Molli Mattice

H (1976 - 2004) - For that one nice year, you were my rock. You showed me how to be proud of myself and helped me to realize how amazing life can be. I was in a bad place when you came along and you knocked some sense into me and gave me the 'tough love' treatment I so badly needed. You told me to look out for myself and make myself happy first and foremost and man, I'm tryin'. I'm tryin' so damn hard. You came into my life in an instant, and then left in quite the same way. I will never get to tell you how much that one year has helped me in everything I've done since. I will always love you, brother, and you will always make me strong. You are the conviction in my heart as well as the lead.

Cent (1980 - 2004) - I adored you as much as I adored my brother. You were the only thing keeping him together and I think you knew that. I know you loved him and I also know you resented him. I forgive you and I know he would too. You kept the man together who kept me together, and for that, I am forever in your debt. I could never even begin to understand the pain you went through those last few years, watching him slowly fall apart and knowing there was nothing more you could do. And when we lost him, I hurt. But what you felt, I can't even begin to fathom. I could never have lived with that kind of uniquely alien pain and with the way things turned out, I suppose you couldn't either. Hiro knew about the affair. He knew from the begining. And he forgave you, because he loved you.You were as much a brother to me as he was. In the end, I am sorry for the selfish way I reacted. I could never have loved him as much as you must have and I now see that. Thank you. Thank you for everything you did for me and thank you for everything you did for H. You were a hero.

J (1976 - 2002) - You were right. Dead on. I wish you could see me now.

Mina (1992 - 2008) - You were my best friend. You were there for me even before I knew I needed you. I took your love and friendship for granted and in the end, I didn't get to say goodbye. I should have been there. You were the only one that never disapointed me. I was so proud of you. You made me the happiest anyone has ever made me. Now, I'm trying to take that happiness and continue my life with it. I have a picture of you next to my bed. I say goodnight to you every night and goodmorning every morning. I hope you can hear me.

George - (1991 - 2005) - Keep on rockin', kid. I never got to know you quite well enough but I hate the way it all turned out. You were loved. I hope you knew that.

Scotty (1982 - 2009) - You were uniquely Scotty. I will never meet another quite like you. With all the shit you were put through and all the shit you got yourself into, and all the shit you tried to keep me out of, you've gotta know I really loved you. You were the first person to stay on the phone with me until the sun came up and You were the first person to trust me enough to share your deep dark secrets. Everyone loved you, but I don't think anyone truly cared about you the way I did. I'm gunna build that fucking catapult over DV, man! I PROMISE you that, son!!!


I wish you guys could read this.