IN DEVELOPMENT WITH MATT TILLER AND GUS BOUSFIELD AT CHANNEL K.
ORIGINAL IDEA PAUL VICKERS.
MAIN THEME MUSIC WRITTEN BY MIKE SMALL,PRODUCED BY ROGER SIMIAN.
ADDITIONAL MUSIC FROM VICTOR POPE,THE LEG,DAWN OF THE REPLICANTS,MUCKY SAILOR,CLUTCH DAISY AND MANY OTHERS.
The Premise
A comedy sketch show set in a government funded laboratory charged with a task of national importance:
To record….
THE IMPOSSIBLE!
What is the actual sound of the Holy Grail? Is laziness caused by a musical succession of sick notes? And can 400 goldfish bowls act as sub woofers and produce the voice of the damned?
The Laboratory’s main aim is to record all these things whatever the discipline... and so who better to achieve this extraordinary feat than a Doctor, a Scientist, a Mutant, a Holy man and a Magician?
At the bottom line, Recording The Impossible is a sketch show with a set of recurring characters recording and reporting back on their experiments and mostly set in the single location of the laboratory.
Recording The Impossible
Listening to the outer limits for life’s big answers.
THE CHARACTERS
The RTI laboratory is populated by seven main characters who’s general function, aside from being funny, is almost as correspondents in a bizarre magazine show.
Pushy Parker(the child genius)
Is a precocious child employed by the Civil Service to oversee the entire goings on in the impossible laboratory. Pushy Parker is obeyed without question by the rest of the characters; there is quite simply no… higher …authority.
Pushy is little more than child genius tiny bureaucratic dictator who speaks with a slight lisp and a thumb in her mouth. Along side Neil Nevers she co-hosts the show pouring scorn all its imbecilic inhabitants and their misguided pursuit of higher knowledge. Miss Parker is remarkably cynical for her slight years.
Neil Nevers
(The scientist)
Is the show's central narrator. Nevers has a calm, confident Attenborough tone but sometimes makes little or no sense. He speaks in pointed psychobabble as if he is addressing small minds with very big ideas.
Nevers is a highly decorated scientist and globe trotting lecturer, his job is to go over people’s heads while quietly losing his own mind.
Doctor Yes
(The doctor)
Is a thrill seeking zooologist with a booming Brian Blessed style
voice. The missing link between David Bellamy and Anthony Worrall
Thomson and a heady fusion of Fred Dibnah and an L.A sex doctor. Yes is an optimistic fatherly Santa figure but is often ruled by his baser instincts.
He goes about his daily business with a great amount of passion and absolute confidence in his own actions. Like Gillian McKeith, whether or not he is a real Doctor is always in some doubt.
Chang Lee Ping;
(The magician)
Is a mischievous magician and nymphomaniac. He speaks broken English in a babyish Chinese staccato. Flipping from sadistic cartoon villain to shakey pussycat Chang Lee is like the narrator from the 70s TV series, Monkey, speaking in riddles but with an air of the profoundly profound!
Father Black Wright
(The holy man)
Is a madcap, Irish, Frank Drevon-style man of the cloth. His complacency during experiments gives him a loveable presence. He’s a member of the team because it’s assumed having some kind of holy man close during major events may be useful, however he is completely incompetent. Black Wright usually comes across like Terry Wogan at his most knackered (Children in Need at 3 in the morning) Wright takes his ten commandments all the way up to 11.
Lizardboy
(The mutant)
Is the resulting aftermath of an experiment gone wrong. The intension was to turn a Bolton Wanders fan into a West Ham supporter and vice visa. But the experiment went tits up when the pod reversal booths failed to deliver a straight forward switch.
Strangely both football supporters morphed into the same person. That person being the one and only Lizardboy: a freak of nature, a supporter of Bolton Wanders with a cockney accent, a reptilian tail and tall ear fins.
This begs the question: was there an iguana involved?
Lizardboy refers to everyone as "duckie" and is a submissive gimplike character kept in the cellar of the laboratory at the mercy of his masters.
Twinkie
(The storytelling imp)
Is an evil pixie fairy that collects stories from all around the world. Every time an impossible story is told we are sent to Twinkies cottage for an introduction on what we are about to receive. Twinkies cottage is a minute lilliput lane style ornament that sits on the office table of Doctor Yes. There is always a microphone stationed at the front gate waiting to record Twinkies next outburst. Twinkie speaks in a very high pitched voice with almost un-nerving jubilant enthusiasm seeming to spill over into giddy hysteria.
Impossible Guest star appearances:
Throughout the series there a number of cameos of original characters such as Impossible’s sponsor, the motor mouth Ian kerchief, Jimmy the gardener, and hapless striker Bitter Tony. There’s also a rich plethora of deranged celebrity impersonations including Humphrey Bogart, Orson Welles, Harrison Ford, James Stewart, Jacques Cousteau, Minnie Mouse and Dennis Hopper.
STYLE
Impossible is a show that simply bubbles with high octane absurdity, daft wisecracks and baffling conclusions; it blows a fuse so you don’t have too.
Sonically its part DJ mash up, part Jackanory from mars, part sing if you dare knees up with songs about raspberries, robins and Widow Twanky.
Atmospherically it draws from TV classics like ‘The Avengers’, ‘Sapphire and Steel’ and ‘The Twilight Zone’: its all whizzing oscillators and fizzing dials.
RECORDING THE IMPOSSIBLE!
There’s nothing else like it on this planet, Impossible wants to take your brain, cover it in fuzzy felt and lose it down the back of a harmonium!
I like your new Myspace page. Haven't had time yet to read through your writings; however, when I have a spare moment I shall read through them. I recognised your voice straight away. I have just added Mary to my Myspace page and gave her a clue as to my real identity!
Hello Paul Vickers of magical tunes, Of Chinese pop and experimental plumes. Glad you like the secretions from Shark Batter glands, know that yer Mike will be in good hands ;)
If we had to address ivor cutler as Mr Cutler, perhaps now we call you Mr Vickers as you have reached that point sir. Highest regards Charles S. Bravo.
Hello your high priests, pen scribers and splicer-phonic sonic adventurer, enjoyed hearing your latest adventures in audio - look forward to more recordings:impossible in future - this tape will self-adhesive in 2 seconds... Ms Hypnotique www. hypnotique. net
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