As the holiday nears, here is a relevant repost on What valentines day is really about.
I am a fairly romantic guy, someone who takes it upon himself to write notes and offer romantic surprises fairly often. So, two weeks before Valentine's Day ( a few years ago), I discussed with my girlfriend how the holiday was such a commercial rip-off and that I was not going to succumb to it. She seemed OK with it and acted like she totally understood. She even talked about how romantic she thought I was. But, when Valentine's Day came around and I did not buy her flowers, she was definitely disappointed…even though she said she wasn't.
A gift on Valentine's Day is very important…but for different reasons than you may think. Rationally, my girlfriend understood the logic of my stance concerning Valentine's Day, but emotionally, well, that is another thing all together. If you really want to be logical about it you need to consider all the issues:
The reality is, most everyone in America acknowledges the holiday and millions of dollars are spent to remind us to think about and evaluate our relationship. I did not consider what my girlfriend was going through on Valentine's Day. She will probably be thinking about your relationship more than usual and, without question, it will be a topic of discussion amongst her friends and co-workers. When she goes to work or meets her friends in the following days, they are going to ask her what the two of you did for Valentine's Day. She could say, "Oh, Shawn doesn't believe in Valentine's Day…he thinks it's a commercial rip-off". But she would rather say, "Shawn sent me my favorite flowers and cooked me dinner" You have to remember that valentines is a cultural holiday in America and when you give her a gift, you are not only showing your affection but arming her with an affirmation she will share with the people around her. In general. You are not giving a gift, you are giving a story to share.
Gift Tip: to a woman, having flowers sent to her is thoughtful, for a man, sending flowers is a way of being thoughtful without putting any thought into it, like foreign aid. Many smart women are onto this, so do something else to show some effort. Remember though, If you have to say it with flowers, a single flowers says, "I'm cheap"
My favorite flowers (Peonies)..: