ere whacks

Member Since:

April 12, 2007

Members:

There were four of us at the last count. Here is a little snippet about each of us in no particular order.

Julian ‘Banjo’ Vincent:-

Julian is a self confessed banjo-nerd. You name it, he's played it, published it, broadcasted it or recorded it on the banjo and is the organiser of the annual Bath Banjo Festival. Julian is the band’s intellectually gifted member, working as he does as an esteemed (i.e. mad) professor of something at the Bath University and even having his own programme on Radio Four. His latest invention is a range of incontinence clothing (honestly) which has instantly provided the ingredients for a plethora of new limericks and much sniggering by the others.

Julian is in demand as a performer and speaker throughout the world, though we're not sure whether his regular trips to Holland are anything to do with that.

As the organiser of the Bath Banjo Festival and publisher of the Banjoists' Broadsheet, you might not find it too hard to guess what instrument he plays. Yes, that’s right, the guitar and mandolin. Oh yes and the banjo too.

Richard Eamer MD:-

Richard is the band's newest member, having take up the role previously occupied by Malcolm 'sex object' Richards, who has now left us to become a spy.

Handily, Richard lives just around the corner from Robin, which made him an ideal candidate for the job of accordionist. In an amazing coincidence, it transpired Richard does have an accordion and what's more, can play it! .

Now we come to the embarrassing bit. We have to tell you that when he is not performing with us, he can be found participating in the activity which no-one dares mention - Morris Dancing (MD). Well, I've said it now, so it's all in the open. It would have been easier if we had found out he slaughters young virgins in a moonlit field near Wellow once a month. Oh, apparently he does that as well, but not to worry.

Anyway, he's bloody good at accordianining.

John ‘Eddy Baby’ Moon:-

‘ere whacks was John’s idea, despite the fact his only musical experience at the time was the odd bit of karaoke. As he can’t play any kind of instrument except the kazoo, John was the natural choice as the band’s singer, his lack of talent more than made up for by his extensive wardrobe of strange and amusing clothing which often/sometimes appears at various stages during performances.

A life long fan of Monty Python, Adge Cutler and anything amusing or silly, John claims to know more than 1000 jokes, most of which his friends have heard at least twenty three times.

Embarrassed by his lack of musical talent, John makes himself feel better by writing new lyrics to the band’s unique collection of ripped off tunes most people have forgotten long ago. At times he has almost been famous, with numerous radio and tv appearances talking about motorsport and you can still sometimes hear him jabbering away at the Castle Combe circuit.

In the daylight hours, John collects cigarette cards featuring famous traffic wardens.

Robin 'innocent' Phillips:-

Robin was a natural choice as our double bass player because a) he was prepared to go out and buy one b) his wife has a car with enough room in the back to fit it in c) he had never played one before, and d) John had run out of other people to ask.

Luckily, Robin's daughter, Phoebe, a gifted bass player with ace band The Volt , provided enough social pressure on her father to instantly accelerate his talents to the incredibly high standards required by a band whose leader often walks around with his arse hanging out of his trousers.

As a whimsical aside to his music making, Robin can often be seen visiting his office in Queen Square in Bath, where he pretends to be a member of the legal profession.

Influences:

Our early influence was Adge Cutler, founder of the Wurzels and many of our numbers are Adge's originals. They include, Twice Daily, Pill Pill, Thee casn't kill cooch, Champion Dung Spreader, Don't tell I tell 'eee and Drink up thee Zider.

We have since evolved into other genres, principally parody, our main criteria being that we should enjoy making and playing our songs as much you do hearing them.

One of our favourite numbers is 'My Girl's Pussy' which was originally written by a band leader in the '20s and '30s called Harry Roy. It was made 'famous' however by R.Crumb, the man who invented 'Keep on Trucking' and his band the 'Cheap Suit Serenaders'.

Other re-written numbers include Tell Laura I love her, Livin next door to Alice, Lily the Pink, The Lumberjack Song, Always look on the bright side of life and our most ambitious rewrite - Don't Chav - a rip-off of Don't cha by the Pussy Cat Dolls.

But really, our main influence is earning a bit of extra money on the side to supplement the window cleaning. By the way, we also have some nice T shirts for sale with our logo on.

Sounds Like:

You ought to read our TESTIMONIALS.

I know they aren't supposed to go here but we couldn't find anywhere else to put them.

Anyway, here is what people say about us. Most of them are genuine.

"Thank you so much for helping us celebrate in May. It was perfect. Your group helped to make our special day. It was a wonderful collection of songs, tunes and acts that turned our day from a simple ceremony into a memorable day of merriment. Our thanks to the boys in the band, kindest regards" Julie & Chris (Wedding, Priddy Green May 2007)

"Excellent" The Raven, Bath

"Brilliant, we will definitely have you back again" Foresters Arms, East Coker, Somerset.

'I would like to thank you all for playing at The Raven . . . Judging from the crowd it was a real success and I did enjoy your music a lot. Let me know if you have more gigs this summer. . . . We are collecting photographs of the evening for our website, so if you have some of your performance please email them to caroline.thibeaud@bathfestivals.org.uk' May 2008.

"Very impressed, much better than I was expecting!!" P. Wells, Shoscombe, July 2008

"Thank you so much John for coming on Sunday and supplying the music in the afternoon which was bloody brilliant, absolutely perfect !!!" D. Burns, Northend Inn, April 2010

"I noticed the band had the word whacks in their title and as I love having my bottom treated in this manner, I instantly became a fan." M. Moseley.

"According to the data we have on them, they produce a fine range of contact lenses for racing pigeons. However, not all our records are complete as we have temporarily mislaid a few million gigabytes down behind the back of the sofa" Alastair Darling

"Ten pints of cider please lads and get one for yourselves too" Amy Winehouse

Record Label:

Branston pickle