KELLY GATELY(GUITAR,KEYBOARDS,EFFECTS,VOCALS,NOISE)
CODENAME: GATOR
PHYSICAL LOWDOWN:IF BRUCE LEE DRANK BEER AND ATE CHEESEBURGERS:TIGHT BUT SOFT!
SPECIAL SKILLS:TALKING FOR HOURS WHILE MAKING NO SENSE AT ALL.... BUT NOBODY LEAVES THE ROOM. IT'S JUST THAT INTERESTING?SEAN M. MCDONALD(VOCALS ,KEYBOARDS,SAX)
CODENAME: SEANTOS
PHYSICAL LOWDOWN: BUILT LIKE A THICK BRICK WITH A PORN MUSTACHE
SPECIAL SKILLS:SHIT TALKING DRUG TAKING AND CAN PULL A DOUBLE AT WORK AFTER BEING UP FOR HOURS ON END.
ANDY SIMARD (DRUMS)
CODENAME: SNOWMAN,BACON
PHYSICAL LOWDOWN:SKINNY ARTIST SUSHI CHEF WITH MCENROE CURLY FROTH.
SPECIAL SKILLS: CAN MAKE A CRAB TRAP OUT OF ANY THING
Influences
ROBERT MITCHUM,ILLE NASTASE, MISHAN FOUNTAIN(THE FIRST GIRL I HAD SEX WITH),ARACHNA,JAMESON'S,VIDA BLUE , TOMMY BAR,DR. DUNN, UNCLE DENNIS,PROSCIOUTTO,BBQ PORK,URSULA ANDRESS, RICHARD PRYOR , HAWKWIND, BLUE CHEER,BUDGIE,STEPPENWOLF 7, PAUL LEARY, EURO PORN,REDD FOXX,SUN RA ,FOX MAGAZINE, LEG WORLD MAGAZINE, COCAINE LACED WITH COCAINE,JERRY BUTLER,PETER NORTH, HARRY REEMS,L....S....D,PAUL GIAMATTI,ELTON HOOKER,ROLLIE FINGERSREGGIE JACKSON ,TRACI LORDS,SHLINKTOON,MY MOMMAS TINGA'S,HAR MAR SUPERSTAR,QUINTRON ,BOBBY CONN,BRUCE DERN, STEVE MCQUEEN,FERNWOOD TONITE,BLOW FLY,SPANISH FLY,SEAN CONNERY,ORSON WELLS,THE KING OF COMEDY,CHERI MAGAZINE,BAD TATTOOS ,P.....C.....P,NOPO.
I RECENTLY POSTED MP3'S OF OUR LATEST RECORDING. TRACKED, MIXED AND MASTERED BY MIKE LASTRA AT SMEGMA STUDIOS PORTLAND OR. FULL LENGTH IS AVAILABLE NOW!!! ALSO, KEEP AN EYE ON OUR RECORD RELEASE PARTY NOV 2ND AND UPCOMING SHOWS IN THE NW WITH DAN MELCHIOR (NOV 1-3) WITH TOURS OF THE U.S./EUROPE/ AND INDOCHINA TO FOLLOW
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at Starantula.
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at Starantula.
Outsized personalities thrusting an enlightened Monsters Of Rock onslaught lend themselves to caricature, and it’s too much fun to imagine Starantula as, say, glam commandos—keyboardist Roach the weapons specialist; guitarist Gator the laconic sniper; frontman Seantos the hard-bitten sergeant growling orders below ever-present disco cop shades. Through elongated, shambling intro, as the members kid and preen, you wouldn’t hope for much more than party band. And, then, at once, they lock step upon a groove, the frontman transforms from jovial MC toward atavistic rawk gawd and…they’re still a party band, just seems like an arena should be invited.
It’s not that Starantula play anything too new or difficult, they just do it all at once—think boomboxes turned loud to competing FM Classic stations should the dueling tunes coalesce and transcend their parts, a riffed-up maelstrom ever ready to spill out ‘cept the tunes retain shape and veer somewhere’s you’d never imagine. Masked tightness is the neatest trick.
Credit Kelly ‘Gator’ Gately (Fireballs Of Freedom, Diamond Tuck), David ‘Roach’ Simmons (Fireballs, Divining Rods), bassist Dave Dillinger (Divining Rods, Napalm Beach) and drummer Andy Simard (Power Of County) with the inimitable sound of Starantula. ‘Tis a band, after all, one that’d be impressive even without a frontman. Just, considering the frontman, that’s easy to forget.
Couple thousand years ago, Sean ‘Seantos’ McDonald would’ve wowed crowds with martial odes. Couple hundred years ago, he’d've had a troubadour following. Born slightly after the age of unironic icons, Seantos limns Iggy and Morrison and Diamond Dave through vaudeville wit and wrestler’s physique towards predatory gyrations all his own. Elevating rhythmically from splayed knees, like a man of his build shouldn’t be able to do, he bounds to the mic just as the long-gestating aural cum-shot/chord at last resolves. Porn rock, artfully done and no less sexy because.
This was the last show for Roach (a legend behind the keys; linchpin for some of the northwest’s most influential bands; intriguing story…but, y’know, it’s about the notes you don’t play), and a goodly crowd of local luminaries had come to Audiocinema for tribute. Relatively hidden, practice/artist space adjoining, immaculate library corner studded with lurid band portraits—the venue’s sort of like a post-apocalyptic Friar’s Club. And no better band for a wake or roast. Gator and Seantos have developed a rapport as much Martin and Lewis as Page and Plant, and the band’s an active partner in their showmanship. Patter’s met with feedback. Slackness tightens upon whim.
Audiocinema has no real stage, it’s not the sort of place for video feeds, and, as crowds rolled in, most folks couldn’t catch a glimpse of Seantos. Plenty of room on the sides, of course, it’s just a barely-transformed warehouse, but latecomers stayed to the front—watching Gator, watching Roach, watching the backs of the heads of folks watching Seantos.
Understand, the crowd could’ve easily moved around for a fuller view. And yet. They knew there was a performance. And they knew their place.
To hypnotize without eye contact’s the neatest trick of all.
Jay Horton
we're playing the ROSE CITY ROLLERS AFTER BOUT BASH Saturday Feb. 14th with THE TEXACUTIONERS! maybe even some other band.... 65th and se foster portland, oregon 21+ check it out.....
THEE HEADLINERS - Rain And Blood cd available at Valentines Day Show! full length vinyl lp to be forthcoming at SXSW
official cd release party at Rotture on March 5th with THE FAST TAKERS and PURE COUNTRY GOLD!!!
let's party!
a STARCLEANER/FAMILY PLAN RECORDS release www. starcleaner. com
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