Heartbroken Heartbreaker®.
Having seen what was possible, Lightnin' Deuce Rooster followed suit, only to have the misfortune of transferring his spirit into the body of a narcoleptic.
Finding that neither of them were finding the opportunities that were needed at hom in the 309 area code, Scum moved to Chicago, where he associated with rock & roll, metal and indie rock types that afforeded him to obtain gigs for both himself and Coldcock. Of course no one believes the truth of their shared existence, but neither care, as their only concerns are damaging souls and getting fucked up on drugs and alcohol.
Coldcock found it difficult to assemble a blues band in Chicago, as many black bluesmen refused to accept him as a black man, as ArsoNick Scum holds the curse of being a white man. He was forced to form a band out of younger white blues players. Then due to the light shade of the band, many blues clubs in Chicago were not interested in hiring a young white blues band, so they soon began booking gigs with rock n roll, punk, and metal bands at rock clubs with the help of his "manager," ArsoNick Scum.
Lightnin' remains in Peoria, unaware of where either he or Coldcock is. His aunt CeCe, with whom he lives, has yet to notice that he is now white, nor that he falls asleep at random time during the day.
That's about the gist of it, except for this...
Artwork by Dave Moe, Video/Animation by Dylan Stanford, storyline by Coldcock Jones.
Peoria Chiefs vs. Dayton Dragons (above)
Coldcock Jones & The Shithawks | Arkadaşlar (Rastgele Yapılmış)
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Hey just wanted to stop by and thank you for your friendship and let you know that you can now download the entire "American Nightmare" album for ONE DOLLAR for a limited time!
Go to the Dead Aesthetic profile and click on the album cover art in the right hand column to get it now!
Thanks again for the support and I hope you enjoy the album!
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Every morning, every night, sometimes in the middle of the day... Escaping into dark, quiet corners to relieve myself Sometimes calmly, sometimes furiously... shamelessly Three times again today, is no surprise Laughing every time... seeing what I'd do to satisfy I want to take you up on all your offers... let you try Fulfill all the scintillating needs inside Heavenly wings and spitfire tongues taste like lullabies!
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Just shooting you over a reminder about the Horner park concert (2741 w montrose) series this friday june 10th. Ill be hitting the stage with Colin Gilmore and Mike Mangione at 7:00 pm. After party at the Lizard Lounge!
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