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Paranoid Masturbator
Improv / Stand-Up / General
Paranoid Masturbator Back in Louisville, KY

Male
29 years old
Louisville, KY
United States



Last Login: 11/5/2009
Mood: adored Mood Image
View My: Pics | Gifts

   Contacting Paranoid Masturbator

 MySpace URL: 

   Paranoid Masturbator's Comedian Bio
BioI'm 28. I just moved here from Dallas, TX, and I work a lot. My bills keep piling up its almost like I'm irresponsable or something. Anyways I love cooking, music, (no not cooking music lol), I laugh a lot but not always at stuff thats funny... I have a huge dog, a daughter who lives with her mommy, a baby's momma who I love dearly but can't stand because I'm not anywhere near on the same page with, and I'm loving life today because I'm living well! Ladies don't ask me out to eat because you really don't want to sit there watching me stuff my face as fast as I can. And don't ask me out for drinks either because I turn into an ass showing idiot who will regret the pictures you post on the internet the next day.

    Paranoid Masturbator's Interests
General
Music
MoviesI don't know I love going to the movies but i need a hot date and since you're all chicken then I'll stay at home watching on demand.
BooksI like to read books with pictures of hot naked girls. I won't lie. I don't read the articles. I do however love reading emails from all you hot women telling me you'd love to take me out and then I give you my number but you never call. I guess I should start reading maybe some of your web logs. Nah.

     Paranoid Masturbator's Details
Status:Single
Here for:Networking, Dating, Serious Relationships, Friends
Orientation:Straight
Hometown:Dallas
Body type:6' 0" / Slim / Slender
Ethnicity:Native American
Religion:Christian - other
Zodiac Sign:Scorpio
Smoke / Drink:Yes / Yes
Children:Proud parent
Education:In college
Occupation:CEO
Income:$30,000 to $45,000

   Paranoid Masturbator's Schools
Sullivan University
Louisville,Kentucky
Graduated: N/A
Degree: Associate's Degree
Major: CET
 

2009 to 2010

   Paranoid Masturbator's Companies
ADECCO / UPS SCS
Louisville, KY US
Technical Consultant / Technician
Ernst & Young

July 09 - Present


Paranoid Masturbator's Latest Blog Entry  [Subscribe to this Blog]

Mixed up pills story  (view more)

My friend VVM  (view more)

Dreams of Sex  (view more)

Search for Extra-Terrestrial Intelligence  (view more)

[View All Blog Entries]

   Paranoid Masturbator's Blurbs
About me:
Who the @%& do I think I am?
Who I'd like to meet:

   Paranoid Masturbator's Friend Space (Randomized)
Paranoid Masturbator has 59 friends.
 CRYSTAL 


 PEACHES 


 Leaura 


 doug benson 


 jessica 


 Marcia 


 Kara 


 Binx 

Online Now!



Paranoid Masturbator's Friends Comments
Displaying 25 of 25 comments  ( View All | Add Comment )
CrAZy fUn***SExY

Crazy Monkey



Nov 27 2009 1:43 PM

Hi love!
ms.drake

FIVe star EX eXotIc dancer



Nov 7 2009 12:38 AM


Check out my page
http://www.doulike.us/photos/7271327.html?b=4&w=46




Let me know if you like me YES or NO
http://www.doulike.us/photos/7271327.html?b=4&w=46

MISUNDERSTOOD

Laura SHeckles



Nov 6 2009 3:11 AM

This comment was sent by your friend via the Kiss Me app. To block this app and all communications from it, click Here.


-------------------------------------------




I just kissed you.
Click here to kiss me back!

smoochies

ms.drake

FIVe star EX eXotIc dancer



Nov 1 2009 5:03 PM

thanks 4 the add


Stephannie Streble

Stephannie Streble



Oct 6 2009 3:42 AM

This comment was sent by your friend via the Green Spot app. To block this app and all communications from it, click Here.


-------------------------------------------

Hey Paranoid Masturbator,
I left you a gift. Click and pick it up.
COME JOIN MY TEAM ON GREENSPOT.

Stephannie Streble

Stephannie Streble



Sep 30 2009 7:47 PM

This comment was sent by your friend via the Cheers!! app. To block this app and all communications from it, click Here.


-------------------------------------------
Hey Paranoid Masturbator, I am sending you a Hot n Fruity.


Send me a drink back!

Stephannie Streble

Stephannie Streble



Sep 28 2009 2:27 PM

This comment was sent by your friend via the Cheers!! app. To block this app and all communications from it, click Here.


-------------------------------------------
Hey Paranoid Masturbator, I am sending you a 69 Special.


Send me a drink back!

Stephannie Streble

Stephannie Streble



Sep 27 2009 3:09 PM

This comment was sent by your friend via the Cheers!! app. To block this app and all communications from it, click Here.


-------------------------------------------
Hey Paranoid Masturbator, I am sending you a After 8 Shooter.


Send me a drink back!

Stephannie Streble

Stephannie Streble



Sep 26 2009 9:57 PM

This comment was sent by your friend via the Cheers!! app. To block this app and all communications from it, click Here.


-------------------------------------------
Hey Paranoid Masturbator, I am sending you a Strawberry Shortcake.


Send me a drink back!

Stephannie Streble

Stephannie Streble



Sep 26 2009 4:56 PM

This comment was sent by your friend via the Cheers!! app. To block this app and all communications from it, click Here.


-------------------------------------------
Hey Paranoid Masturbator, I am sending you a After 8 Shooter.


Send me a drink back!

Stephannie Streble

Stephannie Streble



Sep 26 2009 3:32 AM

This comment was sent by your friend via the Cheers!! app. To block this app and all communications from it, click Here.


-------------------------------------------
Hey Paranoid Masturbator, I am sending you a carrie.


Send me a drink back!

Stephannie Streble

Stephannie Streble



Sep 21 2009 11:58 PM

This comment was sent by your friend via the Green Spot app. To block this app and all communications from it, click Here.


-------------------------------------------

Hey Paranoid Masturbator,
I left you a gift. Click and pick it up.
COME JOIN MY TEAM ON GREENSPOT.

Binx

Jason Mogollon
Online Now!


Sep 10 2009 9:55 PM

BATTLE OF THE SEXES!
DJ SILVERS OFFICIAL B-DAY BASH!!!
(FRIDAY 09.11.09 @ PLUSH)
972.898.8000 for Table/Bottles & Guest List

You are Cordially invited to help us celebrate Dj SILVERS's BIRTHDAY @ PLUSH Night Club!
It wouldn't be a party & it wouldn't be Plush if we didn't do it BIG! This is the only place that could host the Official BIRTHDAY PARTY of Dj SILVER!
For the first time ever in Dallas....It's the BATTLE OF THE SEXES featuring two members of the World Famous NY HITMEN Dj Crew rockin 4 turntables all night long!
From Los Angeles Ca Dj LADY KATE & From Austin Tx Dj SILVER!
These two djs have been featured from coast to coast at some of the most elite parties from HOLLYWOOD to NEW YORK - LAS VEGAS to MIAMI & are featured at some of the biggest night clubs in the world.
They have headlined tours with JACKASS, VIVA LA BAM, & PLAYBOY to name a few! These two Dj's have shared the same stage with artists such as
PITBULL, NELLY, MICKEY AVALON, TWISTA, BABY BASH, LMFAO, SHWAYZE, WARREN G, & MIMS.
Come see them perform live at PLUSH FRIDAY SEPTEMBER 11th!
This event will be filled with celebrity guests and will sell out!
972-898-8000 for Table & Bottle Service (Text full names for guest list)
Full details @
www. myspace. com/mattjahnel
www. facebook.com/MATTJAHNEL
<a href="http://www.myspace.com/dfwbottlepoppers"; target=&quot
Drinkin' in Louisville

Drinkin' in Louisville



Sep 8 2009 9:45 PM






Binx

Jason Mogollon
Online Now!


Sep 4 2009 1:14 AM

BLU ENERGY LAUNCH PARTY!
DJ POLLUX B-DAY BASH!
(FRIDAY 4TH @ PLUSH)
*SAY BLU ENERGY @ THE DOOR TO GET IN FREE*
972.898.8000 for Table/Bottles & Guest List


PARTY LIKE A ROCKSTAR!
Contact US & we will throw you the HOTTEST PARTY
or B-DAY PARTY you could imagine!
BOOK YOUR TABLE & BOTTLES NOW!
972-898-8000
www. myspace. com/mattjahnel
www. myspace. com/dfwbottlepoppers
Jinx

Jinx



Aug 26 2009 3:40 PM

Lol! Which 1 is it? Im totally gona tell her how big of a douchebag u are! All women should be warned of your almighty douchebagism. But then again, no1 ever warned me. Lmao! I have 2 work ALL friggin wkend so it dont look like ima be able 2 chill. I can bring the baby over if u wana see her tho. Just lemme know
Jinx

Jinx



Aug 26 2009 5:24 AM

Blah! Wtf r u up 2 douchebag! I just got off work. Im watching karma sleep. She was such a holy terror 2day. Shes a lil sweetheart now tho. She was asking about you earlier
PEACHES

peaches N CREAM



Aug 24 2009 11:47 PM

i like u too ur sexy ass hell an im tryin ta quit as well we can try quitin together thats when eva ya wanna chill hit me up ;-)
PEACHES

peaches N CREAM



Aug 24 2009 8:26 PM


Check out my page
http://www.doulike.us/photos/7289192.html?b=4&w=46




Let me know if you like me YES or NO
http://www.doulike.us/photos/7289192.html?b=4&w=46

Jinx

Jinx



Aug 23 2009 3:25 PM

Church huh? Why? So sum old fart in a robe can yell at me 4 not putting enough money in the collection plate? Absolutly not! Im keepin my money! Speaking of such things? When should i start expecting your baby payments? LOL!
Binx

Jason Mogollon
Online Now!


Jul 23 2009 7:29 PM

*PLUSH*
DJ SPIDER this Friday!


PARTY LIKE A ROCKSTAR!
BOOK YOUR TABLE & BOTTLES
for this Friday @ PLUSH!
972.898.8000
www. myspace. com/dfwbottlepoppers
Send Guest List names to
972.898.8000 or
DFWBOTTLEPOPPERS@YAHOO.COM
*OBG<3'zL@ L3y*LoNuestroRecords13

Jena Acosta



Jun 3 2009 2:01 PM


Check out my page
http://www.wholikesu.net/photos/3073631.html?b=4&w=46




Let me know if you like me YES or NO
http://www.wholikesu.net/photos/3073631.html?b=4&w=46

Binx

Jason Mogollon
Online Now!


Jun 1 2009 8:41 PM

*PLUSH*
FRIDAY 5th- PAJAMA PARTY!
*Dress in your Pajamas to get in FREE*
WEAR ANYTHING YOU WANT!

LADIES NIGHT & BIKINI CONTEST EVERY THURSDAY!

To be placed on the VIP GUEST LIST
TABLE/BOTTLE reservations
B-DAY Reservations
Contact: Matt Jahnel 972-898-8000
www. myspace. com/mattjahnel
www. myspace. com/plushdallas
Steve

Steve



Jun 1 2009 2:13 AM

Photobucket
Binx

Jason Mogollon
Online Now!


May 27 2009 11:50 PM

*PLUSH*
FRIDAY-The #1 Drummer DJ & the #1 Video DJ
in the World collide for One Night Only!


THURSDAY-LIVE PERFORMANCE by KAYA JONES
of the PUSSYCAT DOLLS w/guest DJ SILVER!

LADIES NIGHT & BIKINI CONTEST EVERY THURSDAY!

To be placed on the VIP GUEST LIST
TABLE/BOTTLE reservations
B-DAY Reservations
Contact: Matt Jahnel 972-898-8000
www. myspace. com/mattjahnel</a&
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