Christopher Robinson

*THINGS LEFT UNSAID*
It’s funny, what you never miss
Until it’s gone.
You say she had so much going for her
But waited till she died to tell her.
Sometimes the things said mean less
Than the things not said.
And you lost your chance to speak.

*WRITTEN APOLOGIES*
She never said she wanted this
She never said she didn’t
But her eyes filled with tears
And her wrists smeared with blood
She says she’s sorry for all the pain
She’s sorry for not being perfect
She’s sorry for ever being born
And she’s sorry for the tears you may cry
She never said she was going to do this
She never promised she wouldn’t
And if she did, it’s a promise she couldn’t keep
Her eyes are filled with the sorrow
She never spoke in her lifetime
And the blood is filled with all the pain
She never let bleed from her before
But she’s pure now and clean
Of everything that ever went wrong
And she says she’s sorry one thousand times over
Drawn in her blood on scraps of paper
Scattered about her room
She’s sorry for everything

*DECIEVING*
smile for you
Fake but flawless
I laugh for you
Perfected over time
And you can’t even tell
The difference anymore
My eyes glow
But not with happiness
But from tears
That I forced to stop falling
I lied to you
Told you I was ok
You didn’t even think
To question it

*BALLERINA*
You take me in your arms
And spin me like a ballerina
Your hands upon my waist
Don't let go
Cause I’m falling for you
You lift me off my feet
A little closer to heaven
Your face so close to mine
Don't drop me
Cause I’m falling for you
I wrap my arms around you
Putting my life in your hands
But I trust you
Don't stop spinning me
Because I love you
And this is as close to heaven
As I’d ever hoped to be

*SUFFOCATION*
Can I drown the pain away
Swallow the pills down quickly
Gallon of water to help them down
Drown my sorrows in drugs
That are supposed to make this easy
But it isn’t getting any easier
The world looks so dark now
No light no hope in sight
The pills are stuck in my throat
And I’m dying slowly
I don't know if I’m choking
Or if I’m just drowning and can’t breathe
But the sun has stopped shinning
And my eyes are pleading for air
Drowning myself in my sorrows
Drowning my sorrows in drugs
That are supposed to make this easy
But it isn’t getting any easier

*BATHROOM HOUR-GLASS*
Time passes so slowly
Like the drips of my faucet
As I sit on the tile floor
And watch the tears fall
In a rhythm of pain
I watch the sun set
Out side my window
Casting shadows
On the bathroom wall
I try to catch the tears
Before they fall
But have no luck
And I’ve given up
And I listen as the water
Ticks away time
All to slowly

*WELCOMING WITH A KISS*
Should I die slowly?
Feel every moment of pain
Kiss death upon the lips
Welcome it with open arms
The same arms
That once welcomed you

*TEARS*
Torrents of tears,
Cascade down my cheeks,
Salty kisses upon my lips,
A flicker of hope in my eyes,
Dies and fades to tears

*STAR LIGHT, STAR BRIGHT*
Wishing on a star
That’s fading fast
Wishing I could be with you
That this could last
But even the brightest star
Fades into the black
Even love so strong
Just doesn’t always last

*UNTIL (YOU'RE GONE)*
You’re the sun that doesn’t shine
When the sky cries tears of pain
You’re the bird that doesn’t sing
Because it’s locked in a cage
You’re everything that’s beautiful
Yet unappreciated till it’s gone

*NO SIGN OF YOU*
I feel the last of the fire flicker out
Leaving only charred wood and coal
And as the morning wind blows the last sign of life
I feel my heart turn cold
The wind pierces my chest
Like a thousand knives
I pull the blanket tighter
Not to protect my self from the cold
For the cold has already reached my heart
But to keep what life I have left inside
The love we had was no different than this very fire
And I’m what you left behind
The charred wood and used coal
No longer recognizable
And my heart crumbles like sandstone
As I think of your last words
Think of our last kiss
The kiss that sucked my very soul
Leaving me empty, useless, alone
My heart once a blazing fire
Filled with love and passion
Now a mass of blackened dust
But you,
Like a passing cloud you drifted away
Leaving my limp body looking up
Trying to follow you with my eyes
Finding shapes in the sky
But no sign of you

*OBLIGATION*
Do you cry because you care?
Or just because you think it would be wrong to laugh
Do you hear what I am saying?
Or are you just looking in my general direction
Do you have something in your eye?
Or are those tears for me
A gift you felt obliged to give
Since I’ve given them to you so many times before

*RED: THE COLOR OF LOVE*
I wrote a poem for you
But I ripped it to shreds
And threw it at the sky
Screaming to the heaven’s
The anguish I felt inside.
Unfortunately
I can not say it helped
Because my tears are still falling
On the snow at my feet
Melting the world around me
Tearing my heart to shreds.
I wrote you a poem
It told you how I felt
Exactly how I wished I could say it.
But I tore it up
In the mood of the moment
It was all I could think to do.
And now I'm left with nothing
No explanation to my madness.
No excuse for my tears
Only pain inside and out.
As I see you point and stare
All of you, so heartless.
And so, even without my poem
Without that last goodbye
I worked so hard to write
I take my life.
Not for pity
Because I see that in your eyes
But because I do more bad than good.
And the snow is filled with blood
Red the color of love
Now surrounds me
And for the first time
I'm surrounded by love.

*DREAMS OF ME AND YOU*
In my dreams
It was me in your arms
My lips on yours
In my dreams
There was no her
There was only us
And the clouds
And the stars
It was the world and us
But we were together
So it was us against the world
But in your arms I could take it
Anything the world dished out
And with your kisses I was strong again
In my dreams it was me in your arms
My lips on yours
But in reality
It’s always been her

*RAIN DANCE*
I notice that a storm is on its way
And I welcome it with open arms
And as the rain begins to fall
I reach out my hands to the heavens
And dance beneath the torrents
Singing a song of pain
Into the drops of silver rain
I watch as the sky opens up
And the rain cascades down my body
Forming streams along my body
Tracing the curves of my back and front
And I spin beneath the clouds
Like a pinwheel in the wind
And sing until my throat hurts
Till the cold air stings my chest
I dance until my legs give out
And I fall into the puddles on the ground
And I scream into the silence
The pain I feel inside
As I watch the rain carry my tears away

*PAID MY DEBT IN TEARS*
I couldn’t count the times you’ve been there for me, and I couldn’t count the times you’ve cared, but I couldn’t count the times my tears have been for you either. I couldn’t count the times you’ve made me smile, or the times you’ve made me laugh, but I couldn’t count the times you’ve made me wish I were so much more for you. So many tears have fallen in your name, so many poems with you in mind, so many wishes said for your well being and so many hearts with your name within. You’ve been my life, my world, my savior even. I owed so much to you. But I’ve paid my debt in tears.

*FORBIDDEN WALTZES*
The moon casts shadows on my floor
Dancing midnight waltzes on the walls
Forbidden darkness mixed with love and light
Mingle into one in the covers of my bed
And we dance our own midnight dance
Me so close to you I can feel your heart beat
And I can watch the shadows play tag on the walls
As you play tag along my body sending chills
Like a child exploring you search my body
Learning ever inch of my skin with your fingertips
And I hold you close not wanting to let this go
And we dance our secret dance by moonlight
Joining the shadows on the floor in their mystery
A secret kept by darkness and moonbeams
And we dance our midnight dance by moonlight
And fall asleep in each other’s arms
Watching the shadows dance
Forbidden waltzes on the walls

*NO WILL TO DANCE*
The darkness in his eyes ward me off
A knife gleams in his hand, and spins and shines
His face stone cold and focused on its beauty
He sits in the corner alone and desolate
Away from the world
Surrounded by his own troubled thoughts
He seriously thinks about his life
And wonders if its worth it
He spins the knife gently
Letting the light from the moon strike it
In his own little corner he raises the knife
Taking it in his right hand
Placing it gently on his left wrist
A girl walks by on the way to the dance floor
He doesn’t even raise his eyes
His mind thinks of only one thing
His wrist, the blood,
The pain that will soon drip away
The knife penetrates the skin
As blood drips on the hotel carpet
A Passerby pauses to speak to him
He looks up with his dark eyes
And it leaves with out a word
The blood beads on his arm
Glistening in the moonlight
But the pain doesn’t go with it as it drips to the floor
The pain bulges in his veins
Pushing its way out through the gash
But only blood leaves the cut
The hurt of heartache still throbs in his chest
And in his head thoughts tumble and crash
Making every thing seem wrong
Ever word jumbled and confused
The night goes on
Others dance and laugh
As the cold eyes peer from the corner
A knife laced with blood by the figure’s side

*ASHES*
The ashes fall around us
In a flame filled rain
Singeing my skin
Burning at my flesh
Hot red kisses
Like the ones you give me
Eating me in ecstasy
Leaving me burnt and scarred
Leaving your mark
As the one
Who kissed with fire
On his lips
The one who burned
My innocence in his flames
With a burning passion
I could never explain
So even after your gone
I rub my cheeks
And feel the scars you left on me
With your red hot kisses
And love falls to ashes at my feet

*FOLK LORE*
Distance makes the heart grow fonder
So I’ll leave you behind
In hopes distance will make you realize
Just what you’re missing
Distance makes the heart grow fonder
So I’ll leave you miles behind
In hopes you’ll love me someday