Legendary Rockstars

It's been speculated that Mikki Lixx invented the color purple. He's been called "special" since an early age however, it was when Mikki was 14, and he went to see Van Halen for the first time, that he galvanized his destiny as a guitar god. After the show Mikki was so inspired by his namesake that he crafted a guitar out of a baseball bat, a humidor, a transistor radio and hair from Chuck Norris' beard in the stadium parking lot. He turned it up as loud as it would go and played Eruption at quadruple speed. He soon drew a crowd of 50,000 people. When his guitar caught on fire from playing so fast, he smashed it on the ground. The roar of the crowd could be heard from space. That was the guitar solo heard 'round the world.

The word of Mikki's guitar prowess spread. When David Lee Roth was searching for a guitarist for his first solo project he publicly stated that he wanted "someone good." Mr. Lixx was granted an audition and subsequently Roth changed his statement to "Ok, I don't want someone THAT good. It's supposed to be all about me. Come on people!"

Even though Mikki didn't get to play for Roth, it wasn't long before he was cutting solos for various artist such as Ozzy, Zappa, Sammy and The Village People. He's most know for being reclusive, often being credited under strange pseudonyms such as Nuno Bettencourt, Yngwie Malmsteen, and Mike Lichodziejewski. Mikki confirmed in March of '09 that he would join Legendary Rockstars when he was presented with a large, uncounted pile of cash.

Rica Rockitt was born to rock. She began to skip school at the age of 7 to play guitar under the "el" to support her candy cigarette habit. At 13, her own mother banned her from all family gatherings due to a certain Jägermeister incident. So she pulled herself up by her own bootstraps, and decided to make a break for it - by tying those bootstraps to Mötley Crüe's tour bus. In rubbing shoulders with the glam and glitter, she found herself BFF with Lita Ford, who asked her to join her new band. Rica ended up being kicked out of the Runaways because she was "too good for a girl". She later became the stunt double for Joan Jett in the movie Light Of Day, and would frequently fill in with The Blackhearts when Joan wanted a "sick" day.

She once had a torrid love affair with Motorhead's Lemmy Kilmister, but broke it off because Lemmy didn't party hard enough for her. After a gig, Rica likes to relax in a bathtub filled with Everclear. But don't be fooled - she can be stopped dead in her Rock n Roll tracks by the soft sounds of Peter Cetera and even Yanni. She can burp Disney's "It's A Small World" in perfect pitch.

While working as a makeup artist for The Spice Girl's Reunion Tour, she met Sebastian Starr, who bribed her for Posh's makeup tips. Rica agreed, but only in exchange for a spot in Legendary Rockstars, since was out of a job after the tour.

Sebastian At 5 years old, child TV sensation Sebastian Star was the wealthiest child in the world but by the time he was 12 years old he had wasted his fortune on clothes, CDs, cologne and other things that start with "c". The cruel world of show business was harsh place for an awkward tweener. His charming smile and witty lines no longer impressed the American people and when he could no longer support his alcoholic parents, he was forced into the seedy world of catalog modeling.

Sebastian's big break came in high school when he played Sandy in a performance of "Grease" at a New Jersey community theater. Jon Bon Jovi witnessed his performance and was quoted as saying "...she was great!...Wait, that was a dude?" Sebastian soon found himself fronting the band Steelheart.

Sebastian isn't really aware that he's joined Legendary Rockstars. He believes that he's participating on a reality show so keep it on the d/l.

Ted When it comes to bass lines and pickup lines, no one is smoother than Ted Cougar. Megan Fox says "The only thing in the world that makes me lose all inhibition is the sound of Ted's sexy voice and the feeling of his bottom end." Nobody knows how he does it and nobody really cares but you can always find this legendary rockstar by following the wake of broken hearts that he leaves behind.

"Fast Teddy" began his professional career under the stage name Ted Ansani as the bassist/vocalist for the 1990's pop band Material Issue which was a Chicago based band that rose to stardom releasing 4 major label albums while touring the world and elsewhere.

Upon the untimely death of Material Issue's lead singer, Jim Ellison, Ted moved to L.A. and played with notable names such as Art Garfunkle, John Oates, Andy Gibb and Andrew Ridgeley. His big break came when he co-wrote and produced the Macarena, Hollaback Girl and My Heart Will Go On. Ted joined Legendary Rockstars after meeting Sebastian Star at a waxing party.

Tommy Tommy spent his youth in town called Brighton, South of London England. His mother left his father when he was 6 years old to join the circus. His father, a traveling sales man, taught him all the things a kid needs to know as a child like how to drink, smoke and fight.

He self taught himself how to play drums on a kit he stole out of Keith Moon's mansion. Beating the drums was a constructive replacement for beating people's faces and he soon became very good at balancing a tall glass of whiskey on his snare drum and playing perfect paradiddles without spilling a drop. At age twenty he moved to LA at and landed a steady gig with Spinal Tap but soon quit after nearly spontaneously combusting.

It's rumored he once killed a man with his mind but it cannot be proven. He still holds a Guinness world record for drinking four gallons of vodka in a single swig. Tommy joined Legendary Rockstars as part of his court ordered musical correction program.