A waiter taps my shoulder. "Can I interest you in a refill, sir?"
I stretch. I've been here for four hours. I've had six cups of coffee. I've written nothing. I've watched people come and go, and listened to them talking, but nothing inspired me to write.
I shrug. "Sure, why not?" I say.
The waiter wasn't being polite. He was being pushy. He wants me to leave.
Music
I can see her lips moving. I don't know what she's saying. I can't place the language.
I'm in Wiesbaden, Germany. I'm trying to remember where my sister said she'd meet me. I'm lost. I'm in the Turkish part of town. Every window smells like roasted lamb. The shops pour techno calls to prayer and light from their vibrant neon signs. Electric minarets hurt when you're intoxicated.
This beautiful woman looks at me like I'm lost. I am lost. She says something, and it's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard in my life. I have no idea what she said.
I try my best to find common ground. "Bitte," I say, "Kannst du English oder Deutsch sprechen?"
The girl cocks her head. She curses in French. She smiles, flips me off, and walks away.
Movies
One time I listened in on this semi-famous indie director on a date with a psychology graduate student at this cafe. The director just kept talking and talking about this movie about autism.
The psychology student told the director about this patient of hers with autism who killed himself.
The director said, "That's really sad." Then, he talked about his friend editing the film score with this look on his face like he had been interrupted.
Television
We're bored out of our minds. We're channel surfing, me and my dog. I ask her if she wants to do something. The dog just lies there, like she's dead.
I'll watch anything, but I don't want to watch anything.
I keep searching.
Books
don’t believe everything you read
because writers will lie to you
our worlds want answers in our minds
sometimes we just
just say what sounds good enough
like with lovers, usually
what gets us through the night
by tomorrow, no one remembers exactly
anyway
anyway, i always tell the truth
you can
trust me.
Heroes
I met Jesus Christ once. He smelled like the apocalypse.
I don't think it was really Jesus, but you never know, do you?
Would you believe my town doesn't have a bookstore, fine or otherwise?
And the local coffeeshop didn't want to display GUD Issue 0 because the cover was too disturbing... nor Issue 1 because the content was too adult (for the dance folks of all ages a door or two down).
Thanks for the add! GUD (pronounced "good") is a print/pdf magazine of 200 pages of genre and literary fiction, poetry, and a splash of art; now on our third issue. :) See our profile for information on reviews, freebies, and submission guidelines!
Naw, didn't mean to sound like I was bitching. The whole point for me is that the times you're not in love with somebody are just as important as the times you are. They present their own sorts of challenges. Good challenges, though. Ones you're better off learning how to deal with. I like where I am right now. Got the rest of my life to be in love with somebody.
I checked on your webpage for that signing, and didn't see when you are holding it. So, uh, when are you holding that one? It is a bit non-central for most of the folks I know, although there are a few directly in that area. So I might be able to snag some for it. All depends on the timing. :)
In the meantime, an unknown-sized group of us are going to BJ's Brewhouse in Addison tonight, 6:00. We'll be there for a while, and then are going rollerskating in Plano (it's a Skate Party!)(apparently the organizer of this party thinks it is a good idea to get drunk before we skate).
Your welcome to drop by if you want some free beer, on me (not literally on me, but more in the monetary sense)(just to clarify)(because pouring beer on me would be a waste of good beer).
