The Flowbee Hairstylist

Who I'd like to meet:

FLOWETRY IN MOTION
BY VIDAL

The Shitz
Vidal has the shitz
went to taco bell
had a nacho bell grande
now Vidals fanny burns like hell
Had to run to the ladies room
all day at the salon
Wish Vidal could plug it up
with a fantabulous tampon.
What can Vidal do
to stop this river of poo?
Vidal is so depressed
time to go shopping for some shoes.

A Victim of Sexiness
Vidal is a victim
of sexiness, babes!
Vidal cannot help it
Vidal gets paid to get laid
If you were fantabsolutely
fantabulous like moi
oh mon dieu bebe,
pas possible!
Vidal's hair is so gorgeous
Vidal's lips so sweet
They taste like candy babes
Knock Knock, trick-or-treat
Vidal's eyes sparkle
like a majic penny
hold it tight
and you won't get any
Oh to be Vidal
is such a thrill
A Victim of sexiness babes
George Foreman's got nuttin on this Grill

Morning Wood
once a timepon
vidal had morning wood
the alarm went off
but vidal didnt feel good
vidal was so frightened
of the monstrosity in his pajamas
tried to make it go away
and even hit it with a hamma
but the only solution
was to get it removed...so
snip snip lil wee wee
thank you Dr. 90210

Hairy Toes
The hair on Vidal's toes...
Oh babes, They are such a delight!
Why wax them, or tweeze them?
They keep Vidal warm at night.
Vidal shampoos them, blowdries them,
and brushes them down.
Sometimes Vidal applies mousse
when there is a stubborn hair around.
If they were only longer,
Vidal would definitely braid them.
Maybe dreadlocks, or even beads,
but Vidal would never shave them.
When Vidal goes to the beach
and sticks his toes in the sand,
sometimes a few grains get caught
in the hair on Vidal's fan-
tabulous toes, so strong, and yet, oh so petite
like a Halloween night,
they are candy on Vidals feet

Ode to Ambertr0n
Roses are red
Urine is yellow
Vidal is stopping by
to say "Hey there, lil' fellow!"
Ambertr0n, Ambertr0n,
Vidal's fantabulous pet...
Does the thought of Vidal's 'stache
make Ambertr0n wet?
Does your heart go pitter-patter
when you think of Vidal?
Did you see that shoe sale
at the fantabulous outlet mall?
Do your toes start to curl, babes?
Does your lip start to quiver?
When you think of Vidal, babes,
does your body start to shiver?
These are the symptoms of Fantabulousness.
5 out of 5 dentists recommend Vidal
but only 4 of 5 recommend Crest.


♥ Vidal
xoxoxxo