Bernie’s politically incorrect and very proud of it. He say’s people suck; you hunt us, pluck us, cook us, and eat us. I hope you puke us! Bird Flu to all, but the birds! Bernie’s been ganged gonged on the Gong Show, by Salt n Pepa, Jay Thomas, Argus Hamilton, Ann Pascal, and even Scot Nemis and he don’t care, even Ms. Costello, of Open Call Show on the TV Guide channel, had to bleep him. He’s been censored for 26 years and on the Tonight Show, he told Alonzo Bodden, that he can’t wait to take on Triumph the insult dog. Bernie says, "I’ll fix his nut-licking ass, that ball-breathed bastard! He’s the coyote and I’m the road runner!" Alonzo told Bernie he had to tone it down being on national TV and Bernie said, "I’ll swoop and poop on you!" Needless to say, Bernie got edited again! On America’s Got Talent, Bernie said, "America, you got the bird!" Piers said, "that’s the most rediculous ventriloquist act I ever saw!" To bad he didn’t know it was a parroty!
Website
oscarandbernie.com
Influences
George Carlin encouraged me early in my career, back in 1974 here in Vegas, and 1980 we did the Forrest Duke show together. Buddy Hackett was a pleasure to meet and his son Sandy was also very helpful. It was a great opportunity meeting George Burns at Ceaser's Palace and talking with him in his dressing room before his show. Comic's like Larry Scarano, Russ Nagel, Disgruntled Clown, James Lee Reeves, Brian Hoffman, Mike Malik, and comedy writer Paul R. Brown are people I have had the pleasure to work with. Read my book, "Somtimes...You Gotta' Kickka' Cab! I detail my experiences there at My Site
Members
Bernie's a big member, he's hung like a bull gerbil!
TV Shows
America’s Got Talent, Tonight Show, Gong Shows, Open Call Show, Forrest Duke Show, David Lynch Show, TV commercials for Chop of Towbin Dodge, Doosan of S. Korea plus a bunch of local stuff and ads seen on ESPN. Here's Bernie on Lets Make a Deal http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6J2na3ogaHI
Films
One, Rock Robbers, The Pact, Jack of Hearts, Oceans 13, Race to Witch Mountain, Hangover, and What Happens in Vegas.
Albums
Bernie’s new hit single "I’m a Freak of Nature and I Need my Nature Freak"........
Oscar and Bernie's Interests
General
I find it interesting meeting people on the internet, it reminds me of my youth when I would hitch-hike. Bernie's looking for his little chick-a-dee.
Music
Bernie's favorites are anything by the Byrds, I like Glass Harp, saw the Doors in 69, Cleveland, Almond Brothers 73, Columbus, US Festival in 82 at San Bernardino, Ca. Best sound was Pink Floyd at Blossom Music Center, Richfield Ohio, outside venue. Saw Guess Who open for the Association in Cleveland. Saw B.B. King back stage at Hilton, 74, in Vegas and backstage with Scorpions, Vegas 90? Chester West Virginia, 72, Black Oak, J. Giles, Humble Pie and saw Edgar Winter in St. Louis airport. The Shadows of Knight,Chi. town, did tune Gloria, saw his Vette catch on fire, pretty rad. Saw Jethro Tull do over 3 hours in Cleveland, Passion Play, and next day went to Pittsburgh and they only did 1 hr. and left, Pitt. people wouldn't quiet down for flute solo, at the end of the show,the phone would ring, I'm yelling in the back of the arena,"Don't answer the Phone!" Ian didn't answer and played a few more minutes and had to boogie.
Movies
Bernie, again loves "The Birds" and "Crow", I liked "Total Recall," "2001" "Taming of Shrew", "Bullet", 'Breckfast at Tiffany's" "Christmas Story" and "Major League" Oscar had speaking parts in "One," and "Rock Robbers," shot in Cleveland. Worked as an extra in "Oceans 13", "What Happens in Vegas", and "Race to Witch Mountain" all in Vegas.
Television
" George and Gracie", "Sgt. Bilko", "Lucy", "24", "Johnny Carson", "Dean Martin Roast", "Rockford Files" , "Honeymooners", and anything Football. You may have seen us on the Gong Show, 1989-90 , America's Got Talent, 2007, Open Call, 2005, and a short blip on the Tonight Show, 2006. We also did the Akron Today Show, 2008, in Ohio. !980 we were on the Forrest Duke show with George Carlin in Las Vegas. Stay Tuned!
Books
Please buy, "Sometimes...You Gotta' Kicka' Cab!" I wrote it and got to sell a lot of them to pay off my ex-wife, at Oscar's eBook Who can set up my exwife on a date with O.J.? You get a free book. Thanks! You want to read another good book, Try "As a Man Thinketh" by, James Allen
Heroes
George Burns, George Carlin, George Lucas, all the George's, to be George in Vegas is a good thing.
Oscar and Bernie's Details
Status:
In a Relationship
Here for:
Networking
Orientation:
Straight
Hometown:
Las Vegas
Body type:
6' 0" / Average
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
Zodiac Sign:
Sagittarius
Smoke / Drink:
No / Yes
Children:
Proud parent
Education:
Some college
Occupation:
Comedian
Oscar and Bernie's Schools
Brecksville-Broadview Heights
Broadview Heights,Ohio
Graduated: 1972
Student status: Alumni
Degree: High School Diploma
Clubs: Played football because it was legal to hit people, played the drums for the same reason.
About me: I like to go to the mountains, and then go to the sea, and when I'm done, I got to pee! Bernie doesn't care, he'll swoop and poop anywhere.
See Oscar with Cameron Diaz in "What Happens in Vegas"
See all the Stars Get D. Bird! at YouTube.
Who I'd like to meet: Bernie's going to debate Triumph the Insult Dog. Please see Oscar and Bernie at our web site. Bernie also said, "Bite me Elmo!" and, "Kermit your next!"
I want to thank you for allowing me as Red Skelton to be a part of your myspace life.
Fall is here and the holidays are approaching. They can be stressful so I'm giving you a gift of laughter.
If by chance you are in Las Vegas or plan on visiting us this season, I would be honored to meet you.
I perform every Sunday, Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday night 9pm inside the Royal Resort Hotel showroom located 99 Convention Center Drive (basically corner of Las Vegas Blvd and Convention Center Drive)
The name of the show is Larry G Jones ~Man of 1002 Voices Show.
I'm the opening act as Red Skelton. If you get the chance please stop by and say HI. If you want to see the show here is a discount code for you.
Reminder about the upcoming Canton, Ohio 2 day concert, CreekFest Ohio 09 August 28 & 29, 2009 Featuring Mushroomhead, (hed) p.e., Saliva, Smile Empty Soul, Beyond The Rage and more. Over half the floor seats have been reserved, so we thank everyone who has reserved a seat. If you haven’t yet, and wish to sit up close on the floor, please send us a message (not a comment however comments are always welcome) with tickets on the subject line letting us how many you want to reserve, and within the next few days we will message everyone who requested them with where they can be paid for and picked up. This concert will be a historic event for Canton, and we hope everyone can be a part of it! Tickets (both floor and general admission) are limited! Remember this concert will have onsite camping, haunted houses, food, vendors, other live entertainment and more! The First Annual CreekFest Ohio 09, Canton Ohio!
Just stopping by to say HI!
Sure is getting HOT in Las Vegas.
When you get a chance, check out the “COOLEST SHOW IN TOWN”
Starring Larry G Jones~Singing Impressionist and Brian Hoffman as 'Red Skelton'
We have a blast every Sunday, Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday.
Larry G Jones was just named 'Entertainer of the Year' in Las Vegas.
We have a 'COOL DEAL' for you.
Get General Admission and VIP preferred seating tickets at half price by using discount code MYSPACE (all Caps)
Visit http://www.LasVegasActs.com/showvideos.html to see VIDEOS!
Click on TICKETS to reserve seats for the show;)
Next time you are in the neighborhood, check out the funniest show in Las Vegas!
I wish you continued success in all you do.
"Goodnight now and may God bless"
Brian Hoffman~Red Skelton Impersonator
If you are interested in Tickets for our upcoming 2 day concert in Canton Ohio, featuring Mushroomhead, Saliva, (hed) pe, Smile Empty Soul, Beyond The Rage and more, send us a message and lets us know, we are taking orders NOW for the floor seating, which is the up close seating and its limited and reservations are going fast! On site camping also available. After hour party, Haunted Houses, and more! Also if you are interested in camping on site, reserve your spot NOW and get it half off! $50.00 for the weekend instead of $100.00 for your camp site! (you do NOT need to camp to see the show!)
Hi Gang, come see us at Toadz in Cedar City, Utah June 16 at 8pm and at the Greek Isle June 27 at 8pm in the Short Bus Comedy Show, $10.Las Vegas. Thanks, Oscar and Bernie
Vegas! The Jump Off Magazine is looking for the hottest Comedians and Poets in the 702. If you think you've got want it takes to wear the crown email lokei@thejumpoffmag.com or call (702)722-9343
GRAND PRIZE
$$$CASH MONEY$$$ YOUR OWN SHOW ON THE STRIP!!! (YOU WILL BE THE HEADLINER) CUSTOM BUILT WEBSITE (INCLUDES 2 YEAR WEB HOSTING) PHOTO SHOOT JULY COVER OF THE JUMP OFF MAGAZINE (1500 COPIES PRINTED EACH MONTH)
Hi Gang, May 15 at the Onyx Theater in commercial center, 11pm Short Bus Comedy Show. Only $10. per ticket. 953 E. Sahara Ave. behind the Rack store come on down!
Just a reminder about Xanadu, an awesome convention in LasVegas from April 17-19 at the Plaza hotel. www.xanadulasvegas.com Check it out!!! Sci-fi, gaming, horror, anime, an Independent film fest, some amazing special guests!!! You don't want to miss this!!
If you are ever in the neighbothood, like this lady was, check out the funniest show in town!
I wish you continued success in all you do.
“Goodnight now and may God bless”
