Just me so far, currently waiting for responses by "Weird" Al Yankovic and my Third Grade math teacher, both of which are not 100% sure about whether or not they can tour, due to personal tragedies, dental appointments and fear.
Influences
"The third time I saw [Doctor Whalemilk] stands out the most.
He had been staying at the rural property of a
mutual friend for at least a week, "living off the
land," as they say, his diet consisting mostly of wild
mushrooms, small perch, and sundry bark and leaves.
Apparently his model rocketry experiment had gone totally
awry after about the third day without sleep, when,
his stash depleted, he began doing huge rails of
half-expended model rocket fuel. This made him crazy, and mean.
When I found him down by the elmbottom, he was naked,
caked head-to-toe in this rank-smelling blue goo he had
concocted from creek mud and wild gooseberries. He began
addressing me as Xenu, evil galactic dictator and foe of
Scientology, and I was thus embroiled in this horrifying
nightmare scenario from which I was lucky to escape alive.
He would submerge himself in the noxious swamp for
hours, breathing threw a hollow reed, until,
triumphantly, he would thrash his way to the surface, a
writhing fish clenched in his teeth. He would gut the fish
with a flint shaving, devour its still-twitching
skeleton, and force-feed me the rest, all while screaming
these horrible things about my mother and pouring the
stinking remnants of week-old mushroom tea down my throat.
I don't know what the ordeal was meant to
accomplish, but by the end of the third month, [Doctor Whalemilk] had
succeeded in converting huge quantities of limestone into a
crude copper ore, and, his fortune secured, he left me
tied to a tree, in the middle of the rainy season. I
gnawed off my own hand at the wrist in order to
escape.
I last saw [Doctor Whalemilk] at a friend's brother's friend's
son's Bar Mitzvah. He shot me in the solar plexus ,
then went on to clear up my bar tabs at every club in
town before midnight that evening. Class act all the
way, that [Doctor Whalemilk]. "
I am Mr Yousf Ahmed from Cote-Ivory Abijan.I am 29 years old and presently
residing in Dakar-Senegal because of the political crisis in my Country. I got
your contact in strict confidence through Senegal Chamber of Commerce.
Need trouble with washing the hog. Also can't stop bleeding from several penetrations.
Deciding which breakfast cereal to use in the treatment of constipation can be difficult considering the names of cereals, such as 100% Bran, All-Bran and Complete Wheat Bran.
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