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LAST WEEK, THE LADIES WERE LOOKIN SO HOT, THE FELLAS DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!! THIS FRIDAY THE L-TRAIN IS COMING THRU!! HE'LL BE SPINNIN HIGH ENERGY DANCE & BREAK AND DJ LEXX Z WILL BE GIVING YOU ALL THE TOP 40/ HIP HOP YOU WANT TO HEAR AND MORE!! A NEW HOT SPOT IS BORN AND ITS CALLED RICE LOUNGE! EACH AND EVERY FRIDAY NIGHT! RICE IS LOCATED OFF OF THE VETERANS EXPY, ON HILLSBOROUGH AVE, IN THE PLAZA AT THE CORNER OF HANLEY RD. DOORS OPEN AT 10PM. HOPE TO SEE YOU THERE!!!
I got this in an email with jokes about Florida and thought you might get a kick out of it.
Bless this house, oh Lord, we cry. Please keep it cool in mid-July. Bless the walls where termites dine While ants and roaches march in time. Bless our yard where spiders pass Fire ant castles in the grass. Bless the garage,home to please Carpenter beetles, ticks and fleas. Bless the love bugs, two by two, The gnats and mosquitoes that feed on you. Millions of creatures that fly or crawl, In FLORIDA, Lord, you've put them all! But this is home, and here we'll stay, So thank you Lord, for insect spray.
YAY!!! Well, first and foremost, I would like to thank God. Without him I wouldn't have a mouth. I would like to thank Kash N Karry for selling me the maggot infested candy bar. And my wonderful (not) ex-husband for buying it for me. And of course, I can't forget Prevail Pest Control for picking my disgusting story! I will let ya'll know what I buy with my gift card!! Thanks so much! Love always, Jeannie
ok-- i have to win.. A few years ago, i was having a craving for chocolate... so I sent my husband to the grocery store. He brought back one of those giant chocolate candy bars with tofee bits. So I ate some of it and went to sleep. A couple of days later i was sitting on the couch watching TV. So I got the candy bar and broke off a big chunk and started chewing it up. Then I looked down and noticed the toffee bits were pretty big. Then it looked like they were MOVING.... I took a closer look and realized they WERE MOVING!!!! THEY WERE MAGGOTTS!!!!! AND I WAS EATING THEM!!!! I ran to the bathroom and threw up so many times my eyes looked like i had black eyes. I guess the blood vessels burst in them. It was the most DISGUSTING THING ever.
Okay, here's my story for the contest. Aracnophobia. I used to live in a house that had a serious spider problem. They lived mostly on the front porch in the rafters, but they would sometimes venture into the house. I'm in the shower and happen to glance at the plastic curtain, and there sits this two inch long spider less than a foot and a half from me. So I am proceeding to come up with a plan, to escape from the shower and kill this intruder and while I'm looking around for something to kill it with, I see on the ceiling above me there's another one! Oh my God did I freak. I could handle killing one but not when #2 is hanging over my head. I jumped out of the shower and grabbed the only thing close, which was hairspray LOL. It shocked them enough for me to kill them with a shoe but I look around when I get in the shower from now on.
Woo hoo...I get to be first! So, I'm laying in bed trying to go to sleep. I've got the TV on for a little bit of "white noise". I see one of my dogs standing near the side of my bed and he's looking at me and making some weird noises. So, I sit up to turn on the light. When I do, I notice there's a big brown spider on my freakin' pillow! Tucker went nuts and tried to eat him.
I also have a story about a crazy friend of mie who eats spiders, but I'll save that one for another time!
