MySpace a place for friends

Goodbye Joe, we gotta go, me-o my-o, gonna bore you all to death with my bio...

I don’t do HTML, so I don’t know how to make these stupid sentences turn into paragraphs, so they’ll just run on. My name is...uh.. Ted Hoffman (I had to look at the page title). I’ve been playing guitar since I was about 13 or 14. I’m originally from the Washington, D.C./Arlington VA area. Moved to Port Huron, Michigan when I was 12. While at a picnic in Sarnia, Ontario, a friend of my mom’s had a guitar, and I bugged the living crap out of him to show me some chords. I’ve been a junkie ever since.

I played my first gig in 1975 at a Junior High School Valentine’s Dance, in a band called "Rhode Apple". Naw...we weren’t that bad, and three of the members are still pretty close buddies (the picture is in my slideshow captioned "Band of Brothers"). After the rock and roll crash and disco craze of the late 70s killed rock and roll bar audiences, I schlepped around playing in country bands, polka bands, wedding bands, anything that I could make a buck doing. I played with an all-original northern "southern rock" band called "Yankee Fire" with some other close buds (now calling themselves the "Borough Brothers"), and then met some other folks and went on to play in a house band called "Dumpstreet" at the now-defunct Colony Bar in Port Huron. When that ended on a sour note (as most bands do), a few of us donned spiked dog collars and spandex and became hAiRbAnD GoDz, using the name "Shrapnel". We gigged, uh, like maybe once or twice. After that came a couple of fun projects, RPM for one. RPM had a lot of fun at the Golden Dawn in the summer of 84, but they still hate me for leaving for another soon-to-be defunct band I think was called "Hot Pursuit" or something. Hot Pursuit might have almost been a really fun band. Seems like something else happened but I can’t remember what. I have vague memories of playing the Canterbury in Sarnia and a crazy stunt that almost got the other guitar player a broken leg.

All during this time, the kids were coming (I’d gotten married). Decided it was time to get a real job...so I went back to school, finished school in Tallahassee, Florida (where I gigged briefly with an oldies band), graduated and moved to Alaska (where I didn’t really gig at all), and then moved here to Kansas City.

And that’s the TRUTHHHPBPBPBPBPB...