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Jimmy The Homeless
Crunk

Where I come when I am ANGRY!




United Kingdom

Profile Views:  5161




Last Login:  8/11/2008
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   Jimmy The Homeless: General Info
Member Since5/22/2006
Band MembersJimmy & the lord god jesus
InfluencesMy Dick, my balls, my heart, my brain. In that order, for better or worse.
Record LabelDick-Headonism


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Suicide Girls: What a load of Wank!  (view more)

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67...68...69...DONE!  (view more)

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Why your band are shite.  (view more)

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   About Jimmy The Homeless


Why Your Band Are Shite: 1. Don't sing in an "American" accent, even if you are American...Use your own accent! 2. Don't do covers...They are a/Shit b/Too Difficult. (Thank you Malcolm Mclaren) 3. Don't have the word BABY in any of your songs unless you are Dianna Ross or the Pipettes. 4. Don't have the word SOUL in your song unless you are James Brown. 5. Don't do FUNK unless your name is Bootsy. 6. No excuse exists for using a harmonica or saxaphone. 7. Digery fuckin' don't! 8. Don't sing with your eyes closed....you look like a twat. 9. You don't have "The Blues" what you have is a Fender Strat' that your daddy bought you, now fuck off. 10. Don't do songs about drugs unless you are Shane McGowan or Shaun Ryder. 11. When no one is interested in your music, it doesn't mean you are Antifolk or Avant Garde it means you are shit...go back to the bedroom and have a re-think. 12. Be nice to the Sound People...manners are free and they are paying for their sins by being forced to listen to your shit! 13. Don't say "Thanks!" untill someone claps. 14. Don't appologise for anything on stage. If you make a mistake, do it again and pretend you meant it. 15. Never blame the audience. It's not their job to listen, it's your job to entertain (Does not apply in London where all Audiences are cunts.) 16. Guitar solos....mmmmmmh, just remember "Anyone can play guitar" 17. Jazz has melody, Noise is just noise...go write a fucking tune! 18. Tune up BEFORE you go on stage. 19. Don't bore the audience with anecdotes unless you are either a) naturally very funny or b) Calvin Johnson (Thank you Electric Honey from the Plan B forum.) 20. "Making things more organic" is great if you're making vegetable soup but disastorous in song-writing. (Thank you Paul Hawkins)

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Jimmy The Homeless's Friends Comments
Displaying 25 of 39 comments  ( View All | Add Comment )
InSession

InSession



Aug 27 2008 1:01 AM

All recorded music has run its course.
It has all been consumed, traded, downloaded, understood, heard before, sampled, learned, revived, judged and found wanting.
Dispense with all previous forms of music and start again.
YEAR ZERO NOW
............LIFE IS SHORT!
Only listen to music written, recorded or released in the previous twelve months by composers, soloists or emsembles who have never released music in any format at any time previous to the last twelve months.
The Purple Gang

The Purple Gang



Jun 6 2007 2:38 PM

Hey, Jimmy, how's it going?

Chuck a pebble into the sea for us, will ya? Having first made sure that no-one's in the firing line, of course.

We hope to see you on the road soon, maybe just before it reaches the end of Madeira Drive.

the Purple Gang.
Simple Folk Radio

Simple Folk Radio



May 13 2007 3:54 PM

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
Amy Alexander

Amy Alexander



Apr 28 2007 5:12 AM

Ever wanted to track the people who look at your page?
Check It


Paul

Paul



Apr 1 2007 9:25 AM

mad jimmy lol @ your songs :)

great stuff, when u coming back for your annual beatdown?
Amy Alexander

Amy Alexander



Mar 20 2007 8:48 AM

Yo! Jimmy! How are you?
Mentalist association

Mentalist association



Feb 20 2007 8:15 PM



LMHR London

LMHR London



Feb 15 2007 10:35 AM

Lethal Bizzle, Drew McConnell (Babyshambles), Hardkaur, Sam Duckworth (Get Cape Wear Cape Fly) and Jerry Dammers (ex The Specials) will join other artists and anti-racists from around the country at the Unite Against Fascism / Love Music Hate Racism conference in London this Saturday.
See you there?



Click for info

Long

Long



Jan 2 2007 2:04 AM

Hey Jimmy! Happy Newyear, hope you have a good one mate
dom/boma/blinky/audrey/ben fogle/phil tuffnell

dom/boma/blinky/audrey/ben fogle/phil tuffnell



Nov 30 2006 6:14 PM

evenin ye scottish shithouse :P

gonna try and make it saturday hopefully... i'll have a whiskey with you and get you sleeping in my bath again lol
Amy Alexander

Amy Alexander



Nov 29 2006 2:58 AM

hey jimmy, how are you?
hey how come everytime i put my music box on shuffle, the bobby mcgees appear 4 or 5 times?? there may be 69 songs, but how many hidden tracks have you snuck on?
xx
Amy Alexander

Amy Alexander



Oct 27 2006 9:02 AM

you gonna have to pay me £10 an hour for that privilege!!!
bumpoowilly

bumpoowilly



Sep 16 2006 10:50 AM

barrie alderton is putting an almost unbelievable amount of effort into preventing us from living near you, jimmy. it will happen, though. i'm going to sit outside your front door every night and cry gently until it does.
The King Blues

The King Blues



Aug 29 2006 12:38 PM

thanks fi di add!

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Album out now! Available from www.kingblues.com
Beans on Toast

Beans on Toast



Jul 25 2006 5:55 PM

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Amy Alexander

Amy Alexander



Jul 20 2006 10:23 AM

Hey Jimmy
I would very much like to get a copy of '68 love songs and a poem about shagging'. any chance of swapping the new sweethearts album for a copy??
ciao x
Invokal - Verbalist Journalist

Invokal - Verbalist Journalist



Jul 18 2006 8:11 PM

nxt Anti-Pop is sunday 30th july at the Globe. Its the final round b4 the grand final so bring lots of peeps!!! + There's free ice-cream on the night!!!
DARK HORSES

DARK HORSES



Jul 17 2006 7:36 PM

Mr Jimmy Please oh Please send me a copy of your masterpiece!
Hope your both chipper, sorry I aint been to see ya or nuffin, we been away and working super hard.
Lets catch up soon, when is the next turd night?xx
bumpoowilly

bumpoowilly



Jul 17 2006 6:53 PM

i need a copy. i was going to come and watch your ukefest tonight but i think i've screwed myself in the ass by sleeping for about 15 hours. i had weird sleep paralysis while chris was in my room on my computer. that was thoroughly unpleasant.
Pirate Magazine

pirate magazine



Jul 15 2006 6:08 PM

Cool...i want a copy right away, erica says she will be your poetry brothel madam and we're going on a picnic at devil's dyke tommorow, are you and Eleanor up for coming?x
Alex Clara Day

Alex Clara Day



Jul 15 2006 5:55 PM

Brilliant!
x
Misterlee

Misterlee



Jul 15 2006 4:29 PM

[Misterlee quickly wipes his nose on the sails and runs the plank, then, to camera...]
"Thanks for your friendship Jimmy The Homeless!"
winston echo

winston echo



Jul 15 2006 3:43 PM

tthanks
i llllook forward to it
Jocky Venkataraman

Jocky Venkataraman



Jun 30 2006 10:22 PM

When's the solo album out Jimmy?

And d'ya fancy going busking sometime? We could meet up somewhere neutral like Manchester, and have a Scottish jingler busk-off.

Good luck with the shit, as they say.
Elin Green.

elin green



Jun 17 2006 10:55 PM

Downloaded a couple. Diolch.
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