nursing crutches, isolating myself, staring through people, waiting at the train station pretending that i am being met.
chasing ghosts, trying to turn up the volume on whispers, petty theft, screwing corporations for small scores, being charming and obscene, living in the past, dreading the future and running from now.
i can't will myself happy.
stupid dangerous activities.
making messes, breaking bones, drinking gin and tonics, avoiding the early morning, asking mostly assholes if they want paper or plastic, sometimes wishing i lived on a desert island with a dog. i smile at babies and pinch my friends.
i am interested in learning about apathy and most socio-cultural trends. i like vegetarians, experimental theatre, europe.
NPR
taking sleeping pills, drinking copious amounts of caffeine. i love thunderstorms and sardonic humor. i hate the automobile industry and most of the U.S.'s foreign policies.
bell's brewery in michigan.
going to the south pacific for winter migration.
people who levitate interest me along with strip mall carnivals, i like to take pictures when they are in town. shopping carts and ambitious do-gooders are sources of wonder for me.
i don't really like hipsters or rich people. i desire those that have a compulsion to seek out words, their structure and sounds. if you are in love with words then we would probably be in love with each other.
Music
leonard cohen should've married me before i became an old lady, we would've been the saddest couple to ever live.
words, lyrics are my poison. i bet you can find them everywhere. bits and pieces of my musical support system. ani difranco has comforted me so many times, i find myself a testament with unconditional love for this familiar stranger.
dance with me.
reggae, hip hop, i like almost everything that isn't played on the radio.
anything that is good live. from noise to opera.
all of my musician friends who are amazing-particularly LANCE WHALEN
jeff buckley
atmosphere,
the upsetters
Brother Ali
the postal service
ani difranco-shut up she's talented
the neutral milk hotel
elliot smith
ween
duran duran
the pixies
the cure
charles mingus
thelonious monk
Nina Simone
the electrolene
sonic youth
jen wood
modest mouse
soul coughing
tori amos
dan bern
the eels
outkast
ryan adams
wilco
ben harper
starsailor
helms
the rolling stones
PJ Jarvey
Spearhead
David Bowie
Le Tigre
The smiths
radiohead
air
tom waits
sean paul
garag atrois
sleater kinney
bif naked
Patti Smith
lots and lots of reggae.
Movies
rent the science of sleep!
the maltese falcon. all david lynch films, party monster, requiem for a dream, gummo, city of god, maria full of grace, fassbinder films, Baz Luhrman's Romeo and Juliet, Bram Stoker's Dracula, the doom generation,personal velocity, and my personal favorite movies that you make yourself!
Television
okay, okay i am addicted to project runway. there are all so deliciously bitchy
sometimes i watch it when i don't have any other method of escape or i need to sleep. i like books more.
i do really missed charmed.
Books
anything written by margret atwood or pablo neruda, or toni morrison. the god of small things, A to Z's, the lovely bones, come and go molly snow, neon vernacular, the bell jar, anything by flannery O'Conner, a prayer for owen meany, the new hampshire hotel, a widow for one year, the world according to garp, anything by john irving, shit, i like all types of books. habermas, sztompka, chomsky, truman capote, j.d salinger, rumi, bell hooks, anais nin, henry miller, derrida, proust.
Heroes
i do love me some Obama!
Emily Howell and Bramble
if you are really yourself without shame or regret, its you.
About me: impenetrable and icy
i just keep moving my feet. i know where i'm going and it ain't where i've been.
i am callous, hard to get to know, selfish and demanding.
i am a thinker that is irrationally addicted to logic. if you are trying to convince me of something your numbers better be legit and your research has to be documented properly. i want to be able to follow your trail of thought, recreate your argument + probably throw it back at you for the psuedo intellectual crap that it is.
it all comes down to three things; music, self-destruction and growth... i make few promises, ask for distance and demand the sea when mountains are provided.
winter comes on swift feet...
I edited my profile with Thomas Myspace Editor V4.4 (www.strikefile.com/myspace)
Who I'd like to meet: somebody that doesn't lie to themselves. liars, thieves, prostitutes, junkies, those who cry wolf, anyone that is easily discarded without any emotional garbage left over.
someone who isn't searching for themselves.
god, so i can list the atrocities that happened on his watch and then kick the shit out of him and demand that the world be deleted.
mostly those that i am karmic-ally indebted too.the spiritual bill collectors are coming after me and i dunno what to do...
Mythological creatures like harpy's, the Greek/Roman gods, Isis or Ra, Guadaloupe, Kali, Satan, deities, etc.
ghosts, lost souls, monsters and the lonely.
dejected artists, clinical depressives, bi-poplars, neurotics, well, this is a good list.
if you read my profile and find interest in kinship here, its probably you who i want to meet. however, with that being said, if you aren't going to put any creative energy toward things, keep on keeping on.
Hey "big sis" sorry that I didnt get back to you sooner I get all my emails on my phone and its somewhat a pain in my ass to get back at ppl! So hows the bday weekend going for you? I took my niece out trick or treating and went out with dad mom and bro and partied then had to go to TN yesterday then a party last night and then my best friend went to jail cause her bf knocked her tooth out!! shoo lol that was about all my weekend
I'm sorry to hear that you didn't have a great birthday... :( Remember life is what we make it and it is full of possiblities... If you aren't happy with something, change it! :) I found myself in some rather unhappy situations after my mom died...I got through it all and changed the things in my life that I could so I could be happy and enjoy myself. You can do that too!!! I wish you all the best...Hope the pep-talk was okay..I'm just in a really upbeat mood :)
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