The Cretins

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Insubordination Records

In April 1995, the Boston based pop punk band The Cretins first crawled out from under the rock that kept them from annoying the masses. The band was formed when high school friends Murf and Bernie finally got off there asses and actually got a band together rather than just talking about it. With the addition of Kato and Drummer Dave, the line up was complete. Problem was they had no place to practice. So they got resourceful and showed up at open mic nights and would play/practice until they were kicked of they stage. Which happened rather quickly because they were playing in a metal bar in Revere, MA. Fortunately for them, when one of the bouncers (who was a vest wearing Hells Angel) heard them, he let them play for as long as they wanted because he was a huge Ramones fan. So of course they would play Ramones covers mixed with the songs Bernie and Murf wrote in their living room. The band finally got their own rehearsal space but soon after Bernie left the band. Court documents site irreconcilable differences. Tabloids report it was over a girl.

The band continued with the remaining three until Kato and Murf decided Drummer Dave's drinking was getting in the way of playing. Some say this is where The Cretins story really begins. Kato and Murf placed an ad for a drummer and AJ was the first to answer. The audition was to take place in Murf's living room because once again they were without a rehearsal space. The doorbell rings. Murf answers the door. AJ introduces himself, "Hi, can I use your bathroom?" After several minutes of screaming, AJ emerged from the bathroom followed by a smell that would wake the dead. No audition necessary. At that moment in time AJ became AJ Cretin.

With this lineup the band ventured on. At that time the world famous bar the Rathskellar, affectionately known as the Rat, was still open and had all age matinee shows every weekend. The band would play every other weekend for free trying to build a fan base. Right around this time Murf did a brief stint with The Queers as their second guitarist. When Murf returned, another of many roster changes took place. Kato left the band. Some say it's because he was heir to the throne of Liechtenstein and had to fulfill his obligation. Others say it was over a girl. No one will ever know. Kato was replaced by DB and Chris Kraut was added on guitar. They recorded their first 7" soon followed by the EP "I Feel Better Already" both on the Melted records label. Fall of '96 they went on their first tour. They started as a four piece but came home a three piece. No one is really sure what happened to DB. Some say he's doing porn in Vegas others say he's buried in the woods outside Raleigh, NC.

The full length "We're Gonna Get So Laid" was released on Melted and many tours would follow. Multiple roster changes would also follow but it was always AJ and Murf as the back bone of the band. The boys continued on until the year 2000, when they crawled back under the rock from which they came from. Some say it was Y2K, others say it was over a girl. No one will ever really know.

October 2008. Realizing that pop punk is greatly needed in the Boston scene, The Cretins re-emerged from under that very same rock. With the new roster of AJ, Murf, Gardner, and Mr. Altman, The Cretins are ready to take over the pop punk throne once again. Who we kidding. They never had it. But they are back, and have a new album out on Insubordination Records.

Member Since:

February 09, 2006

Members:

Influences:

Broken Hearts and wet farts

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Record Label:

Insubordination Records