Tim Statum
Stand-Up / Redneck/Country
|
|
|  |
"Dry it up and quit you're bitchin'...."
Male
44 years old
Graysville, ALABAMA
United States
Last Login: 9/5/2008
|
|
|
|
View My:
Pics
| Videos
|
|
 |
|
|
http://www.myspace.com/timstatum |
|
|
|
Tim Statum's Comedian Bio
|
| Bio | I'm a Birmingham native and my comedy is southern style humor and storytelling. I headline at The Comedy Club Stardome here in Birmingham and other clubs throughout the southeast. I incorporate real life stories of growing up in the country with classic stand up comedy. | | Website | timstatum.com | | Influences | Vince Lombardi, Bear Bryant and Bitsy Statum. None of them have anything to do with comedy, but they all could whoop my ass! | | Albums | I've got two CDs. My first one I recorded early on in my career and is called Straight From the County Line. My second CD I recorded after I was more seasoned in the business and is called Tim Statum - Stand Up. Both CDs are excellent (yes, I'm modest). Money back guarantee. I guarantee if you don't like them, you don't get your money back :) Visit my website for merchandise info. |
|
|
Tim Statum's Interests
|
| General | I love Crimson Tide football. All other college football comes next. When I'm home, I like to throw something on the grill and enjoy a cold malt beverage or two. I also like to do home improvement projects. I used to like playing sports, but now I'm too old. But I still can still play ping pong, shoot pool and throw darts with the best of them. | | Music | I like country music, but the old stuff. If it ain't got a steel guitar in it, I don't want to hear it. My favorites are Merle Haggard and George Jones. I was moping around when I got divorced from my first wife and my daddy told me that I needed to get a George Jones album (no CDs at the time) and a bottle of whiskey and get the hell over it (my daddy didn't even drink). Best advice I've ever been given because it worked and I've been a fan since. | | Television | I watch the occasional sitcom, but mostly I watch ESPN and the History Channel. I don't do reality shows, unless you're Gene Simmons, Mr. T or your last name is Tuttle. When I watch American Choppers, I feel like I'm at my in-laws' house in Morrisville, PA across the river from Jersey. But I think my wife's Aunt Jen could take Paul, Sr. Seriously. In a morbid fascination kind of way, like staring at a fatal car crash, I like Dog the Bounty Hunter. How can you not like a guy with a mullet who catches fugitives on an island? Ok, maybe I do watch reality shows. | | Heroes | Bitsy Statum. If you didn't know him, you missed out. He was the best. |
| Groups:
|
Comedians of the Triad, HAFTA, Off Road Arkansas, The Lost and Found Children, State Taxpayers on Patrol....STOP
View All Tim Statum's Groups
|
|
|
Tim Statum's Details
|
| Status: | Married | | Here for: | Networking, Friends | | Orientation: | Straight | | Hometown: | Graysville | | Body type: | 5' 11" | | Ethnicity: | White / Caucasian | | Religion: | Other | | Zodiac Sign: | Aquarius | | Smoke / Drink: | No / Yes | | Children: | Proud parent | | Education: | High school |
|
|
Tim Statum's Schools
|
Corner High School
Warrior,Alabama
Graduated: 1982
Student status: Alumni
Degree: High School Diploma
|
1979 to 1982 |
|
|
![]() |
| Clips: 1 |
Total Plays: 1517 |
Plays Today: 25 |
|
|
|
Run Time:
131
|
Plays:
1517
Comments:
1
|
|
Tim Statum's Blurbs |
About me:
To quote the late, great Michael Reed, I'm as country as a brown egg. I grew up in Linn's Crossing, Alabama, population 10, a poor country boy with no indoor plumbing until I was in the 3rd grade (no joke). I had a hell of a father who a was hard working, no drinking, no smoking bad ass who kept my stupid ass in line. Toughest man I ever knew. I try my best to be like him and I'm not even close. I'm married to the Good Witch from the North and have 3 wonderful kids. If you're southern, or know someone who is, I'm like that granddaddy or uncle who sits around and tells stories, trying to make you laugh until you piss your pants. Most of my storytelling is 95% true. The 5% that's not true is when I talk nice about people :) I love college football and ROLL TIDE, even during the seasons when they almost get beat by Duke. I bleed crimson. I wish they played ball like they did in the 1970s when they would come to the sideline with a broken arm and the coach would pull the meat back over the bone, put some tape on it and tell them to DRY IT UP and get the hell back out there. And they would do it because they weren't sissies like they are now. I miss the good ole days.
| | |
