YOU'VE WAITED FOR THIS ALBUM TO DROP LONG TIME AND YOU'VE NEVER EVEN HEARD OF THEM. IT'S A QUEERLY WONDERFUL WORLD, YOU JUST DON'T KNOW IT, YOU DRONING WALLOWING FOOLS!
HERE IS THE SAME SONG PLAYED OVER AND OVER AGAIN, MIRRORING THE HELL OF THE OVEREXPOSED WORLD OF UTTER NEON BILGE, AND IT'S ALL GREAT! BUT DAMN IT IF YOU'D KNOW THE DIFFERENCE. YOU'VE A LOVELY PICTURE OF MONA LISA IN YOUR PRETTY LOCKET, AND YOUR RINGTONE CALLS YOU A FUCKPOPE FOR A POUND A POP, FERCHRISTSAKE!
MEN OF UNITUS HAVE JUST COMPLETED THEIR DEBUT LONG PLAYING ORACLE OF A WORLD YOU NEVER THOUGHT YOU'D WANT TO INHABIT. BUT, LOOK!! YOU'RE ALREADY KNEE DEEP IN THE STUFF AND YOUR FAVOURITE WALLOWING PANT SHOPPIE IS NOW A FUCKING TESCO'S LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT PRODUCTION LINE, AND YOU'VE NO IDEA'S LEFT IN THE OLD TEA STRAINER.
"GLAND OF HOPE AND GLORY", THE PSYCHEDELIC K-HOLE, IS AN OVERBLOWN BEAST OF NIGHTMARESTUFF. NEWS IS THAT RECORDING WAS TOUGH. WHEN YOU'VE GOT THE KIDS AND THE FUCKING CULTURE BOBBIES KNOCKING YOUR DOOR DOWN DEMANDING YOU HALT THE CAVING IN OF THEIR FRAGILE EGGSHELL NOGGINS, EVERY SWEET LORD GIVEN SECOND, THAT THEIR SQUALL BECOMES A TINNITUSUAL GLORY THAT ONLY A CHOSEN FEW CAN HANDLE - YOU STRUGGLE.
RADOVAN KARADZIC, SERBIAN SOFTBAG, ALWAYS SAID : " YOU CREATE THE WORLD TO TEAR YOUR HEAD OFF". AND YOU HAVE TO AGREE.
1.
2. THREE GLANDS FULL
3. ONE GLAND
4. HE THUG THE GLAND
5. TWO GLANDS
6. GLAND OF HOPE AND GLORY
7. GLAND OF GOD
8. TALK TO THE GLAND
9. IF YOU'RE HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT, CLAP YOUR GLANDS
10. GLAND ON THE RUN
11. LOOK MA, NO GLANDS
12. KIDDYSPASMS
A REVOLVING SEXUAL METAL PUN THAT WAS NEVER FUNNY, BUT TELLS YOU A HELL OF A LOT MORE THAN ANYONE HAS THE RIGHT TO BE INTERESTED IN.
WHETHER YOU WANT TO FORGET IT ALL OR STARE IT BLANK IN THE FACE AND SHOUT WILDLY INTO THE INFINITE EYE OF JEHOVAH, YOU CAN GO FOR IT!
OUT NOW NO LITE RECORDS AS DIGGIT ALL DOWNLOAD AND CD, YOU HAVE BEEN KINDLY WARNED. YOU DESERVE SOMETHING, RIGHT?
LIVE PERFORMANCES, EVERY WHICH WAY, ARE SUBJECT TO THE HALTING OF MASS AGGRESSIVE FACE RUBBING AND EYE ROLLING PALSY. KEEP EM PEELED, SMART GUY.
FOR GIG BOOKINGS MESSAGE US ON MYSPACE OR EMAIL US AT MENOFUNITUS@HOTMAIL.CO.UK
I know Tuesdays is your book club or whatever - but you guys should stop being so square and come to the pub and see some rad heavy rock bands or something....
NOISESTAR PRESENTS
Tuesday 11th August @ The Old Blue Last, Shoreditch
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