candy apples. lullabies.
maple trees & sweet good byes.
purple flowers. garden gnomes.
playground sets,
but empty homes.
driver's license. shopping mall.
concert ticket. alcohol. sobriety laughs in
the face of our past;
shattered innocence-
'youth' expired fast.
--Josh Ludlow--
------------------------------
little boxes on the hillside,
little boxes
made of ticky-tacky.
little boxes on the hillside,
little boxes, all the same.
there's a green one,
& a pink one,
& a blue one,
& a yellow one.
& they're all made
out of ticky-tacky,
& they all look
just the same.
& the people in the houses
all went to the university,
& they all got put in boxes,
& they came out all the same.
& there's doctors,
& lawyers,
& business executives,
& they're all made
out of ticky-tacky,
& they all look just the same.
& they all play on the golf course
& drink their martini dry,
& they all have pretty children
& the children go to school.
& the children
go to summer camp,
& then to the university
& they all get put in boxes,
& they come out all the same.
& the boys go into business,
& marry,
& raise a family
in boxes made of ticky-tacky,
little boxes, all the same.
there's a green one,
& a pink one,
& a blue one,
& a yellow one.
& they're all
made out of ticky-tacky.
& they all
look just the same.
it weaves throughout us
& breathes life into us.
from the music written & sung or spoken, or played
by whatever various artist;
to the wind chimes on my street.
to the crickets,
or sounds of cars passing.
it gives me beat.
it keeps me going.
is my passion.
Top 5 Favorite Albums:
The Lonesome Crowded West -- Modest Mouse
11:11 -- Regina Spektor
Picaresque -- The Decemberists
Post -- Björk
Fever to Tell -- The Yeah Yeah Yeahs
you want on my good side?
approach me with good conversation
about m u s i c .
by the way...
don't judge music by
how well-known it is.
not everything
mainstream is good;
not everything
abstract is good.
i'm positive we have
very different music collections.
& i respect that.
------------------------------
[Some of my iPod selection] a few good artists including, but not limited to:
[*seen live]
a silver mt. zion.
acceptance.
action action.
aerosmith.
alanis morisette. ali harter.
alicia keys.
american football.
amy winehouse.
ani difranco.
animal collective. aqualung.
ariel pink's haunted graffiti.
arcade fire.
the arctic monkeys.
at the drive-in.
the avett brothers. the b-52's. badly drawn boy.
barenaked ladies.
the beach boys.
bear vs. shark.
*bear weather.
the beatles. beck. beirut.
ben folds. ben folds five.
the birthday massacre. björk.
black eyed peas.
black moth super rainbow.
the blood brothers.
boys night out.
brand new. bright eyes.
broken social scene.
busdriver.
calibretto 13.
cap'n jazz.
*cartel.
*cobra starship.
*coheed&cambria.
coldplay.
copeland. the cranberries.
the cure.
daft punk.
*damien rice.
dashboard.
*dave matthews. the decemberists.
the dixie chicks.
dog's eye view.
donovan.
dragonforce.
*the dresden dolls.
eiffel 65.
eisley.
elliott smith.
emery.
Émilie simon.
emilyn brodsky.
*evanescence.
*explosions in the sky.
*fiona apple.
*foxy shazam. franz ferdinand.
the fray.
freezepop. frou frou.
garbage.
a girl called eddy.
glassjaw.
gnarls barkley. godspeed you black emperor!
gogol bordello.
gorillaz.
gravy train.
*gwen stefani.
head automatica.
*hellogoodbye.
hot hot heat.
*husband&wife.
*the hush sound.
hymie's basement. imogen heap.
incubus.
interpol.
iron & wine.
iver.
jack johnson.
james blunt.
jamiroquai. jem.
jet.
jewel.
jill tracy.
jimmy eat world.
john legend.
john mayer.
the juliana theory. justin timberlake.
kanye.
the killers.
kimya dawson.
ludacris.
m.i.a.
m83.
macy gray.
the mad caddies.
mae.
the mamas & the papas.
*man man.
marcy playground.
maria taylor.
maroon 5. the mars volta.
massive attack.
matt costa.
*mewithoutyou.
mika.
minus the bear.
miss kitten.
missy elliot.
*modest mouse.
mogwai.
the moldy peaches.
múm.
*murder by death.
my morning jacket.
nancy sinatra.
natalie portman's shaved head.
neutral milk hotel. no doubt.
norah jones.
not by choice.
obadiah parker.
of montreal.
the offspring.
ok go.
outkast.
*panic! at the disco.
paula abdul. peaches.
peter bjorn & john.
phil collins.
pink floyd.
the pixies.
placebo.
plain white t's. proud simon.
psapp.
queen.
r kelly. radiohead.
rasputina.
*the red racer.
reel big fish.
*regina spektor.
r.e.m.
richard cheese.
*the rocket summer.
sarah mclachlan.
scissor sisters.
serj tankian.
she wants revenge.
the shins.
*shiny toy guns. sigur rós.
simon&garfunkel.
smash mouth.
the smiths. sonanaut. the sound of animals fighting.
*the sounds.
the spill canvas.
spoon.
stars.
straylight run.
streetlight manifesto. the strokes.
styx. sufjan stevens.
system of a down.
taking back sunday.
tally hall.
tapes 'n tapes.
tenacious d.
they might be giants. thom yorke.
tom waits.
tomanandy.
tracy chapman.
tv on the radio. the velvet underground.
waking ashland.
the wallflowers.
ween.
weezer.
the white stripes.
why?
wilco.
yeah yeah yeahs.
-------------------------
**thank you to anyone who
has influenced my music taste.
Movies
imaginary heroes.
the squid & the whale.
closer.
the family stone.
american beauty.
donnie darko.
blow.
alice in wonderland.
fox & the hound.
the rules of attraction.
crash.
babel.
moulin rouge.
audition.
pulp fiction.
kill bill vol. 1&2
sin city.
garden state.
the wall.
eastern promises.
waking life.
you, me, & everyone we know.
the breakfast club.
requiem for a dream.
almost famous.
Television
...is dead.
Books
the perks of
being a wallflower.
naked lunch.
the rules of attraction.
the fuck-up.
crank.
mere christianity.
1984.
the green mile.
where the sidewalk ends.
a light in the attic.
falling up.
i'm josh. i'm really hard on myself.
i can fly. i can fight. & i can crow.
born on april 1, 1988, making me an aries.
which means i was born naturally stubborn.
trying hard since '88 to re-define your standards. year of the dragon for a reason.
i'm in a band. i bite my nails. & i drink too much coffee.
i love music. i love driving. i love hoodies.
but probably most of all, i love words.
i'm a modern-day bohemian.
which has become known as a 'bum'.
i love the free will of no responsibilities,
but i hate how worthless i feel because of it.
& i only feel so because society makes me feel so.
i would love not feeling dependent on anything
but its been made impossible by society.
i'm skeptical of history.
i'm skeptical of progression.
i'm skeptical of science.
i'm skeptical of medication.
i'm skeptical of government.
i'm skeptical of people.
i'm skeptical of everything but sensory information.
a hundred years ago, i could've gotten away with my lifestyle.
----------------------------- i believe in freedom.
i believe in beauty.
i believe in truth.
& i believe in love.
-----------------------------
Dali cujete sve djecje molitive? Croatian Translation: "Can you hear all of the childrens' prayers?"
i weigh out all of my options.
& wonder what options will open based on the outcome.
i take other peoples' perspectives into consideration.
i tell it like it is.
if you're sensitive, we won't get along.
unless you're my friend;
i'll avoid confrontation at any cost.
which is sometimes hazardous to my relationships.
sometimes i pick my nose; there you have it.
Words [in MY words]: beauty: anything that causes emotion, whether it be in a positive or negative fashion. anything that you can look at & can relate to. (inspires art, causes arousal [in a non-sexual way], provokes thought, recalls memories).
respect: a bond you share with anyone or anything that you can relate to (a particular time in your life, something that you learned from that person, etc.) or perhaps the realization that we are only out to fulfill our own destiny, & to hell with everyone else; the acceptance that sometimes we just have to kiss ass. simple.
love: the unexplainable condition we develop throughout the process of getting to know another human for what they are actually worth; realizing their potential as well as their flaws, & accepting them for who they are.
money: a man-made thing to give worth to that which didn't have worth before, simply so that he could benefit from it. & look where it has gotten us? absolutely everything is run by money, like gasoline to a car. & there's not escaping it; its only going to get worse.
food: a token of selfishness. we need food to survive, yet no matter what it is we are eating, something had to die so that we could live. plant or animal. 'food' simply determines who's boss.
comfort: the conscious or subconscious act of making priority out of whatever brings you immediate gratification at the expense of whoever and/or whatever it takes.
religion: a man-made classification to even further the segregation process & fill the void that is constantly nagging the unanswerable:
"who are we?" - "where did we come from?" - "where do we go?"
we feel it necessary to claim an option & stick with it, going through our entire lives classifying ourselves as this particular 'religion', never taking into consideration that perhaps "god" is a lot more apparent (& a lot less obtainable) than any of us ever realized.
communication: another man-made system used solely to express ideas. i have several theories on the subject & would love to express them in conversation, so if you are interested, please ask. my philosophies in an over-view would basically be that either written or spoken word were developed by man, & the other system was applied by man. so either a series of grunts or a collection of shapes were taken, then the other was created from it. which do you think came first? & how can you define without definition? ..so which of those came first?
time: the only constant in this variable. another thing that man can't fathom. so he developed limits & boundaries to classify 'right now', or specify either details on a future event, or else to determine when exactly something in the past happened. & only to better suit MAN. there's no such thing as 'time', only:
progression: a status. you haven't given up; life hasn't given up on you.
i like to write & draw. i always have a notebook & a pen on me. i feel inspiration is a combination of:
a.) your surroundings,
b.) your crowd, and
c.) your current mood.
if you have a good idea, don't put it off;
you'll never have the same inspiration back.
i have a lot of clothes, but i always wear the same ones.
if that's not a quality you're looking for in a friend
then good, one less person i have to risk meeting.
i would still do absolutely anything for these guys.
i fear hiting possums because i have such respect for them.
mainly because they're blind.
giraffes can't produce sound because they have no vocal chords.
whales will never be able to smell or hear music.
& porcupines will never recieve the comfort of a hug.
but i don't consider any of them less fortunate than humans;
they all have incredible qualities that i'm somewhat envious of.
i spend at least 85% of my day listening to m u s i c.
i absolutely can't get enough of it.
since i've had my iPod, i have always had it on me.
& it has been playing far more than it has
been turned off.
there are three things you can tell me
that will always make me smile:
1.) telling me i do something more than or something better than other people. i don't usually recognize those things, & it proves you really know me.
2.) telling me things that you have realized about me, such as quirky character traits, tendencies, or what have you.
3.) telling me what makes you think of me. especially music. telling me that a particular band/album/song reminds you of me will make my day.
i love driving. need a ride? i'll give you one.
i accept that no matter what i accomplish in this lifetime, no matter how noble or inhumane, i am going to die.
if i don't know you,
assume i don't trust you.
i think we spend too much time focusing our lives trying to find somebody else we can waste away our lives with. don't look for love; your decisions are so limited if you're involved in a relationship. there are too many cool places to be & people to meet to be tied down. live.
ask me how i feel about 'god'.
i have a beagle named Pig who i love with all of my heart.
he's been the only friend i've ever kept close...
our lives are like timelines;
threads that interweave,
leaving criss-crossed patterns that reflect
who & where we share 'right now' with.
& though the quilt may become stained & frayed over time,
we remember the vibrance we once possessed,
& are filled with familiar, unexplainable memories of bliss.
i don't expect my thread to last longer than 23 years,
& i'm ok with that.
--------------------------------------------------
1.7 people die per second. there's another. & another. & another.
maybe someone you know;
maybe a loved one.
maybe the loved one of someone you know.
it could've been you. could've been me.
appreciate & enjoy your life.
--------------------------------------------------
i don't necessarily think that living makes you old.
thinking; realizing; accepting. those bring you closer to the end.
i take showers & wash my hands
with water that is probably too hot.
i always feel guilty using paper towels.
if i were you, i wouldn't admit to voting for Bush in the '04 election.
i would love to become a tattoo-artist.
i don't know my sexual-orientation anymore.
& i hate society for wanting me to label it.
for the most part, i'd be willing to guess that your perception of life is completely different from mine.
i view everything as art;
everything going on around me i view as a reel of film;
every noise i hear, even conversation, i hear as music; click. tap. rattle. buzz. whir. ping. chirp. honk!
everytime i blink, its like a snapshot of where my life is right at that moment.
[because where you are is where you'll always be right now]. click, flash! click, flash!
recently i've been noticing/realizing that
absolutely nothing makes sense anymore.
we just follow orders;
(whether that be commands or society's idealistic standards
that we've so willingly accepted as what life is supposed to be like).
we kill & destroy for a little bit of money, fame, or knowledge.
& for what? what good will money, fame, or knowledge
get you after this life?
we're a despicable species. & i'm sick of it.
the threads that hold this country together aren't the noble & accepting fabrics you percieve them as;
everything is underlined in greed & self-preservation.
& stained with the blood of other men who knew no more than we do now.
------------------------------ nature gives to nature,
nature gives to man;
man takes from nature,
man takes from man.
------------------------------
we're so terrified of "aliens" with their high-tech equipment & their impressive weaponary.
look around... weare the aliens.
the "aliens" we're so terrified of have flourished.
| i | n | s | p | i | r | a | t | i | o | n |
sometimes OFTEN i think i'm crazy.
if you've read this far, you probably agree with me.
if you are a dreamer, come in.
if you are a dreamer, a wisher, a hoper,
a prayer, a magic-bean-buyer,
if you're a pretender... come, sit by my fire.
for we have some flax, golden tales to spin.
come in, come in.
"i don't want to be an ant. we go through life, bouncing off one another, continuously on ant-autopilot: stop, go. walk here, drive there. all action basically for survival, all communication simply to keep this ant-colony to keep buzzing along: 'here's your change', 'paper or plastic?', 'credit or debit?', 'would you like ketchup with that?'. i don't want a straw! i want real human moments; i want to see you, & i want you to see me. i don't want to give that up. i don't want to be an ant."
--"Waking Life"
Hey if you got a second and havn't done so already, you should cehck out and add my band if you like the music. This Evenings Best. www.myspace.com/thiseveningsbest
yep goin to ISU, actually love it...weird huh. and haha oh the day finally came when you can "legally" drink. even though it never stopped us before...!! and i am in indy every once in a while, so i will just have to give you a call, number still the same?? orrrr, you could check out the new place, seeing as how you never came to the old one :P
holy jesus! jossssssshh. im doin good. how in the hell are you!? ive moved away from indy, and blah blah. you know. happy though. :) what have you been up to boy??
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