tu bao bao
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kor elefanten!!!
Male
28 years old
Beijing
China
Last Login: 11/8/2009
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Mood:
distractable
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tu bao bao's Interests
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| General | do you care? playing air guitar on a real guitar, singing in welsh and/or chinese or no identifiable tongue at all, making a scene at concerts, climbing great walls, shooting ak47's and druganov 75 sniper rifles, losing at chinese chess to old men in alleyways, drinking to please the winner, wing chun or whatever you like to call it, watching the sun rise through myriad colours in the BJ pollution, scootaying at 4am, dodging traffic, dodging police, dodging pedestrians, paying for repairs to said scootay, (gotta admire that sino craftsmanship) going on holiday and pretending i'm not laowai, eating unconfirmed (food) products, rum, faith, mahjiang, bourjoisjiang, riding donkeys on mountains, riding little stout horses on the plains, riding camels in deserts, riding my luck in general, carrying a camera that i never use, chinglish, englese, avoiding eye contact with stalkers, stupid haircuts, cats, birds, not using any grammar when off duty, pretending kuai=dollars, not replying | | Music | music? i hate music. it's the root of our problems as a "society".
actually, that's not totally true. i love the songs "hotel california", "my heart will go on", "if i could", and anything by richard clayderman. and yanni. oh oh oh... kenny g.
ah, china. | | Movies | anything that costs less than 50 pence. i'm very discerning.
FREE JIMMY | | Television | takeshi's castle. surely the only thing on television with soul.
any shitty series that someone else buys in a knock off dvd shop and has finished with. and by any i mean some. and even they depend on how wasted i am.
the problem is i never know which channel i'm watching, being that there are apparently over 50 at least. so as i flick through, here are some of the choice picks i sometimes stumble across...
there's a strange show where loads of kids from different schools all make these chain reaction devices - for no apparent reason. perhaps honour. glory even. they take it very seriously, and a little flag is invariably hoisted as a result of their efforts. actually, i usually see this program as i'm getting ready to go out. i believe americans call it "pre-gaming". i call it getting pissed and listening to music and watching telly.
another favourite is the kids' class 3 legged race program. 30 kids with their legs strapped to one another running as fast as they can over 50 meters. in fact, most are so rigorously trained that they do it without falling in about 9 seconds, and it's quite impressive. sometimes they FALL..... actually hilarious.
some other choice programming:
chinese infomercials where women cry about their boobs, chinese infomercials for power rangers masks that make thirteen year old boys grow an inch over 3 months, enabling new super duper slam dunk skillz, chinese infomercials for electrical pants (that's underwear for those confused) that make a man a real man, and hence satisfy their significant other in ways unimaginable until they owned the pants.
chinese infomercials for work out equipment that apparently was only designed to melt butter, chinese infomercials about magic tea that removes fat from your stomach and thighs and relocates it all to your chest. All of the above are certified by a guy in a white coat. who looks like my dad. | | Books | i can't read.
ok, i can.
a little.
does it have pictures?
karl pilkington is one of the greatest visionaries of the last 10 minutes.
noam chomsky spells it out. nothing we didn't know already, but he doesn't bamboozle you with, how to say, bullshit.
adrian mole. now there's a man of our times.
the primal scream is also berry iiinteresssting.
the beano. before dennis went soft. that's a book, right?
and my favourite childhood book, how to hold a crocodile. by the face, by the way. | | Heroes | me mam and dad. how they've kept it together through all the crazery is really quite remarkable.
did you hear that ma? REMARKABLE ;) |
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tu bao bao's Details
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| Status: | Single | | Orientation: | Straight | | Hometown: | unicorn | | Body type: | 6' 1" / Average | | Ethnicity: | White / Caucasian | | Religion: | Other | | Zodiac Sign: | Gemini | | Children: | Someday | | Occupation: | Laoshi | | Income: | $75,000 to $100,000 |
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tu bao bao nothin much happnin' round these parts these days i see... Posted at 8:55 AM Jun 8
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tu bao bao's Blurbs |
About me:
I'm a miserable shite currently living in Beijing. Made my way here via Deutschland, yin ge lan, norn iron and a short stint in espana. I teach feng le zhong guo renmin English, through the media of dance, music and incoherant mumbling. i haven't done any exercise in a year, and subsequently have become a fat skinny bastard, much like that bloke in that film. inherently lazy scruff dangling free in a sea of madness, i think i might be getting the hang of it, at long sodding last. it might actually come together after all.
Strike that last statement. i still have no clue what the devil is going on. actually i know exactly, but it's all in the mind.
by the way, the pics here haven't been tampered with, it's just a funny kind of film i was using. so there.
Myspace Layouts at Pimp-My-Profile.com / Squirell - Image Hosting
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Who I'd like to meet:
myself, halfway. briefly. perhaps in the desert.
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