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May cause headaches/seizures - my humblest apologies!

During the duration of your load here, you may experience the unbearable compulsion to bang your head against your desk or to weep openly into your hands. This is normal, and can be alleviated with a shot of vodka or turpentine [to taste]. If your symptoms worsen or continue, talk to your doctor as they may be signs of a more serious condition.
It used to be worse, quit yer bitchin'.

|Bio|
+Raised by a cup of coffee
+Lives underground
+Insatiable wanderlust
+Plays a mean hopscotch
+Train wreck syndrome
+Gothic Lolita
Blarrrgghh! Basically, i have the mental-capacity of a 12-year old, i "work" 80% of my life, and i like to watch cartoons and shows about morbidly obese people! i like nonpareils and pretty much anything avant-garde. Also, sparkles and unicorns are high on my list of interests. My favorite books are Alice in Wonderland followed by The Wonderful Wizard of OZ [et al.] and Peter Pan. i am an amateur astronomer and photographer. Professional sleeping-all-day-ologist.

|Stats|
Gender: Heartless
Age: Unknown
Birthplace: A lonesome stretch of desert highway somewhere in-between Albuquerque and Reno
Current Residence: Fantasia
Birthday: 2nd March
Blood Type: A
Height: 5' 8''
Weight: 2 metric tonnes
Class: Mage-Rogue
Myers-Briggs: INTP
Enneagram: Type 5
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Marital Status: Not dead yet, but you probably shouldn't bother
Occupation: World-famous billionaire bikini supermodel astrophysicist
Hobbies: Fucking around on the internets, drawing, sewing, reading, random crafts, collecting/stealing coins, catching small creatures, trying to catch larger creatures, climbing trees, chasing rabbits, intergalactic hitchhiking, playing dress-up, tea parties on the ceiling, pretending to know html, assorted faggotry

|Horoscope|
Western: Sun in Pisces, Moon in Ares, Sagittarius Rising
Eastern: Rabbit
Planet: Neptune
Element: Water
Number: 3
Native American: Wolf
Dosha: Pitta
Mayan: Yellow Overtone Star, *galactic activation portal*

|Travels|
[US] California | North Carolina | South Carolina | District of Columbia | Florida | Georgia | Maryland | Pennsylvania | Texas | Virginia | West Virginia
[Other] Belize | Mexico | Nassau, Bahamas

|Interests|
Likes:
Dislikes:
Ships:
Heroes: