ew i hate summer heat! is it really bad in california... that were yu live right? i have been ok, just been getting out of house as much as possible, and i have ben practicing english very well and alot! i think that talkin to people in english help me alot two! XDD
Memorising all of these delicious little words you've taught me. [every word carefully penned down into a little notepad]
Things shimmer and I'm thrilled with all the usual high level anxieties.
Deliciousness. All.
We've been safe, stable, secure and comfortable for long enough, off I race to the Valley of the Shadow. My interior valley girl might triumph at last. <3
I'm dreaming about the moment to see you so we can briefly touch hands, kiss each other's cheeks and make our confessions.
Seasons.
Rain. Sun rise and sunset. Snow. Fall. Of stillness, oppression, secret salvation, collective regret. Because it's too timeless, too immeasurable, too beautiful to be real. and all time, space and being surrounds, surrounding, vanishes, vanishing, bleeding all through and enclosing everyone, everything.
My dreams each night are so difficult and heavy it's an assurance every morning to be awakened.
I hate the feeling of this place they call a restaurant.
Now there grows among all the rooms, replacing the night’s old smoke, alcohol and sweat, the fragile, musaceous odor of breakfast: flowery, permeating, surprising, more than the color of winter sunlight, my creativity overrides and but my time is too divided.
There are things I cannot directly share because they are too strangely beautiful, too unlikely, to unnaturally natural, too... sublime.
Run arms wide open and heart too awake, into the cold and the love and the darkness, it’s time to stop with this attempt at catching up. Trust me, what’s done is done and what’s coming up next can only matter more than anything in the past that’s ever managed to matter
[or even just (seemed) to matter] ever. At all.
So care and care deeply. and give everything you have and even further than that. every time will hurt more and every time will be more beautiful and more worth it.
I think. <3
Kyo's solo CD was such an absurd and wildly offensive and shitty work. I think I managed about sixteen minutes.
I cannot wait to see your reaction as I hold you tight, to enjoy our hysteria, to have your hand in mine and feel that tiny bit of heat in my universe.
Old ghosts are to remind you who you were, and how you've lost your way.
The curtain has been lifted now, a new world behind it, all the indecisions left behind.
A very pleasant time.
Early summer, drinks and dinners and shows, all the usual places doing all the usual things with all the usual people, time suspension, killing time. Waves and crests and ebbs and flows and sometimes people grow close quickly and then just as quickly fall out of touch again as though quickness. (This is something of a sadness, something of a shame).
You are becoming the centre on the patterns of me dependency. A distancing beauty, isolated and isolating, feels like closer to this body than anything else. Inside, and outside of you, secrets flow, and time fades out.
When it's all over, I'm too wrecked to bring peace to myself.
In the mood for love and moved by it all. Again and again and endlessly. With your presence, all the days lately or mostly have been, so attractive and gratifying and undamaged and disheartening and everythings so good and fine and theres too much I want to say, I just keep losing heart, getting sidetracked, lost in thought, looking for something, watching the time go by, listless, dreaming, frantic, anxious, bleeding.
I thought I smelled cigarette smoke, too, as I walked away from the window. The curtains flowing with the night wind with a life of their own. Everything was toneless and cold and beautiful, daybreak, utterly surreal, crushing and weightless and unbelievable.
lakdsjflkjdlfkds NO MORE SUMMER SCHOOL! *spasm* XDD
I actually made friends in class while I was there, and yes, Yui was one of them. Somehow. Plus another fob girl who had a low voice + a cute face.
ah, then someday I'll plan a trip up there to come and see you! or you can meet me halfway somewhere... Didn't see many people at AX, and that was just fine with me. had more fun with Half and Setsu anyway. :]
A part-time job won't get you much for a while, even if you do work twice a week. It might take you a few years to actually get enough to buy a plane ticket to another country D: Especially since airline companies are raising ticket prices everywhere, and are now charging passengers for carry-on lugage.
Maybe you could work at the library and organize books and mooch off the AC there :]
D: no... i'll be going to alaska till sept. I HAVE TO BE UP THERE. (=-=) sucks. i'm going to hawaii 16th thru 23rd as a graduation gift from my bro. but after that going to alaska till sept T_T;;;
Ha ha, well, I finished summer school on Tuesday, so now I can spend my days sleeping and working on projects for next year.
For AP art we have to complete 6 pictures by the time school starts. DDD: oh, f*ck, I need art supplies badly now!
Ugh, it was $20 to get into the concert, plus it was in a different part of the city. So not worth it, especially since none of LM.C is especially attractive, and their music is just so-so... Someone described Aiji as being a Mid-life crisis up there on stage XDD Now if Gazette ever came to America, I'd travel to go see them. Definetly. :]
Good luck with this relationship! Let's see how long you can make this one last. And I totally mean that in a non-sarcastic way. It's always harder to portry emotions through the computer screen. :<
Maybe the mexicans are jealous because you don't have to hide from the government in fear of being deported back to Mexico, ha ha
The greatest art of life is sensation, to feel that we exist, even in pain.
I want my own story.
If you will listen, I will tell you a story--one whose ghosts cannot be banished by the comfort of a roaring fire.
I will tell you the story of how we found ourselves in a realm where dreams are formed, destiny is chosen, and magic is as real as your handprint in the snow.
I will tell you how we unlocked the Pandora's box of ourselves, tasted freedom, stained our souls with blood and choice, and unleased a horror on the world that destroyed its dearest order.
These words will be all a confession of all that has led to this cold, gray dawn. What will be now, I cannot say.
I feel your existence until it hurts.
I used to think I was the only one who felt things, but I really am only one infinitely small part of an aching humanity. It's a good thing most people bleed on the inside or this would be a gory blood-smeared earth.
The walls, instead of being their usual, perky dandelion yellow, feel heavy and ugly and pressing in on me. As my eyes wondered over the sharp slant of the room, I think of a million different ways to express myself, each bleeding from between my lips, slipping through my fingers, and disappearing in the tangled sheets.
Glance at the picture of you on the screen of my phone, it is my name you are holding.
Your laughter is still echoing in my room. Your voice are the whispers soothing my mind.
and what we got is something special, and what we are is a perfect match, no matter what we do, it's always me and you.
I know sometimes it's lonely while you're sleeping. Well, it's lonely for me too. It's alright. Just know that while I'm sleeping, that I'm dreaming of you.
