No one, not even you, will remember if we were good men or bad. Why we fought, and why we died. All that matters is that today, three stood against many!
Influences
A fleet horse, the open steppe, falcons at your breast, and the wind in your hair.
Members
Allan 'Comedy's Mr Sex' Miller
Steven 'his big thing's magic' Dick
The Dark Destroyer himself, Teddy!!
TV Shows
Films
Grand Theft Anal
TheAmazingBastards's Interests
General
Crushing enemies, seeing them driven before us, and hearing the lamentations of their women!
Books
Not that these are books...but here are some publications views of us (obviously we've cynically avoided listing any criticism and only used the good stuff)
About me: We are Allan Miller, Steven Dick, and Teddy. Together we are The Amazing Bastards! You may have caught us before individually at The Stand Comedy Clubs or at some other gigs. Don't hold that against us, we're much worse combined. We're like Mighty Morphin' Powerless Comics! Despite that, we've been given our own night at The Stand.
We have our own column in The Skinny Magazine, check it out! We are also soon to launch our own podcast featuring highlights of the show, and we'll be looking for people to get in touch and tell us the most amazing thing that they've seen or done. We'll keep you posted on our cyber developments!
We are lazy, childish, self-indulgent, and only moderately talented. However, we do have fun at the show and our audience seem to as well. Because we want to get a cool audience of boozy, laid back, slackers (so we reflect our crowd) we even got The Stand to reduce prices from £5/3concs to £3/2concs. If you're a layabout deadbeat, who only exists to crack sick jokes and lead an immature and ultimately wasteful life - we want you at our show!
We have been reviewed four times now and have always received ***, given our inconsistent nature this consistency is distressing to us. Why not come along and help us to * instead?
If you like the sound of us, come along. If you don't - don't come. Sometimes life really is that simple! :-)
If you like us - add us! We need myspaz friends, we're busy losing the ones we have in real life...
Teddy and Allan also keep blogs, Miller is too modest to plug his on this page, but check his myspaz below and it shouldn't be too hard to find, Teddy is more shameless and his can be found on blog.myspace.com/readyteddycook.
Who I'd like to meet: Amazing Bastards, Beautiful Bastards, Sexy Bastards, Ugly Bastards
Well done bastards. Really enjoyed your show and nice to say hello again, although, that bit where you did... well... stand up? What was that about? I'm sure I even caught a joke or two?
Get back to yours roots; if I don't walk out next time saying "that only cost me 2 quid, and yet I still feel hard done by. Cunts." there will be trouble.
Right You Bastards.. You are *seriously* messing with my Social Calendar!!
Last month you screwed up and performed when I was at the Opera.. This Month I am at a Champagne Tasting!!
Shall be smished by 9pm though - so I really DO think you should delay any comedy until then. When no matter what happens, I will consider you Amazing.. Although I may throw up a little.. xx
My mate just got chucked out of the swimming pool last week and barred. He was wearing Speedos. The police were called, but all was resolved when they discovered that it was just the 'S' that had worn off them. Right off to go light a shit parcel and put it on my neighbour's doorstep......mwah, mwah.
Hi Bastards, how are you all? Just stopping in to say hi and that I have finally bitten the bullet and applied for the Nivea Funny Women Awards 2007! Oh, my goodness - I think a nugget just came out thinking about it! oh. yep. And there's another one........you are Amazing! (and bastards) x x x
