Ive been in the entertainment industry since I was a teenager, starting out in newspaper ads and commercials for local department stores. Ive also worked on the production side of the business as a casting director, location scout, and talent agent. I also work in marketing research as a moderator, and have been a public speaker for 15 years. Other special skills include driving, walking in really really high heels, crying, sneezing, and burping on command, getting pregnant, and subsequently messing up the heads of the fetuses that made it out alive. And talking reallyreallyreally fast. AND LOUD!!
Influences
Being adopted, prescription medication, alcohol, paranoia, catty bitches, reality TV and rejection.
Pretty much every big hair glam band from the 80's. Especially, but not limited to Aerosmith, Bon Jovi, Motley Crue, and Poison. I also love Tom Petty, Radiohead, The Verve, The Rolling Stones, The Beatles, Clapton, Bruce Springsteen, The Police, Frank Sinatra, Stevie Ray Vaughn, Johnny Cash, Eva Cassidy, Etta James, Rufus Wainwright, Queen, Pre-Disney Elton John, Madonna, The Clash, The Ramones, Ludacris, Eminem, Stevie Wonder, Sublime, CCR, Nirvana, Led Zeppelin, AC/DC, Mica, Janis Joplin, Broadway & Opera. Not a big fan of country music.
Movies
are better when I watch them alone at home. That way, I can drink, smoke and yell at the screen, and no one tells me to shut the hell up.
Television
I love all trashy reality shows because I love a good train wreck. I hate Fox News and Oprah. Yes. I hate Oprah. She is the devil. Bitch, I can read & dont want your favorite things.
I like "Myth Busters", "Jeopardy", and "Access Entertainment Extra Edition Inside Tonight". I love celebrity gossip. I think Mary Hart looks fab for being 79, but I liked Sugar Ray better when he tried to sing, versus when he tries to talk.
Click here to read my interview with Rooftop Comedy. Comedy's best friend! Thanks, Paolo!
I am a classic Type A personality. Im highly motivated & aggressive when I'm trying to reach my goals. I like dogs. I do not like birds. I am obsessed with shoes, The Weather Channel, Clorox Bleach Gel Pens and Toile fabric. I do not know how to use punctuation marks properly and use too many ellipses....... I hate chick flicks. Im afraid of fish. I like to chew gum. I am extremely superstitious, but I enjoy walking under ladders, breaking mirrors and stepping on cracks in the sidewalk.
I love Ohio State football, basketball (NCAA, not NBA) and baseball. I hate golf, the clothes are hideous. People should not wear plaid shorts. Ever. Im an 8 year breast cancer survivor. I talk about it. I make jokes about it. Deal with it. It's just cancer, and chances are you know someone who has it. Lighten the hell up. I love my crazy life, and wouldnt change a single second of it. I have the best family and friends any one could have.
I was voted "Funniest Person in Cincinnati" in 2006, and spend my time writing jokes on tiny pieces of paper and in comedy clubs telling jokes to drunk men & women...................................................
Click my head to visit my still under construction website. It's still under construction because Im lazy.
ATTENTION EVERY1: NATIONAL MAGAZINE COVER CONTEST!!!
Hello everybody I would like to ask if you could do me a favor and vote for my daughter Christina. She was hand picked by her modeling school to be in this contest. It runs from May 15 - May 21 you can vote only once a day. This is for a model contest so that she can appear on the front of the Almost Famous Magazine. The site to go to vote for her is www.almostfamousmagazine.com. If she gets enough votes she will appear on the front cover and the winner will be announced in July. So please pass this on to everyone that you know that has a e-mail address to vote for her please. For those who have never seen Christina, she is my default picture and there is a whole album of her in my photos. Please support her and thank so much for helping us out. Christina attends John Robert Powers's school for acting and modeling. She has been there for a year and we would really like you support. Any questions please feel free to contact me.
It's getting closer - case reported in Lorain, OH. Good thing the high speed rail system isn't in place yet, otherwise we'd all be coughing and sneezing down here.
you're fucking awesome. we sat on the couch with like only one person between us at go banana's last wednesday and I could feel the awesome flowing, hopefully it won't be the only time I get to see you live!
(editor's note: totally didn't mean that in a creepy way)
Hey Linda- Here's my new painting, "Roger Kaputnik - Man of the World", part of the Mad Generation Show at The Gallery at East Atlanta Tattoo. April 11-25, 2009. Thanks for looking!
