Dennis Joern

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Moonshine Shadow Blues- D.Murphy slide

Album: The Homeless Blues

Released: Jan 1, 2008

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Moonshine Shadow Blues- D.Murphy slide
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Maria- Lars Ole on Horn & Harmonica
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Farmers Garden
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Sandals
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The Ballad of Barney Fife
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Genre: Acoustic / Blues / Folk
Location Spokane, Washington, Un
Profile Views: 146227
Last Login: 5/3/2012
Member Since 9/29/2006
Website http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3LmJyb3RoZXJzam9lcm4uY29tL2Nkcy9ibHVlc2JhbGxhZHMv
Record Label unsigned
Type of Label Unsigned
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My Playlist
21 Songs | Sep 21, 2008
OTHERS
21 Songs | Jan 17, 2011
Blues
14 Songs | Sep 23, 2011

Drawing of the Week

DrAwInG AnD StOrY oF ThE WeEk:

ON THE BONNIE BONNIE BANKS OF LOCH NESSIE © Dennis Karl Joern

Paper Size: 14.5"x22"
Image Size: 13.5"x20.5"
Paper: Fabriano CMF Etching

Act XXXIV: Scene ix... Ichthyopod Beach

There was a change in the wind for Haggus T. MacCleod, a wizard of some renown. His chambers had become musty and ridden with spider webs two fingers thick and it was time for the castle maid to get it back to a workable state. Haggus was off on his first vacation in over one hundred and fifty years. Having saved nearly ten years in combined vacation and sick leave hours, and a bag of cash with neatly rubberbanded bundles to boot. Haggus decided to follow the advice of his longtime employer and king, Phinneaus the XVth, who said, “Go west old man!” The king had traveled much in his time on top secret matters of state and diplomacy, leaving Haggus at the castle to oversee the realm, which was always there upon his return. Haggus could be trusted to keep the walls from crumbling of this the king was certain. But the stench from the wizard’s tower had gotten out of hand and it was time for him to vacate the premises.

“Cheeze!” said Haggus, “Old Phinneaus sure is a good old fellow, and my bag is fulled up with brochures for everywhere to the left and a great ball of Nostril Bane Cheeze wrapped up so nicely in aluminium, by golly!”

Haggus had a dream to seek out as many strange and bizarre accounts of creatures of the legendary elusive form. Haggus had found The Burmudian Trianguloids from the Carrybean Ocean, the Abomination Man of the Hermaloyan Mountains, his cousin the Biggestfoot from the northern woods of the Lost World, and the Missing Linx of Evolvoland, the Dodo of the Galloping Isles. His dream of course was to find the much and long rumored sixty-six million year old Loch Nessie ichthyoid, Elliot, of the western edge of his very homeland. This should be his first stop, the infamous Loch...

“Oye hey, I sure wishes these boats had some pillowy padded seats,” said Haggus, “I done been sittin’ here on my blistering hindquarters for three weeks and not a thing have I seen but birds and snails and unicorns and a mermaid or three, not a thing unusual.” “And oh yeah, I saw young Lenny raiding old Mr. Melville’s onion and radish patch. No wonder he smells of a Tossed Caesar Salad!”

Haggus was enjoying the tunes from the wind flowing through trees while the boat rower was entertained him with stories of the local lore and a spicy gossip form time to time. He must have heard every story ever told from hereabouts since before people stopped grunting. Haggus was drifting off, imagination running wild, visions of Elliot coming up for air. His photo machine was poised and ready, it only took an instant to miss the opportunity of many lifetimes. Or an equal instant to capture it.

“I wonder if it’s time to move on,” spoke Haggus, “there are many other critters to find and this is going nowhere, not even a bite on my worm!” “Well there be the answer,” said the rower man, “ye can’t go danglin’ no stinking worms to catch Elliot!, you’d best try danglin’ that sandwich and especially if it’s got them white hot onions! He just loves them white hot onions!”

“And how many weeks was you gonna wait to tell me that?” asked Haggus, just as his photo machine’s flash flashed!

The proof is in the tabloids. Page one.

ThE eNd

Biographical Info

My FiRsT rEcOrD aLbUm

Ma bought me my first record album while we lived (for three and a half years) in Frankfurt, Germany, From the age of five to eight and a half. Pa was in the US Army intelligence. The album was “Johnny Horton Makes History”. We marched around the couch re-enacting the Battle of New Orleans with our wooden guns and swords singing with great enthusiasm for weeks! I still have that album.
There was a dinner club on base called The Topper Club where we were taken to hear cowboy bands touring from the states. I was too young to recall anyone specific other than Tommy Cash and his band. I would present my slip of paper and they played my requests. What else? Johnny Horton of course!
We also listened to a radio station out of Belgium that played the Everly Brothers, Buddy Holly, Little Richard and the rest from the beginning of the era. It was on late so brother Dave and I would listen under the covers. We got whooped with the belt pretty good a few times…

MY FIRST GUITAR
My first guitar came at about the age of 11 in Kansas City, Mo. We actually lived on 12th Street. But not Vine… When The Beatles came out with “Paperback Writer” I had to have one. It helped a lot that Sir Paul was a lefty. My brain couldn’t make a right-handed guitar work. So I changed the strings around the left way. The guitar was a nameless dark red sunburst cheesecutter that cost all of $15. Pa paid half and I paid half. Brother Dave and I would go down the street to the local church where the pastor taught guitar in the evenings. Fifteen budding rock stars strumming “We were sinking deep in sin” until our fingers bled. “Gloria” and “Wild Thing” seemed so much easier but we couldn’t play those in church. Not that devil stuff! We moved back to Spokane and that poor guitar fell apart. A victim of humidity changes I suspect… I also was one of only five from Manchester Elementary School chosen to sing in the Kansas City All-City Chorus.
I went without a guitar for a year until I bought a Decca hollow body electric with f holes for $36 at Valu-Mart. Now I found after flipping it around that the knobs were on the top, right where my left elbow went. Of course by this time Jimi was playing that upside down Strat. I must be ok I thought, just work around it…

Video: All The Way To Helsinki
Dennis K. Joern- Guitar and Vocal (on the swing as a youngin' in our military housing playground in Frankfurt, Germany)
Dave W. Joern- Guitar

THE LEGEND OF NEAR BLIND "SLIDIN' LEFTY" WILLIE McTAVISH

.. Photobucket

..

One day on the 14th of October, 1899, somewhere was born Willie McTavish. They say his mother, one Willameina DeFoe, was a hobo, dressing like a man, riding the rails. They also say that she was implicated in a string of serial killings of her fellow hobos but this report proved to be unfounded.

They settled in Kansas City, Missouri during the early 1910s on the corner of Twelfth Street and Vine when Willie was about nine. This was when his eyesight began to dwindle. Glasses it was. And thick ones at that. He liked collecting bugs. Bugs of all kinds. He’d catch them and drive a pin through them which held them to the cooling board, complete with a neatly written expose of the species. He derived great pleasure escaping into the world provided by the microscope his uncle Ted said he bought from East High School. His mother worried about Willie she did.

He picked up a guitar at the age of eleven from the owner of Krebs Rx, a man named Walter Krebs. Willie used his bike to make deliveries for extra money. But Walter Krebs was a man who would gladly give away a worthless guitar than pay the boy with cash. A lot of people traded possessions for food in those days and the guitar fit in this category. Money was tight when there wasn’t any.

Willie hit the road early, school wasn’t for him. His mother had gone bad and although he couldn’t see his hearing was just fine. He could hardly see two feet in front of him by now. If you got close enough he’d know who you were, but he couldn’t see the blackboard so off he went at fourteen. He borrowed his entire college fund of twelve dollars from the Mason jar and bought a bus ticket to Atlanta.

It’s said that then having run plum out of funds, he followed in his mothers footsteps and hopped trains from near to far. Eating fried worms out of rusty tin cans and drinking muddy water from a hollow bowl. All the while playing that guitar he nicknamed Talulah. From time to time he crossed paths with other pickers, more the further he meandered into the south, picking up licks from the likes of Little Slim Joe Joseph, Slidin’ Pansie Packernacky, Whiteboy Jeff Peabody, and Keemo Barker, who blew a harp like a train runnin’ a man down. Here Willie began accompanying some of these gentlemen to the local clubs and taverns. He learned volumes about life on these excursions. If the owners let them play they might make enough thrown money to get a hot meal and a bottle. The show was worth it from memories of the time. Bigman Charles Ahearn could make that guitar of his wail ’til the tears fell, some say, and another round went round, on the house.

In one of the towns the barhoppers told a tale, a tale of a place where a man could come to the crossroads, and for a price life would be apple pie a la mode from then on out. They had had enough spirits and decided this crossroads place sounded like a plan. The three of them, Willie, Slidin’ Pansie and another friend, Stutterin’ Stan Dixon proceeded out of town, left on Lakehurst Drive, one and a half miles take a right and go ’til you see the Johnson and Brown crossroad. They waited and jumped at every owl hoot or dog bark until Slidin’ Pansie and Stuttering Stan could take it no more. Stuttering Stan swore in the four hour police report that he had seen a vision of the bad place where the sky ain’t blue and you fry forever. He stayed in the drunk tank for two solid years. Willie stayed alone and wrote three classic songs as he sat watching the heavens revolve around him. No one lives to tell the tale of what happened that night. He did come back totally discombobulated and took to playing in the left hand position however. Rare if ever.

Willie soon began to pass most of his contemporaries with his talents. It was spring when a man from an independent New Yorkian recording company was traversing the territory and asked Willie after hearing him play if he wanted to lay down some tracks, and no, he didn’t want to lay down on no tracks! He’d seen what happens when the train comes.

So that’s why there are no recordings in existence of Near Blind Willie. No one knows what happened to him. He may have taken a job in the Edsel factory in the fifties, or died as a prisoner of war at the nuking of Hiroshima. He may have written his song, ’The Disappearance of Pierre Depardou’ from an actual meeting in Spain. Rumors persist of his exploits, and four photos. Some still live who knew him, interviews have been given and books written.

Now if you should see an antique old black man wandering aimlessly with a resonator strapped over his shoulder and a small glass sliding bottle sticking out of his vest pocket you might want to ask him to play a tune. He might just give a bar or two of "If Sad am Blue"! You never can tell...

The End

Art Shows & Etcetera

ART SHOWS/GALLERIES (Past & Present)

SFCC Student Show- Eastern Washington State University- 1978- Cheney, WA
One Person Show- The Galleria/Riverfront Park 1978- Spokane, WA
Designer Show- SFCC Fine Arts Gallery 1978- Spokane, WA
Carnegie Art Center Show 1978- Walla Walla, WA
J. Harken/Meyers Gallery- Spokane, WA
The Snowgoose Gallery- Spokane, WA
Two Person Show- Daults Paint Palette- 1978- Spokane, WA
Ruth Mayer Gallery- Laguna Beach, CA
Second Street Gallery- Santa Monica, CA
One Person Show- 1, 2, 3, Arts- 1985- Spokane, WA
Best Black & White Of Show- Westercon '90- Seattle, WA
Quicksilver Fantasies- 1990-1992- Post Falls, ID
Cheney Cowles Museum Sampler- 1993- Spokane, WA
Cheney Cowles Museum- Works From the Heart- 1993- Spokane, WA
Colburns Gallery- Spokane, WA
Cheney Cowles Museum Sampler- 1994- Spokane, WA
Cheney Cowles Museum- Works From the Heart- 1994- Spokane, WA
Cheney Cowles Museum- Works From the Heart- 1996- Spokane, WA
Ra-Tels- 1997- Spokane, WA
Pend Oreille Artists Regional Show- 1999- Metaline Falls, WA
CREATE Art Auction 2000- Newport, WA
Museum of Arts and Culture- Works From the Heart- 2001- Spokane, WA
Panida Theater, three artist collaboration: May 2001- Sandpoint, ID
Allen James Teague, solo piano concert
Photography by Dave Joern
And my Pen and ink drawings and paintings
Museum of Arts and Culture- Works From the Heart- 2002- Spokane, WA
Museum of Arts and Culture- Works From the Heart- 2004- Spokane, WA
Museum of Arts and Culture- Works From the Heart- 2005- Spokane, WA
Museum of Arts and Culture- Works From the Heart- 2006- Spokane, WA

ALBUM COVER
My drawing, The Sidewalk Cafe was used by Richard Elliot for his debut album titled Trolltown. Including such gems as Until You Come Back To Me, Ducks From Mars, Stankfoot, and Trolltown. Album design by Brian Ayuso. Intima Records CDE-73233.

MAGAZINE
Koh-I-Noor Rapidograph pen advertisement that ran in various major art publications.

TELEVISION
2005- PBS episode of Northwest Profiles featuring my drawings, and soundtrack excerpts of a solo piano composition by Allen James Teague of "The Light and the Dark" and "Blues for Afghanistan" by Mad Mama Moon

Original Works included in Private Collections:
Los Angeles, San Francisco, Laguna Beach, Atwater, Mill Valley, Midpines, Venice,
Yosemite, Santa Monica, CA
Seattle, Spokane, Newport, WA
Portland, OR
Portland, MA
Atlanta, GA
Jackson, MS
Galveston, Houston, TX
St. Vincent, Redwood Falls, Babbitt, MN
Kansas City, MO
New Orleans, LA
New York, NY...
Bali
Zandvoort, Netherlands

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Influences

Johnny Horton, Marty Robbins, Johnny Cash, Willie, Waylon and the Boys, Buddy Holly, Bob Dylan, John, Sir Paul, George, Ringo, Stu and Pete, Jimi, Noel and Mitch, Stevie Ray Vaughn, Buck Owens and the Buckaroos, The Stones, Jade Warrior, Louis Armstrong, Patsy Cline, The Allman Bros., Willie Dixon, Roy Clark, Cream, Bob Marley, Big Mama Thornton, CCR, The Masked Marauders, Son House, Kitty Wells, Little Stevie Wonder, Midnight Oil, Leon Redbone, John Lee Hooker, Tony Bennett, Memphis Slim, The Ramones, The Yardbirds, Blind Willie McTell, Rick Nelson, Robert Johnson, Bing Crosby, Patti Smith, Leadbelly, Roy Orbison, Jerry Lee Lewis, Muddy Waters, Janis Joplin, John Lee Hooker, B.B. King, Peter Tosh, Cab Calloway, Sonny Terry, Brownie McGhee, Etta James, Rev. Gary Davis, John Mayalls Bluesbreakers, Elmore James, Little Richard, Dennis Day, Johnny Winter, Big Bill Broonzy, Pinetop Perkins, Sons of the Pioneers, Blind Boy Fuller, Carlos Santana, Blind Lemon Jefferson, Canned Heat, Thin Lizzie, ? and the Mysterians, Buddy Guy, The Who, Howlin' Wolf, Sir Elton, Doc and Merle Watson, Joan Baez, Woody, Arlo, Tony Iommi, Motown, Frank Marino and Mahogany Rush, Led Zeppelin, AC/DC, The Clash, The Tragically Hip, Pete Seeger, Bo Diddley, Ritchie Blackmore, Pink Floyd, Mama Cass, Otis Redding, Michael Hedges, Donovan, T-Rex, Alvin Lee, GFR, Leslie West, CSN&Young, Joni Mitchell...

OTHERS-
my son Sam, Wes Torres, Linda Painter, Denny Yasuhara, Lee Knouse, Crazy Horse, Leonardo, Albert Einstein, Hillary Clinton, MLKjr, Rembrandt Van Rijn, Chief Joseph, Vincent Van Gogh, RFK, Freeman Dyson, Rosa Parks, Curly, Moe, Larry and Shemp, John Adams, Scarlett Johansson, Thomas Jefferson, John Muir, Babe Ruth, Salvador Dali, Steven Hawking, Ghandi, Calamity Jane, The Marx Bros., Liv Tyler, Sitting Bull, E.A.Poe, Nelson Mandela, Julia Roberts, Jackie Robinson, Neil Armstrong, Eric the Red, Stan and Ollie, Red Cloud, Yoko Ono, Abbie Hoffman, Kitt Carson, Ma & Pa Kettle, Joan of Arc, Claus Oldenberg, JRR Tolkein, Davy Crockett, Robin Williams, Picasso, Cole Younger, Marlene Deitrich, Pres. Jimmy Carter, Robert Frost, Kate Hepburn, Joe Namath, Oliver Cromwell, Humphrey Bogart, MC Escher, Major General George Pickett's Virginians, William Wallace, Eleanor Roosevelt, Zorro...

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Band Members

*** Dennis Karl Joern -lyrics, vocals and guitars

*** Dawn -lyrics and vocal on "I'm Not Your Sidedish"
Co-vocals on "Sandals" and "The Wandering Cowboy"
(the highs and the lows - the voices from way down in the wilds of the Everglades)

*** Dave W. Joern -guitars, bass on "Farmers Garden",
"So Tired", "I'm Not An Animal", and "Pack It Up and Go"

*** Lars Ole Hafsmo ...many places in Norway- horn, harmonica and backing vocal on "Maria"

*** D. E. Murphy ...somewhere in New Jersey (no photo available) -slide guitar on "Moonshine Shadow Blues".
D.E. Murphy uses D.R. strings!

http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/allenjamesteague

*** Allen James Teague -piano, keyboards and engineering/mixing
The Allen James Teague Solo Piano CD, "A Poet's Heart" is now available at cdbaby.

Chet Montbriand on the farm outside of Duluth, Minnesota- late 1930's
The song "The Wandering Cowboy" was written by my father Wayne Arthur "Red" Joern in 1939 for his friend Chet Montbriand and his band to perform at the local barn dances back home in Duluth and other area towns in Minnesota. My father was working as a dental assistant during the construction of the Grand Coulee Dam in Washington state at the time. Although I never heard the song played, I hope I've done it justice.

For my adventurous friends, you may check out excerpts from the entire "Blues and Ballads" CD at the Band Website link above.

THE TALE OF THE "SANDALS" SONG
So it came to pass that one day we took off with the two youngest for the Pacific coast on a much deserved vacation and it was hotter than heck in my piece of doggiedoo ford fairmont. We had a great time at seaside and garibaldi, buying a crabbeast right there where it came out from the water, boiling its sorry carcass and feasting, then proceeded to camp there upon the waters edge... the next day it was getting really weird weatherly related, so we bebopped about our business until the day drew to a close, needing to find another place to camp. Then, without even a warning, holy grail, the skies opened up. We set the tent up in a 45 degree angle downpour, almost to the point of finding the answer in the wind! We went off to find food, finding a fine pizza joint not too far off. When we returned the tent was flat smack on the ground, everything inside was soaked so we were les miserables. Morning came as often it did, calmer with a slight drizzle, so we walked down to the beach to remove our foot apparel and dance shoeless in the sand. While this frivolity was transpiring, my sandals had been removed from terra firma and were well on their way, heading west, chasing the sun upon the Pacific Ocean! So thus it happened, my mind conceived a song, and my foots had no clothes!

Flag Counterings

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Revolver Map Added 8.20.11

World Flag Counter Added 1.1.10

USA Flag Counter Added 9.9.09

Some Ancestors &...

Richard Warren came to North America from England on the Mayflower in 1620... his wife and five daughters came to the New World in 1623. Richard and Elizabeth subsequently had sons Nathaniel and Joseph at Plymouth. About his death Nathaniel Morton's 1669 book New England's Memorial, stated: "This year died Mr. Richard Warren, who was an useful instrument and during his life bare a deep share in the difficulties and troubles of the first settlement of the Plantation of New Plymouth."

Great Great Grandfather Hole-in-the-Day. Chippewa. White Earth, Minnesota... "He was a man of distinguished appearance and native courtliness of manner. His voice was musical and magnetic, and with these qualities he had a subtle brain, a logical mind, and quite a remarkable gift of oratory." Reverend Claude H. Beaulieu

William Whipple Warren (1825-1853) author of "History of the Ojibway People". First published in 1885... Born in LaPointe, Minnesota. In 1842 he married Matilda Aiken and moved to Crow Wing, Minnesota. His career includes a seat on Minnesota State Legislature, and writer for The Minnesota Democrat.

Great Grandfather Hans G. Peterson came to North America from Oslo, Norway sometime in the latter 19th century.

Grandfather Arthur August Joern played a horn in the Ogema Concert Band in Minnesota. Walked off one day never to be heard from again. (bottom right of photo)

Grandpa "Pete" George I. Peterson was gassed and had several fingers shot off during WWI in France. He survived. (photo-Grandpa as Santa with Dave)... Grandpa Pete would stick a shot off finger stub up to his eye socket and say, "could you help me pull this out!" (cause it looked like half his finger was inside his head), and we would all scream and run away. It always made him chuckle and laugh.

My uncle Claire Peterson of the 101st Airborne was killed in WWII during the Battle of the Bulge on 12.19.1944.(second photo in Belgium)

A FEW FAVORITE FILMS-
Harvey, Lust for Life, Them, A Hard Days Night, Backbeat, The Sixth Sense, Smoke Signals, Dear Brigitte, The Day the Earth Stood Still, The Point, Little Big Man, Caveman, 300, The 300 Spartans, Silent Running, Way Out West, A Shot In The Dark, Giant, Jumanji, The Adventures of Baron Munchausen, Zoot Suit, Quest for Fire, Transformers, Duck Soup, Enemy Mine, Polar Express, It's a Wonderful Life, Treasure of the Sierra Madre, Shane, Those Magnificent Men in their Flying Machines, How Green Was My Valley, Oh Brother Where Art Thou, A Night at the Museum, Meet John Doe, The Grapes of Wrath, Fantasia, The Petrified Forest, Rebel Without a Cause, Monkey Business, Outland, Eight Legged Freaks, Animal House, Sergeant York, To Kill A Mockingbird, The Quiet Man, Braveheart, The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, Battlefield Earth, Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow, The Birds, Snow White and the 7 Dwarves, The Ghost and Mrs. Muir, The Hustler, Ground Hog Day, Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, Monsters Inc, What Dreams May Come, Pinocchio, The Shakiest Gun in the West, Life of Brian, Goonies, The Commitments, Pollyanna, The Spirit of St. Louis, Pleasantville, Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan, Scrooged, Meatballs, Van Helsing, Follow That Dream, Zathura, The Charge of the Light Brigade, Toy Story, Evolution, That Thing You Do, Metropolis, The Island, Sin City, Citizen Kane, The Vikings, The Postman, Independence Day, Indiana Jones (I,III,IV), The Swiss Family Robinson, Enemy at the Gate, Unforgiven, The Astronaut Farmer, The Sandlot, Me Myself and Irene, Total Recall, The Greatest Story Ever Told, Galaxy Quest, The Rocketeer, Some Like it Hot, The 5th Element, Jason and the Argonauts, Signs, Pride of the Yankees, The Maltese Falcon, The One, The Wizard of Oz, Underworld, Evolution, Back to the Future (I, III), The List of Adrian Messenger, Minority Report, The Inn of the Sixth Happiness, Mars Attacks!, Kangaroo Jack, King Creole, The Ghost and Mr. Chicken, Lord of the Rings Trilogy, The Man Who Fell to Earth, Time Bandits, They Died with Their Boots On, Waterworld, Lost Boys, Forrest Gump, Harry Potter (all), AI, ET, The Scarlet Pimpernel, The Borrowers, Total Recall, Field of Dreams, Pathfinder, How I Won the War, Casablanca, Before Sunrise, Spartacus, It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World...

Dennis Joern

Moonshine Shadow Blues- D.Murphy slide

Maria- Lars Ole on Horn & Harmonica

Farmers Garden

Sandals

The Ballad of Barney Fife

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