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God

		God Almighty Welcomes and Embraces You, Now BEHAVE Male 103 years old Everywhere Israel Last Login: 3/24/2009

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MySpace URL:

www.myspace.com/therealoldtestamentgod

God's Interests

General	I'm interested in EVERYTHING. I'm EVERYWHERE. And now, I'm even on MySpace. Maybe now someone will start paying attention!
Music	I like the Bee Gees. Always did. Monk music too. And Gospel. Choirs are good. Handel...Wow. Never liked harpsichords, and for some reason people think I do. Well I don't. I like Enya as a person. Whale songs are nice. And a mother's lullabies. But mostly the Bee Gees.
Movies	I like it when they turn my book into a movie. "The Ten Commandments" was fairly accurate, but Moses was no Charleton Heston. He was actually a little guy who stuttered a lot. True story! "The Bible" was pretty good. That George C. Scott was something. "The Real Old Testament" was silly. Silly silly silly. But maybe the kids'll like it: realoldtestament.com
Television	I don't have time for televison. And you shouldn't either. Go to temple! Do good works! Come on already!
Books	The Torah, The Old Testament of The Bible, other sacred texts...but I'm really not much of a reader.
Heroes	Please

God's Details

Status:	Single
Here for:	Serious Relationships
Hometown:	Originally I Moved Over the Face of the Waters
Zodiac Sign:	Capricorn
Smoke / Drink:	No / Yes
Occupation:	All-Seeing Creator of Everything

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God's Blurbs

About me:
I'm Everything. The Creator, the All-Seeing, the All-Powerful, etc. It's pretty cool, actually, but not always. For instance people RARELY pay attention to me, they go back on their agreements all the time. That sucks. I mean you'd think they'd APPRECIATE all I've done, but whatever.

Who I'd like to meet:
You. Afterwards. At my place. But it's up to you. And remember, I've been watching!

God's Friend Space (Top 23)

God has 1333 friends.

The Real Old Testament

Juniper

Kelley

Pete Holland

Matt

Filmfest Oldenburg

Francesca

Miss Kellee

Christiana

Mary Catherine

Bandit

Dan

juicybaby

David Mulholland

richroll

JADA!

Kaitlin

John Gallagher

David Avallone

Iris Bahr

Amanda Bryn

Amy Raasch

Sidewalk Moving Picture Festival

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God's Friends Comments

Displaying 25 of 168 comments ( View All | Add Comment )

JADA!	Jul 28 2008 2:25 AM Dear God, I was just trying to leave you a comment and my computer completely shut down. Was that a sign? If it was, I don't think I understand. So... now here I am leaving you a comment (sign shmine!) and I've totally forgotten what I was going to say. Poop. Love your face off anyway. (as per ushe) Bear hugs, -J
Bandit	Jul 18 2008 3:13 AM Oh Hello there, God! I'm excited about your new movie! And I'm excited about your new vlogs, and I'm excited... in general. It's been a while.
AMBER	Jul 31 2007 3:34 AM GOD!! So great to hear from you oh Holy One!! I NEED MORE COPIES OF YOUR MOVIE!! It seems to be the wine and bread which brings all people together! I LIVE BACK IN LA NOW!! I need to come by and say 'hi'!! HUGE GIGANTIC HUGZ AND SQUEEZEZ AND STUFF!!
Francesca	Jan 17 2007 10:59 PM Long time no news.. dear God, you are always in my prayers...thanks for listening even when the volume is too high ! hope you are very well! ps send an extra cherubino on my way Francesca
Miss Kellee	Jan 11 2007 6:01 AM I'm great, YOU'RE great!!!
AMBER	Sep 27 2006 10:32 PM Hello my dear neighbor, oh great one the Lord Almighty~ Just thought that you would like to know that your movie just showed its 18th viewing at my house alone!! Everytime I see it, I just cant stop LAUGHING!! You are a very very funny man! LOTS OF HUGS AND LOVE!! Your servants, Amber, Chris, Nairi, Zu :)
Juniper	Jul 26 2006 9:00 PM Hey God, Just wondering about Global Warming--It's happening, I get that--any suggestions? It's just so freakin hot I can't believe it! Is there a weird sin that we don't know we're commiting that you're punishing us for? Maybe we're not supposed to wear clothes made in sweat shops?
bojangles	Jun 27 2006 5:14 AM GOD im so sorry i haven't talked to you in forever... how are you?
MC Rivendell	Jun 18 2006 3:48 AM Hey God. Thanks for kickin' back. Trust me, I know You're a busy Guy, and when You take some time out of Your schedule of saving people's lives, healing broken hearts, making blind men see, overly prospering televangelists, and the like, to leave me a comment, it really blesses me. I have a question, God: if at the end of time You're gonna come back and destroy the whole earth with fire before You rebuild it, is it ok for me to throw my empty cup out the car window? And what's with these damn mosquitos?!?!?!?!?!? Amen
David Avallone	Jun 14 2006 6:14 PM God is originally from Colorado. This is not widely known. The Serpent is actually God's brother, and he's a terrific card player. Which stands to reason, I suppose.
aharonmusic.com	Jun 12 2006 10:59 PM Hey could you please get your friends to check out my music site and have them add me. How are u? Great I hope. I also hope that you were busy last week and were'nt paying attention to all the bad things I did. But I really am sorry. Peace and Love. Aharon.
Яγąи	Jun 10 2006 7:08 AM hey dude hows it going?! going good here just skating 24/7! its rad as fuck! just seeing how things are going in heaven! comment back... por favor (please in spanish)
Stacy	Jun 10 2006 4:12 AM Dear G_d, I'm really digging the vlog on your website. It really is one of the highpoints of my week. Oh, do you think you could slip me those lottery numbers after all? I've got to finance the next 4 episodes of my series! One of your herd, Stacy
JADA!	Jun 9 2006 7:38 PM Dear God, I was deeply sorry to hear about your dog. (do dogs go to heaven?) Jurassic Bark: amazing! If I figure out how to do it, I'll post a clip of my doxie chasing an enormous moose out of the yard. It's worthy of a godly chuckle, fer sher. Love your face off, as per usual. xo -J
Angie	Jun 9 2006 4:35 PM Thanx for the add God, I flippin love u man! Oh yea, hope this isn't too much but can u please send me a nice boy...u know what I like ;)
Jenny	Jun 9 2006 2:56 AM Hi God! Thanks for the add. And don't sweat the waiting thing, I'm cool. Hey, I am having a problem viewing your vlogs-it may be my computer, I don't know. I just figured, you being God and all, maybe you could take a look at it? Anyway, thanks again, and I'll really work on that swearing thing. And the coveting. And the whole impure thoughts business. I swear. But not in a bad way! sigh.
juicybaby	Jun 7 2006 6:33 PM DESCRIPTION by Shel Silverstein George said, "God is short and fat." Nick said, "No, He's tall and lean." Len said, "With a long white beard." "No, " said John, "He's shaven clean." Will said, "He's black." Bob said, "He's white." Rhonda Rose said, "He's a SHE." I smiled but never showed 'em all The autographed photograph God sent to me.
The Wiley One:::Go Green Available Now on Itunes	May 25 2006 9:00 PM WHy Havn't you punished the BUSH administration and the rest of the elite and their minions ??
ALIAS Atheist Mark.. Magnifying REALITY	May 25 2006 8:59 PM David Blaine and Chris Angel are pulling off some stunts that make what Jesus did look like Cheap Parlor Tricks. Dan Browns telling everybody all the dirt on your kids indiscretions with his book. Some Wiz Kid named Tom, started Myspace.com, , an international web site that everybody thinks is Heaven, and everybody wants their own place there. You need to update your Heaven so people will still want to go there. You dont even have any music up there (except that Harp crap, playing in the background, who can dance to that?) And you wont allow any pictures of yourself to be shown anywhere. People like pictures. Toms picture pops up a million times a day. He is not embarrassed to show his style. Paris Hilton asked me, , Does God wear Bellbottoms?, , I had to tell her, How do I know, Ive never seen him. It would help your image a lot to show yourself now and then. I have many other complaints, but right now, Ive got to go convince some guy who tried to kill himself that it is a Miracle he is still alive. So please, have a talk with your boy, tell him to get down here pronto, and you try to lay off the severe weather thing. I cant keep telling people , , Mother Nature caused the bad weather. Fewer and fewer people believe in her now days. Its getting hard to be a true believer in the face of such neglect from you. Take a hint from Toms success, and pay attention to your followers Your obedient servant. Mark The Friendly Realist
Yo Mama	May 25 2006 5:07 PM Thank you God!
Chi-Chi and the Greek Vintage	May 25 2006 4:29 PM why is the sky blue?? why do people suffer? why are brazillian waxes so painful--this keeps me up at nite, God!! why did that joke win american idol??? why do people care? thanks allah!! Madame de Pompadour
carrie.	May 25 2006 3:11 PM You know, I kind of like the Bee Gees too.
JADA!	May 24 2006 6:56 AM Dear God-- Thanks for making wine, and various other boozes and stuff. You're neat. I love your face off!
MellyMel	May 23 2006 5:28 PM Thank you so much for finally letting me into your myspace kingdom! i am gracious to be among only 600 or so others! And may i also thank you for not doing the flood thing, i really hate the rain. As you know my hair is really curly and i like to wear it straight, so the 40 days of rain thing would have really messed that up. Talk to you later, God. Youre the best! Love, Melissa :)
juicybaby	May 23 2006 11:41 AM HALLELUJAH!!! Need I say more? Love, The Juicy-little-one

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