The Official Messenger of the Great Cosmic Bunny: parlo di me
Chi sono:
The Great Cosmic Bunny
Created this universe
for its personal entertainment
And nothing more...
In The Beginning
The universe (this time-space) contained nothing but the Great Cosmic Bunny.
"And the Great Cosmic Bunny did break the silence of space with the words Koom-By Ya" (the book of the bunny, chapter 1, verse 1)
Properly translated "Koom-By Ya" means “come by here”. The Great Cosmic Bunny was speaking to all of the mass, which it deemed necessary for this universe. Upon the great one’s utterance an astronomical amount of extremely compact matter appeared exactly in its location, and expanded (the big boom)!
Why?
The Great Cosmic Bunny’s previous universe had been perfect, and because of which exceedingly boring. Leaving its perfect universe in the hands of a lesser deity; the great one created this universe for its personal entertainment. More specifically the Bunny wants a barrage of planets containing a high population of intelligent, creative and emotional creatures (us) so it may watch and be amused.
Everyday billions of people (on this planet alone) live their separate and intertwined existence. We are the Great Cosmic Bunny’s never-ending source of comedy, drama, tragedy, romance, aesthetics and music.
Your Responsibilities
Nothing, just live
No Commandments
There are still natural consequences for your actions, just not from the bunny’s intervention. The Great Cosmic Bunny does not give a damn! (in both meanings of the phrase) The great one does not care if you are perfect and it does not damn people. This is not a test.
Prayer
The great bunny does not answer prayers, So don’t bother. But the bunny does hear you... and laughs.
Afterlife
The Great Cosmic Bunny has decided to leave this a mystery.
If the great bunny revealed what happens to us after we die, we would no longer come up with creative hypotheses on the subject. That would deprive the bunny of a tremendous source of amusement.
WHY A BUNNY?
The bunny is merely the great cosmic one's preferred form. The bunny is the only divinely inspired creature on this planet (but it is not perfect; perfection is not the great one's goal). The average human chauvinists believe that their God is a MAN. This belief is a very arrogant one. You are not perfect; you have pimples and toe hair.
EVOLUTION OR CREATION
It should not be a big surprise to learn that you are a product of evolution. The great cosmic one's only intervention in your evolution was a little stirring of the primordial ooze (the initial spark of life on earth). Having billions of planets (within countless galaxies) to observe, the Great Cosmic Bunny did not have to create you with a puff of smoke. The great one only pays attention to a planet after creative, intelligent and emotional life arises (apart from the occasional dinosaur battle). Sorry, Earth is not the center of the cosmos.
Is This Pamphlet Serious?
You never know with the Bunny.
Blasphemy
Blasphemy is in fact encouraged because it brings the bunny further amusement. You can blame the great one for the bad things that happen in your life, but its not the Great Bunny’s fault, for the Bunny does not intervene; this is a spectator sport. But by all means curse the Great Cosmic Bunny for laughing at you when so ever the Bunny has a cause to do so, because you can rest assured that the great one is at least chuckling.
Is the great one all knowing?
By use of it’s infinite mind the great Bunny could calculate future outcomes. The great Bunny has decided against knowing the future; live entertainment is so much more amusing. The cosmic one is not trying to prevent anything from happening and has the patience to wait out what will come to pass.
Bunnyism
This pamphlet is the gospel in its entirety short and sweet. A deity should not have to take up thousands of pages in order to convey some message.
NOTE
The maker of this pamphlet is not to be considered any sort of profit/prophet.
He is only the messenger.
Questions, Comments and/or Condemnations
Send to Rev.Caden Simmons at
Cfs4@dana.ucc.nau.edu
Spread the message...
For the bunny desires to observe the ways we reject the truth.
Mi piacerebbe conoscere: Leonardo De Vinci, Pu-tai, George Bernard Shaw, A Smurf, Samuel Clemens, any girl named Olivia or Viola, A barber, a baker and a candlestick maker stranded at sea, emperor Marcus Aurelius, any girl named Zoot, Jane Austin and Bruce lee.
Spazio amici di The Official Messenger of the Great Cosmic Bunny (Top 8)
The Official Messenger of the Great Cosmic Bunny ha 141 amici.
All hail the Cosmic Bunny in all his fuffy goodness! Cause otherwise, I might have gone and given someone the finger at work today. Thank you for existing with your lovely sense of humor!
