JUST SAY GNOME! (AKA. 'Neo Gnomes,' 'Gnome is Where the Heart Is') is a REVOLUTIONARY GARDEN GNOME BUSINESS based in Portland, Oregon. We specialize in transforming really bad and mediocre (garden gnome-related) puns into sculpture.
A Few of Our Initial Product lines are:
GNOME CHOMSKY THE GARDEN NOAM
GARDEN 'OM'S (Meditating Garden Gnomes)
The ALIEN 'GARDEN GNOMES' (Complete with Anal Probe)
The GREEN MAN GARDEN GNOME
And Here's a little more introductory info. about Gnomes for anyone who's interested:
THE GARDEN GNOME STORY
You’re walking around a nice quiet neighborhood, it’s a nice Spring early evening and there’s many nice gardens along the street – when suddenly you notice a strange little figure with a bright red hat and bushy beard staring out at you through the bushes. What is it!?
When and why did it become popular to put short bearded figures – gnomes – in gardens? And what is a gnome anyway? And what’s with all these stories of people stealing garden gnomes and even taking them on trips around the world? Well, lets start with the basic question: “what is a gnome and a garden gnome in particular?” …
Garden Gnomes and ‘Actual’ Gnomes
Modern garden gnomes are based on the legendary “Gnomes” of myth, mysticism, and fairy tales. Gnomes have historically been described as small (from a few inches to a foot or two in height) stout beings who live in Nature - usually underground. European magicians and other mystics considered gnomes the most common and important elemental spirits of the ‘Earth’ element (the other three classical elements being: ‘Water,’ ‘Fire,’ and ‘Air’). Gnomes were said to wear conical hats and to be able to move through the earth itself as easily as we humans walk upon it; yet if any of these underground dwellers were caught out in the daylight it was said that the rays of the Sun turned them into stone. But other sources reported that gnomes merely turned into toads during the sunlight hours.
Sometimes gnomes were said to have magical powers to protect or punish people – or to reward them with happiness. Gnomes are also said to be guardians of secret underground treasures – especially gold! Even in modern times gnomes are said by some –such as the highly influential mystic Rudolph Steiner - to be involved in the hidden processes of plant life. In fact many farms, including prize-winning vineries, follow principles based on these beliefs.
More modern descriptions of gnomes usually emphasize their bright red pointed hats, solid colored clothes, and the long white beard of the typical male. Though sightings of female gnomes are rarely reported, gnome women are generally thought to be beard-free.
The name ‘gnome’ is said to come from the Latin word ‘gnomus’ which is thought to possibly come from the Greek word ‘gnosis’ meaning “knowledge” (i.e. of hidden treasure), but is more likely rooted in the word ‘genomos’ meaning “earth dweller”
Gnome Legends Throughout the World
Gnomes are known by different names throughout different parts of Europe - for instance: they are called ‘barbegazi’ in Switzerland and France, ‘kaukis’ in Prussia, ‘leprechauns’ and ‘clurichauns’ in Ireland, ‘saunatonttu’ in Finland, ‘nisse’ or ‘tomte’ in Scandanavia, and ‘voettir’ in Iceland. Other parts of the world have traditions about very similar creatures. For example, in Japan magical beings such as ‘bakemono,’ ‘yokai,’ and ‘tengu’ are comparable to gnomes. In fairy tales and other European mythologies gnomes are often confused with goblins, dwarves, and even elves. Today gnomes continue to feature in a wide variety of literature and other media - ranging from Harry Potter to South Park to even being used as the name of computer systems and aircraft engines.
So how did these mythological-mystical beings end up inspiring the worldwide phenomena of garden gnome statues? Well I’m guessing that part of it was because of the legend that they turned to stone when caught in Sunlight. But here’s the rest of the story…
The Origin and Spread of Modern Garden Gnomes
Garden gnome statues as we know them today were first created in the mid-1800s by Phillip Griebel, a sculptor of terracotta animals in the town of Graefenroda in Thuringia, Germany. Gnome legends were especially popular in Germany and Griebel made his gnome statues so that people could better enjoy the myths and stories of gnomes who tended to gardens at night. These first garden gnomes were molded from terracotta clay then dried, fired in a kiln, and finally painted. Garden gnomes soon became very popular and several companies rose up to produce them. Gnome production in Germany dropped back sharply in World War II and today almost all manufacturers of garden gnome statues are located in China and Poland. But even today Phillip Griebel’s descendants continue to produce gnomes in Germany where they are the last manufacturer carrying on the tradition there.
The popularity of garden gnomes began to spread across the world soon after their creation. In 1847, returning from his travels in Germany, Sir Charles Isham brought twenty-one terracotta gnomes back to his home in the United Kingdom. Only one of these twenty-one original gnome immigrants to England survives today. Known as “Lampy” this centenarian-plus gnome is still kept on display and is insured for one million pounds! With their reputation expanding out from Germany, garden gnomes soon became popular across Europe and particularly in England and France, where gardening is looked upon as a very serious undertaking. Today of course Garden Gnomes have become a familiar sight around the world.
Garden Gnome Controversy and the "Liberation" Movement
Though they are generally appreciated and enjoyed by garden enthusiasts and the public at large there has been some controversy and conflict has begun to rise up around these short stone garden watchmen. The high-status Chelsea garden show held in London, England has banned garden gnomes leading to claims that the show organizers are being snobbish and classist as the gnomes are particularly popular in working class neighborhoods. But the better known garden gnome controversy revolves around the increasingly popular movement of gnome “liberation.”
Apparently loosely modeled around animal rights movements such as the Animal Liberation Front (ALF), these various individual and group efforts to “liberate” garden gnomes from their garden homes claim that gnomes are unjustly imprisoned and treated cruelly by their human “owners.” Though it is difficult to precisely determine their numbers and exact tactics, the largest and most organized of these liberation groups appear to be centered in Europe. Each of these organization has their own unique approach to how they achieve gnome “freedom.” The best known of these liberation groups, France’s Front de Libération des Nains de Jardin (FLNJ), releases gnomes into local forests – which the Front claims is natural gnome habitat.
Especially lucky liberated gnomes are even taken on globe-spanning travels to exotic locations. Sometimes travel photos are sent back to gnomes’ past owners to point out how a gnome should be treated. In some cases a traveling gnome may even come back to its reformed owner, in some cases accompanied by a new wife and children. This kind of ‘traveling gnome prank’ was recently popularized by the movie Amelie and helped to inspire Travelocity’s ‘Roaming Gnome’ advertisements.
In contrast Italy’s highly organized and violent Movimento Autonomo per la Liberazione delle Anime da Giardino (MALAG or ‘Garden Gnome Liberation Front’), takes a more extreme approach and actually smashes these innocent terracotta gnome beings in primitive pagan-like ritual through which the group claims to “release the gnome spirit.”
Gnome Liberators Here in Oregon!?
Much more close to home, in our own beloved state of Oregon, there is a grassroots group centered only a little south in Corvallis which takes a somewhat more peaceful and communicative approach: instead of just abducting or crushing gnomes this group first leaves gnome owners a letter explaining how their gnomes are being treated cruelly and offering the owner a chance to hand their statuary friend over peacefully.
Strangely the federal government has yet to label gnome liberators as ‘terrorists’ although it seems to consider animal liberation groups to be among the most dangerous of domestic activist organizations aggressively handing out lifetime sentences and million dollar fines to even minor offenders…?.
Besides the direct action gnome liberation groups mentioned above, there are also legitimate political organizations working for gnome rights and freedom. Again, the largest of these organizations is in France: the Mouvement d´Émancipation des Nains de Jardin (MENJ), while ‘Free The Gnomes’ is the non-violent and legal branch of Italy’s infamous MALAG (Garden Gnome Liberation Front). The MENJ well represents almost all garden gnome liberation organizations with their view that gnomes have an inalienable right to free – just as do humans and that it’s very wrong to force gnomes to stand in gardens without pay and without their stated consent – regardless of whether the gnomes are put their merely to serve as ornamentation or for some other allegedly more meaningful purpose.
Beyond these direct action gnome liberation groups and their legal counterparts there are newly emerging sanctuaries for gnomes recovering from their time in enforced servitude – where they can live out the remainder of their lives in nature and in peace. The European Gnome Sanctuary in Barga, Italy has served as such a sanctuary since 1999.
Our Work Against Gnome Oppression
We here at Just Say Gnome! are proud of the fact that we provide only gnomes who are very well-informed about and comfortable with their future careers as garden residents. In fact they all eagerly anticipate making a personal contribution to whatever garden or house they may find themselves in. Whether it’s the Garden Om’s meditative vision of spreading peaceful vibrations through your yard and home, or Garden Gnome Chomsky’s patient and self-assured enthusiasm for raising the political awareness of your family and all visitors to your home, you can be well-assured that our gnomes are very happy – even blissful – with their lot in life!
As our business grows we hope to donate a portion of our earnings to existing gnome sanctuaries or even begin one of our own. Of course despite the good treatment of our gnomes we are still concerned that well-meaning gnome liberators might not realize this difference and may still try to abduct your Neo Gnome. With this concern in mind we have been contemplating the development of special security enhanced gnomes with extra concrete and rebar rooting devices and possibly even electronic gnome surveillance security systems. If this is a special concern to you please contact us about these developments. For the time being – whether you have lost gnomes recently or in the more distant past – you may find the international database “Gnomes Without Homes” useful as it provides a place to post photos and information about missing gnomes and sometimes gnome abductors use it to post travel photos of gnomes they are escorting around the world.
copyright S. Herrington 2007
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