Those of you who are fans of The Fray, and those who aren't (I don't discriminate)...I just finished my latest parody song. It's a parody of "How to Save a Life," by The Fray. The actual song is also the theme song to Grey's Anatomy.
MY song is an anthem for all who have tried online dating. Check it out on my MySpace Music Page. It's called "Dating Freaks Online."
Here are the lyrics...ENJOY!!
"Dating Freaks Online"
It'd been so long since I'd been on a date.
I hate when friends set up blind dates.
The girls they pick couldn't tie a shoe.
I'd just stare discretely at their boobs.
My friends, they don't know what I like.
I said, "You're fired. Take a hike.
I'll find a soul mate on my own."
They laughed and hung up the phone.
So I decided to go on the world wide web
To find some love on the internet.
And I, I should have listened to my friends
Instead of dating freaks online.
The first girl, Kim, was super hot.
She liked to jog and climb rocks.
She was in amazing shape.
I found that out when I tried to escape.
I woke up, and I was chained to the bed.
She was in her climbing gear
Swinging over my head.
I prayed to God to help me.
Oh, I prayed to God to help me.
Asking why did I go on the world wide web
To find some love on the internet.
And I, I should have listened to my friends
Instead of dating freaks online.
Yes, I do regret the choice
To try again and get back on that horse.
The next girl was 52.
Her photo was when she was 22.
We met up at a hotel bar.
The woman was missing one of her arms.
She took out a case
Put her teeth inside
And introduced her husband by her side.
Why did I go on the world wide web
To find some love on the internet.
And I, I should have listened to my friends
Instead of dating freaks online.
Why did I go on the world wide web
To find some love on the internet.
And I should have stayed with my last girlfriend
Instead of dating freaks online.
Too many freaks online.
Some serious freaks online.
Why did I go on the world wide web
To find some love on the internet.
And I would have preferred to get stabbed in the eye
Than have to date those freaks online.
I would rather set myself aflame,
Drink blended bugs and monkey brains,
And peel my toe nails off one at a time
Than have to date those freaks online.
I hate those freaks online.
Don't ever date online.
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The contents of this blog are the senseless ramblings of Kevin Sage, and are the explicit property of Kevin Sage and the many voices that whisper these senseless thoughts into his head. Any attempt to copy and/or distribute this content is strictly encouraged, and to be honest, Kevin Sage would probably never even find out. Kevin Sage is an actor/comedian/singer, and is in no way qualified to offer expert advice or opinions on anything, but is more than willing to answer any question you may. If you have a question or topic you'd like discussed, please send them to Kevin Sage at kevin@kevinsage.com. And if you'd like to further explore the twisted mind of Kevin Sage visit www.kevinsage.com