PaganBitch!
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Life's a Bitch... Give 'er yer Best Shot, then Run Like Hell
Female
102 years old
Arkham, Massachusetts
United States
Last Login: 11/12/2009
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PaganBitch!'s Interests
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| General | Warning: I’m going to make a lot of sweeping generalizations in these pages. Why? Because it’s My temple and I can do what I want. And because, in many cases, sweeping generalizations are pretty accurate, even though I know that, for instance, “all Pagans are different.” (Funny how a bunch of people all being different the same way become conformists...) Also because generalizations are easier and less verbose than qualifying every statement. So here’s the disclaimer:
I know there are exceptions to everything I’m about to say, and if you happen to BE one, then don’t sweat it. What I’m saying obviously doesn’t apply to YOU.
If you want to write and tell us just how exceptional you are, feel free. But if you truly are an exception, you of all people have noted many, many examples of the kind of crap we're ranting about.
There’s an old saying (which nobody understands any more):
The Exception Proves the Rule.
By pointing out an exception, you’ve only served to confirm that there IS a general pattern to which there IS an exception, thereby proving our point. Hah!
And if you’re writing just to make a big deal about one little detail and ignoring the thrust of the Bitch’s bitch, this only reinforces the underlying truth of the main theme. Again, Hah!
If you want to write to tell the Magnificent Matriarch how fucked she is, call her names, insult her, rant, rave, flame and fume—that’s fine too.
We'll even publish your message, with comments, if it’s stupid enough, funny enough, or (I guess it could happen) intelligent enough. But remember: This Is PaganBitch, and if you’re an idiot, we’ll let you and everybody else know it. To make matters worse, we’ll crack all over your bad grammar, spelling, punctuation, and anything else you might say that ear-marks you as pig-ignorant. We can’t help you with that last bit (except to suggest you maybe read a book or do some research or find a teacher before you go off half-cocked), but here are some tips on how to save a bit of face concerning the rest:
Their = posessive case of "they"
There = specifies place
They’re = contraction for “they are”
Two = more than 1, less than 3
Too = “also” & “more than necessary”
To = should cover everything else
Its = possessive case of “it”
It’s = contraction for “it is”
Where = refers to a place
Were = plural past-tense of “is”
We’re = contraction for “we are”
Tenant = occupant or rentor
Tenet = principle or rule
Whose = possessive case of “who”
Who’s = contraction for “who is”
Who = refers to a person
That = refers to an object
Your = possessive case of “you”
You’re = contraction for “you are”
Yore = the past
And don’t forget, kiddies:
“I” Before “E” Except After “C” (except in neighbor, weigh, deity, their, weird, and a few others—look it up if you’re in doubt)
30 days hath september, april, june, and no wonder...
don’t count your boobies before they’ve hatched...
a stitch in time keeps the doctor away...
don’t take any wooden pentagrams...
“You mean you’re going to get all hung up on that nit-picky spelling and punctuation crap and ignore the vastness and profundity of my home-spun, folksy, down-to-earth pagan wisdom?”
Yes indeedee! After all, why should we take anything you have to say seriously if you’re too stupid, scatter-brained, shallow, or indifferent to learn your native language? If you can’t get the simple surface stuff right, how can you expect anyone to believe you’re capable of deeper, more complex thought?
(If English isn’t your native language, let us know; perhaps we'll cut you some slack. Probably not. That is to say, Do You Live Here? Then Learn the Goddam Language!)
| | Music | Definitely | | Movies | El Topo; Saragosa Manuscript; Allegro Non Tropo; Walking Tall | | Television | House, of course | | Books | You know, those magic texts you should have read, and want people to think you've read...but haven't! | | Heroes | Dea Ana, Hunter in the Void; Lucifer, Bringer of Light |
| Groups:
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Pagan Rant, {+}Occult Studies{+}, Thorgil's Brotherhood of the Bloodaxe, Voices for Vendetta, Federation of the Frosthammer, Wicked Archery Range
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PaganBitch!'s Details
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| Status: | Divorced | | Here for: | Networking | | Hometown: | Arkham MA | | Zodiac Sign: | Scorpio | | Occupation: | Sacred Clown |
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PaganBitch! is in your extended network
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PaganBitch!'s Latest Blog Entry
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My Idyllic Weekend in the Birkenstocks
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Mommy, Mommy, What’s a Pagan?
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McWicca Pt II -- Rede It an’...I don’t know...sleep? sheep?
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Ri-i-i-i-i-i-i-ght...
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Dream of the Demon Bishop
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PaganBitch!'s Blurbs |
About me:
TO ALL PROSPECTIVE NEW FRIENDS:
PaganBitch! will no longer honor any add request from a private profile not accompanied by a personal message containing a brief explanation of who you are and why you seek a place among the notables and luminaries on our list. Sorry, that's the way it's gotta be.
WE'RE PAGANS, and we’re free, right? We resist, resent, and rebel against any attempt to tell us how to think and act. We mistrust authority. We refuse to be defined. We have no use for thou-shalts and thou-shalt-nots. We think for ourselves. Right? Not only that, we are tolerant of each other’s differences, and we are inclusive, autonomous, and non-judgmental, and our religion has no dogma. We constantly seek to improve ourselves, our craft, and our lives, for we are only interested in truth. Right?
So what if there were people trying to tell you what to believe, how to behave, what you could and could not call yourselves, and what kind of magic you could and could not perform? How would you feel if they were rewriting history, redefining words, and passing magical misinformation in order to seize and keep control, indulge their own prejudices, or enjoy the perqs and privileges of being the official Leaders of a government-approved, -controlled, and –sponsored Church, at the expense of your precious autonomy?
We pagans have been fighting the forces of oppression, hypocrisy, and prejudice in the form of xenophobia, gender bias, social morés, and religious orthodoxy for thousands of years. We won’t put up with these shenanigans, not from the Catholics, Fundamentalists, Government, or any other gang of do-gooders bent on limiting our freedom. Right?
So why are we putting up with it from within our ranks? Why!?
Because we’re sheep. We don’t really think for ourselves, that’s too hard, and someone might get offended if we disagree. We would much rather have somebody tell us what’s what. As long as it’s somebody who dresses like we do and is close to our own age group. As long as they don’t come right out and call themselves our "leaders." As long as they tell us what we want to hear and make us feel special. As long as they don’t actually expect us to live up to our ideals, and we don’t have to insist that they live up to theirs either...
Because we’re lazy. Too lazy to find out for ourselves what real Magic is. Too lazy to ferret out the real, hidden History of our world. We fill our heads with superstitious nonsense because learning the terminology and techniques of real Magic is just too complicated. Just give us the recipe, tell us what to do, keep it simple, and we’ll be on our way in a jiffy, casting circles, drawing air-symbols that we don’t understand, and calling ourselves Priestesses, without having to be bothered by what it all means and where it really comes from. Just keep it down to common three-syllable words (max) so we don’t have to look anything up in the dictionary or read anything written before we were born. Or (shudder) have to admit that there’s something we don’t know that’s actually worth knowing...
Because we’re starving for recognition and respect, but we don’t want to have to do much to earn it. We’d have to admit that we’re not “already there.” It’s much better to be looked up to as a teacher by a bunch of kids who don’t know any better than to admit our mind-numbing ignorance and just be students. Real students. Doing real work. It’s just too hard, and it takes too long. But if all we have to do is repeat what we’re told by our favorite NP celebrities, we can start out being superior to somebody else almost immediately (especially those mindless christians!), and all we have to do is put in our coven-time. That’s why we pretend to knowledge we don’t have, and let our “leaders” and “spokespersons” tell us how free we are, how wise, how noble, how autonomous, how different from the rest of the world. (And we’re soooooo humble about it, too...)
Because we’re afraid. Oh, it’s easy to stand up to your enemies, as long as you make a united front—there’s safety in numbers, after all, and they stopped killing us for it a long time ago. But it takes real courage to stand up to your fellow pagans and self-appointed “leaders.” Just because we say we have no dogma doesn’t make it so—we have plenty of unwritten laws—but we’re too scared to point them out to “our own” ("hey, that's dogma!") and we're even more scared to point out when they're being violated ("hey, you're being a hypocrite!"). That wouldn’t be nice. It wouldn’t be friendly. It might be considered “authoritarian” or “arrogant” or “manipulative.” And besides, they might just turn around and tell everybody that you’re not a "real witch." In our town, we’ve seen an HPS (who prides herself on her successful interface with the local police and purports to speak for all Wiccans) exclude solitaries from the Wiccan fold! Just what the officials wanted to hear, and they manipulated her into it masterfully. Now they don't have to minister to the solitary Wiccans in prison!
As we speak, the Current Resident of the White House is soliciting definitions of NeoPaganism from various self-styled “leaders of the movement,” chosen by gods-know-what criteria, in order to formalize a codified dogma by which all those claiming to be pagan will have to abide in order to be considered official. Everyone else will be left out in the cold. This especially impacts anyone who calls hi/rself clergy. And you are swallowing it all—wine, wafer, and chalice. In fact, you encourage it by insisting that you are part of a government-sanctioned Church, by insisting that your handfastings be legally binding (what happened to separation of church and state?) and in countless other little, but ultimately significant, ways. The self-proclaimed leaders of the NeoPagan movement are only too happy to avail themselves of the temporal power and prestige that will inevitably come from being the sole High Priests, or Governing Council, or Elders, or whatever, of the “Church of Wicca” or any other bunch panting after faith-based goodies from the gov. Once they’ve convinced you of their authority to tell you what’s what, they can then be the sole judges of who is IN and who is OUT. There goes your cherished autonomy, and you with it, right back into the broom closet.
Oh, hell, maybe it's for the best...
I edited my profile with Thomas' Myspace Editor V4.4
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Who I'd like to meet:
Any of the possibly two NPs who aren't offended by this site. But whether you're offended or not, we want to hear from you. If you're particularly hip or especially idiotic--UNLESS YOU SPECIFICALLY REQUEST PRIVATE CORRESPONDENCE--we might even blog all over your message. Especially if you're an idiot, because around here we like to point-and-laugh. It's our favorite thing.
Consider yourself forewarned--we will not ask permission.
Word...
Inclusion on this list will not be taken as a blanket acceptance of everything said here, only that you are willing to confront it, and discuss it with the gloves off. The Beauteous Bitch thanks you in advance for your enthusiastic participation.
Oh, yes: this "top friends" thing doesn't mean anything here. We'll just rotate you periodically to show you all off.
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