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***** The Scotsman

An infamous trouble-maker and agent provocateur, Bitz's none-too-shabby academic career took a turn for the fabulous when she ran screaming for civilisation and landed on her dinky feet in London town. Accounts of being chased out of the village with burning pitchforks remain officially undocumented but entirely plausible.

" A stunning zaftig cherub" The Independent

Forging an accidental career as a comic burlesque dancer (most noted for her anatomical bar-tending and animal puppet porn shows) and singer whilst studying Theatre Arts and Drama at Goldsmiths College, Ophelia Bitz has worked with some of the entertainment industry's biggest names. From televised hypnotism with Derren Brown (2006) and head-lining Tim Burton's Halloween party (2006) to touring with The Tigerlillies (2008) and opening The Dresden Dolls' UK tour (2006) and music videos with The Puppini Sisters (2008), Bitz has seen it all and drunk them all under the table!

"Witty, dirty, fabulous. Ophelia Bitz is F***ing hilarious" Martyn Jacques, the Tigerlillies

"Brilliantly twisted" The Guardian

Less credibly, she was also Mika's dancing voluptuary (2007) until she was sacked for voicing her opinions on pop muzak and making off with the tour bus rider. The whole shameful episode has scarred Bitz for life but added fuel to her lust for massive audiences and media adulation.

"A backing dancer" Rolling Stone!

Other career scars come from Ophelia's love of side-show performance and she merrily walks, jumps and dances on broken glass and gobbles fire as hungrily as she does innocent victims and cocktails! If you're good she'll show you the 6-stitch beauty on her right foot, sustained in a pink prison in the Austrian countryside....Don't try this at home kids!

"Ophelia Bitz is a dirty, hilarious, perfectly-timed emcee" Molly Crabapple, Dr Sketchy's NYC

After several very successful years on the international circuit as a physical comedienne Bitz has done the unspeakable and resumed speaking on stage! An experienced and gifted compere and comedienne Bitz performs predominantly as a ring-mistress and mistress of ceremonies, bringing her strong vocals, outrageous humour and inimitable glamour to a stage near you! Lock up your daughters and all other valuables, this slap-stick pin-up relishes her reputation as a party mammal and dangerous dingbat.

" Inimitable potty-mouthed pin-up" Venue Magazine

Receiving 5-star reviews and sell-out shows for her 2007 Edinburgh Fringe run of international cabaret art salon Dr Sketchy's has only encouraged her in her quest for global domination through comedy, song, side-show, events production and unladylike deportment and will almost certainly end in an untimely (but fabulously dressed) demise. In leau of flowers please send rubber chickens and brandy coffee. Bitz will be remembered for her complete lack of shame, her erotic fiction, shoe collection and anatomical bartending

"The doyenne of the anti-burlesque" Dusty Limits

Here is a video directed by Alex De Campi what Ophelia wrote and performed and is filthily proud of. Appologies for the dodgy sound quality! Dancing in her scanties on Channel 4 with Derren Brown The Lowest Common Denominators! Ophelia Bitz and Tom Baker present a romantic sideshow cabaret for the twisted and jaded.... And here is some flashy circus-art stuff courtesy of Jodie Harsh and Malcolm Pate