scarlet

About me:

The Scarlet Harlot says:

I'm 18. I'm the smart girl that everyone likes to overlook, and while it is rather lonely, I think I prefer it that way. Sadness has a way of being alluring that cannot be matched by any amount of cheap parlour tricks. I'm kind of a suicide omen. My reputation has not been good for quite sometime, but again, I think I prefer it that way. The fewer people know what you're like from the beginning, the more people get to be pleasantly surprised by your true self. I would like to hope that I dazzle my friends in some way, perhaps different to each of them. There is no greater escape than a good book. I own many. I'm in a relationship... but I love making new friends, or at least maintaining my relationships with my friends - easier said than done. I love them all anyhow. They are my life, my blood, my soul. I hope that I make them as happy as they make me. Even though I can make life hard sometimes... I'm a writer. I write. I'm plagued by ideas for poetry and short stories and potential novels constantly. Mostly poetry. But I'm working on a potential novel called ..The Scarlet Harlot.. thus my name.

Each thing we love is a challenge, and it is hard to know one's own heart, let alone the heart of another - but if it's meant to be, it shall be... and it has been.

..

Lyrics convey what my heart cannot translate into words on its own -- these are more than just blurbs, these are my soul leaking out.

..Loves Me Not..
t.A.T.u.
I complicated our lives
By falling in love with him;
I complicated our lives
Now I'm losing my only friend.

I don't know why I had to try
Living my life on the other side.
Now I'm so confused -
I don't know what to do.

He loves me - he loves me not.
She loves me - she loves me not.
He loves me - he loves me not.
She loves me... she loves me...

I started blurring the lines
Cuz I didn't care.
I started crossing the line
Cuz you were never there.

Nowhere to turn;
No one to help;
It's almost like I don't even know myself.

Now I have to choose.
I don't know what to do...

He loves me - he loves me not.
She loves me - she loves me not.
He loves me - he loves me not.
She loves me... she loves me...

She loves me...

He loves me - he loves me not.
She loves me - she loves me not.
He loves me - he loves me not.
She loves me... she loves me...

Nowhere to turn;
No one to help;
It's almost like I don't even know myself.

Now I have to choose.
I don't know what to do...

He loves me - he loves me not.
She loves me - she loves me not.
He loves me - he loves me not.
She loves me - she loves me not.


Loves Me Not



..All About Us..
t.A.T.u.

They say they don't trust
You - me - we - us.
So we'll fall if we must.
Cuz it's you - me,
And it's all about us.

It's all about us.
All about us.
And there's a thing
That they can't touch.
Cuz it's all about us.
All about us.
We'll run away if we must.
It's all about
All about us.

It's all about love.
It's all about us.
In you I can trust.
It's all about us.

If they hurt you
They hurt me too.
So we'll rise up
Won't stop
And it's all about us.

It's all about us.
All about us.
And there's a thing
That they can't touch.
Cuz it's all about us.
All about us.
We'll run away if we must.
It's all about
All about us.

It's all about love.
It's all about us.
In you I can trust.
It's all about us.

It's all about us...
In you I can trust.
It's all about us.

They don't know -
They can't see -
Who we are.
Fear is the enemy.
Hold on tight -
Hold onto me.
Cuz tonight

It's all about us...


All About Us (Censored)



..Pulse..

You crawled into my bed that night
like some sort of giant insect,
and I found myself spellbound
at the sight of you,
beautiful and grotesque,
and all the rest of that bug stuff.
Bluffing your way into my mouth,
behind my teeth, reaching
for my scars.
That night we got kicked out of two bars,
and laughed our way home.
That night you leaned over
and threw up into your hair,
and I held you there
thinking.
I would offer you my pulse,
if I thought it would be useful.
I would give you my breath,
except the problem with death is
we have some hundred years
until they can build buildings
on our only bones.
A hundred years,
and then your grave
is not your own.
And we lie in our beds
and our graves,
unable to save ourselves
from the quaint tragedies we invent
and undo;
from the stupid circumstances
we slalom through.
And I realized that night
that the hall light
that seemed so bright
when you turned it on,
is nothing
compared to the dawn,
which is nothing
compared to the light
which seeps from you
when you're sleeping,
coccooned in my room,
beautiful and grotesque,
resting.
That night we got kicked out of two bars
and laughed our way home,
I thought,
"I would offer you my pulse.
I would give you my breath."

I would offer you my pulse.
I would give you my breath.



Loneliness eats at my core
I become one with the night
Never to love,
Never to be loved,
Only to create life
By glorifying death.
I try to cut myself
Try to bleed
Try to feel alive
But there is no life here
Only an endless ring of protection.
(c)J.A. Steckling