i am sober
i am introverted
I am neurotic
i am fickle
i am a photic sneezer
i am a cat person
i am a dreamer
i am a creature of habit
i am an aquarius
i am not cool
i am not talented
out of all the 6,706,993,152 people on this planet, i have found the one that i belong to. he has changed my life so much. he makes me thankful for every single day of my life. and we are very fortunate for what we have. no one has made me cry more, and no one has made me laugh more than him. you couldnt even begin to comprehend the amount of love we have for eachother. i never thought that i would deserve someone like him. and whats more important to me is that i know a side of him that no one else will ever know. i know that no one will ever hug him like i do. no one else will ever see his face when they wake up every morning. and no one will ever wear a ring on their finger that says "i am his, and he is mine, and nothing will ever change that" and after all this time, i am still waiting to wake up. it all feels too good to be true..june.11.2008.
he will always be my bear, and i will always be his kitten.
I can't beieive it's been so long already.
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10FEB 20th birthday! 5MAR tim burtons alice in wonderland comes out!!!! 11JUN 2 year anniversary! 18JUN toy story 3!!!!
i need more things to do.
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i like to think that in my past life, i was a cat. You don't want to get to know me
this is your life, and its ending one minute at a time. You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everything else. We are all part of the same compost heap. We are the all singing, all dancing, crap of the world.
im jordan. I think too much. i don't act my age, and i don't look it either. i have secrets. i beleive dreams have a meaning and purpose. everything has a meaning. if i told you "music is my life", you wouldn't understand. not only do i listen to music. but i create it. i am not obsessed. i am inspired. i am not a musician. im an artist. i do not listen. i analyze.
i am what i am, judge me if you will. but i know what kind of person i have become, after 19 years of finding myself. you can try to impress all you want, become popular in high school, and make friends with every kid. but when high school is over, and you are put out in the real world, none of that matters anymore. i have stopped trying to impress people, trying to make friends, and trying to make people happy.
i am not going to sit here, and tell you that i am an individual. look at me, i am different! i am unique! no. we are all people, doing the exact same fucking thing. no one is unique, so stop trying so hard. we all want the same thing out of life.
i am much smarter than you think, and i have been through a lot in my life. i have made a lot of mistakes that i am not proud of. but i love the person that i have become.
i have too many words.
every teenager on the planet claims to be a photographer, artist, or musician. i am not claiming these things. you can pick up a camera, but it doesnt make you a photographer. you can pick up a pencil, but it doesnt make you an artist. you can pick up a guitar, but that doesnt make you a musician. you can throw a bunch of clothes together, but that doesnt make you a fashionista. get over yourselves. i do not claim to be a photographer, artist, musician, style expert, individual, or anything like that. i just do what i love, and i am who i am.
this girl is in love, and my life is a fairytale. i am not the same person anymore. i have grown up a lot, more than i ever thought i would. i have learned to make better choices for myself. honestly, im a really awkward person. sometimes i can be a bit socially retarded. but I am trying, really. im not really sure what my future holds for me. i may never grow up or be a career woman. everyone wants to be successful. everyone wants to be famous. they all want to make something out of themselves. but i just want to be happy. i have lots of fears, some rational, and some irrational. i feel safe inside my shell. i am small. and i understand that. usually, its the first thing people point out when they meet me. i act like a child a lot, but that does not mean that im not grown up and responsible for myself. i will more than likely get overexcited at something that seems completely irrelevant. i know that i am a lot smarter than most 20 year olds. and i am a lot smarter than you might think, so dont underestimate me. go ahead and judge me. i dont need to impress anyone, especially someone over the internet.
april.4.2008 since the day i was created, i have had the same skin, eyes, and heart. for eighteen years. 6396 days. isnt it amazing to think about that? i have learned so much about this thing called "life". i know much more than i did 17 years ago. 10 years ago. 5 years ago. one year ago. one hour ago. every moment of every day that i live, i hear something that my ears have never heard before. i say something that has never left my mouth before. i experience something new each time i open my eyes for the first time in the morning, and live my life. i like asking those questions that seem impossible to answer. complexity makes me think harder, and makes my imagination grow. how many days have you been alive? have many days have you been living on this planet? does it scare you to know that you are a part of something so much larger than yourself? i am going to die. you are going to die. whether it be a week from now, or 50 years from now. does that make your heart beat a bit faster in that chest of yours? i have begun asking myself more and more of these questions during this reclusive state that i have been in for some time now. i do not, however, posses the answers. i ask these questions to others, in hopes of finding real truth. but maybe some things are meant to be an eternal mystery. i like being asked questions though. ask me anything, and i will answer truthfully. we should not be afraid of our truths. in my eyes, flaws are beautiful. imperfections are what make us humans, therefor, making us perfect. scars are beautiful to me. it reminds me that we have the ability to heal. oh, what a delicate tangled web we weave. i have always hated that saying, as it is so disgustingly vague. but i think i am beginning to understand it more and more. i think it is remarkable how i cannot understand things that come so easily to most of us. yet i want to know whether ghosts are real, or why our bodies allow us to cry. my thoughts are peculiar, and at times, almost childlike. my mind is abstract, but this is jordan. and although i have changed and molded into this person, this being, that i am today, i am still the same person i was 6396 days ago.
Haha, yeah, it was a silly idea. But hey.. It floats some people's boat, so who am I to judge? Haha :p
I KNOW! It's horrible. :( Everything we always plan ends up happening south of where I'm living, so we don't have any need to go up there usually. At least not enough need to spend the amount of money it takes to get up there. Haha. But I'm talking Trent into maybe going up there to go to the Zoo, so hopefully that'll happen soon! :D Or hopefully Patty Cake goes on tour again soon and doesn't skip good 'ol Oregon this time around! Haha
yeah, if you stayed for the triller there was one in the front with a giant werewolf head. hmm really? the blood i have doesn't stain at all besides the bit thats still under my nails.
I have such a great story for you. I heard this from a girl that knows this girl. Its true! I hope I tell it right.
So this girl went to a bar and hooked up with this guy. About a week or later she went to the doctor because her throat hurt. The doctor said I need you to tell me who you slept with and the girl said uh why does that matter and he said because you have maggots in your throat and theres only 2 ways you can get that (the first I dont remember) the second is someone you slept with has had sex with a dead person. Turns out the guy she slept with was a mortician and had eggs on his dick and when she ya know....she got them in her throat.
okay so i just called tmobile, twice. for the people that got their service restored they arent going to get the 100 dollar gift card. you should probably call and bitch at them but be nice. and they are going to credit my account for 20 dollars for the internet failing at life. and if i dont get my contacts back then they will do more for me but we just have to wait it out. and microsoft is making a list of people who lost all their shit and sending it to tmobile so they will get the gift cards.
moosehatjo
out of all the 6,706,993,152 people on this planet, i have found the one that i belong to. 
he has changed my life so much. he makes me thankful for every single day of my life. and we are very fortunate for what we have. no one has made me cry more, and no one has made me laugh more than him.
you couldnt even begin to comprehend the amount of love we have for eachother. i never thought that i would deserve someone like him. and whats more important to me is that i know a side of him that no one else will ever know. i know that no one will ever hug him like i do. no one else will ever see his face when they wake up every morning. 
and no one will ever wear a ring on their finger that says "i am his, and he is mine, and nothing will ever change that" and after all this time, i am still waiting to wake up. it all feels too good to be true..june.11.2008.
i am what i am, judge me if you will. but i know what kind of person i have become, after 19 years of finding myself. you can try to impress all you want, become popular in high school, and make friends with every kid. but when high school is over, and you are put out in the real world, none of that matters anymore. i have stopped trying to impress people, trying to make friends, and trying to make people happy. 
this girl is in love, and my life is a fairytale. i am not the same person anymore. i have grown up a lot, more than i ever thought i would. i have learned to make better choices for myself.
Online Now!
HAPPY HALLOWEEN 
