Collecting "Homies" and leaving them in random places ... like on top of the condom machine in a bar bathroom.
Music
Movies
Pretty much any zombie movie ever made (as long as the zombies are shambling corpses, not fast-moving freaks of nature), Dazed and Confused, The Goonies, The Monster Squad, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Clerks, Gremlins, PCU, Mermaids, Sixteen Candles, Point Break, Mr. Holland's Opus, Muriel's Wedding, Reality Bites, Dead Alive, Hocus Pocus, Hairspray, Halloween 1, A Nightmare on Elm Street 1, Hot to Trot, Uncle Buck, Critters, Legend, True Romance, The Burbs, Elvira: Mistress of the Dark, Road House, The Boy Who Could Fly, Little Monsters, Willow, Serial Mom, The Abyss, All the Right Moves, Beetlejuice, Back to the Beach, The Dark Crystal, Spaceballs, Fright Night, One Crazy Summer, Adventures in Babysitting
Television
"MY SO-CALLED LIFE," "Dexter," "The Sarah Silverman Program," "Ghost Hunters," "Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations" and VH1 shows about metal, especially "Pantera: Behind the Music" ... it makes me want to weep (and ROCK!).
Books
Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers, Wonder Boys, The Missing Piece By Shel Silverstein, No One Here Gets Out Alive (great Jim Morrison bio), Lonsome Dove, Bird by Bird, anything by Chuck Klosterman, Sarah Vowell, David Sedaris or Bill Bryson, The Thornbirds, High Fidelity, A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius, Christine, What's Not to Love: Adventures of a Mildly Perverted Young Writer, Pat the Bunny
Heroes
Mitch Hedberg (RIP)
"I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin' and hook up with 'em later."
"A severed foot is the perfect stocking stuffer."
"I like rice. Rice is great when you're hungry and you want 2,000 of something."
"I like the American-Canadian border, 'cuz if you're walking on the border with a friend, and you push your friend into Canada, he can't push you back right away, 'cuz first he has to go through customs. "What brings you to Canada?":[Points to the side] "That asshole."
"I went to the doctor; all he did was suck blood from my neck. Do not go see Dr. Acula."
"An escalator can never break. It can only become stairs. You would never seen an "Escalator temporarily out of order" sign, just "Escaloaor temporarily stairs. Sorry for the convenience."
"If carrots got you drunk, rabbits would be fucked up."
"A sleeping bag is a tortilla for a human."
"I went to a restaurant, and I saw a guy wearing a leather jacket, eating a hamburger, drinking a glass of milk. I said, "Dude, you are a cow. The metamorphosis is complete. Don't fall asleep or I will tip you over!"
"Fettuccini Alfredo is macaroni and cheese for adults."
"Sometimes I get really lonely. Especially when I'm throwing a Frisbee."
"I think foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs."
"I don't have a microwave oven, but I do have a clock that occasionally cooks stuff."
"Every McDonald's commercial ends the same way: Prices and participation may vary. I wanna open a McDonald's and not participate in anything. I wanna be a stubborn McDonald's owner. "Cheeseburgers?" "Nope! We got spaghetti, and blankets."
"I got a business card because I wanna win some lunches. That's what my business card says: Mitch Hedberg, Potential Lunch Winner. Gimme a call, maybe we'll have lunch. If I'm lucky!"
"I'd like to see a forklift lift a crate of forks. It would be so literal!"
"A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap."
About me: Hello. My name is Kristy and I'm a suburbanite.
As a writer, that's a hard thing for me to admit.
Writers are supposed to come from broken homes on the wrong side of the tracks. They're supposed to have alcoholic fathers and crackhead mothers and terminal illnesses.
Nothing stunts creativity like a happy childhood. Maybe that's why I work for a community newspaper.
ANYWAY, I'm 29 years old, but I never matured past the age of 15. I still listen to Guns n' Roses, binge drink and wear T-shirts, jeans and Chucks like I did back in high school.
I have a lot of weird collections, including Catholic nun trinkets, Homies, beer caps and zombie memorabilia.
My mind is a vault of useless pop culture trivia, mostly gleaned from my experience as a video store clerk. I can quote "Beetlejuice" in its entirety, but cannot figure out how to leave a 20 percent tip on a $30 bar bill.
I'm married to a guy who accepts (and, I think, is turned-on by) all of my idiosyncrasies.
Zelie's in the top 10 cities to win the X-Men Origins World Premiere and TODAY'S THE LAST DAY TO VOTE! Go to http://x-menorigins.com/premiere. Go there and type in zip code 16063 to help bring Hugh Jackman & company to Main Street! Then forward this to everyone in your address book and tell them to do the same thing!
Don't forget to tell all your friends how frightfully fun it would be to get Hugh Jackman to come to Zelienople for the world premiere of X-Men Origins: Wolverine! Think it can't happen? Just go to the contest site: http://x-menorigins.com/premiere and type in 16063 with some other minor info, and it could, indeed, happen!!
TOMORROW NIGHT!!!! Featuring an all night dj tribute to God Monster Lux Interior! Get there early and grab at good seat for the exxtra-gorey 9 pm showing of the original My Bloody Valentine! As always: Lots of Halloween candy and toys! Cheap booze! Pretty wimmin! Foxy Fellas!
Hey! I just heard from your former 13th floor roomie. I found her on Linkedin. She's an attorney here in Cleveland, married to Pat, with a 5 month old baby.
Hey Graver! I was thinking of going to homecoming this year (I haven't been to it since I graduated!!!)... are you planning on going? It would be awesome to meet up!!!
So the Warhol is doing zombie flicks fridays in august. JC and I are heading down tomorrow for "Return of the Living Dead" and "Dead Alive" It starts at 7 and the cost is $7.50. I had to pass it along, and sorry for the last minute stuff, I just found out myself.
It analyzes and rates all Lifetime movies. I still remember being invited out by some guy freshman year and I was like, "Uhh, no way. We're having a '15 and Pregnant' viewing party. "
You beat me to the comment! When I heard about it, I too was transported back to the land of pie-shaped rooms and Natty Ice. I can't believe I forgot about the drinking game. Good times... :-)
Sorry I didnt get to say goodbye, I was outvoted on staying out because some people I was with were tired. Boys...ugh. Anyways I hope to see you again soon. Keep me updated on Tionesta :)
